How to keep a harem novel family-friendly... like, no cursing, suggestive themes, etc. AT ALL?

[CadmarLegend]

So, how can I create a perfectly fine novel where there's a harem, but no suggestive themes? Like, there can be some PDA, but not a lot...

 

[CupcakeNinja]

Focus on romance instead of fanservice.

 

[WasatchWind]

So, how can I create a perfectly fine novel where there's a harem, but no suggestive themes? Like, there can be some PDA, but not a lot...

Oof... family friendly harem? That's a bit of an oxymoron, and I'm not really even joking.

 

[Discount_Blade]

So, how can I create a perfectly fine novel where there's a harem, but no suggestive themes? Like, there can be some PDA, but not a lot...

Yeah, going by your requirements of "family-friendly", just don't bother writing a harem.

 

[CupcakeNinja]

Yeah, going by your requirements of "family-friendly", just don't bother writing a harem.

I mean...its not hard to do tho. Just dont write sex scenes. Keep it to shit like hand holding and a kiss or two. Thats what most jap harems do anyway. Cut out the fanservice and write a serious romance with the girls and you're fine.

Actually, even XIANXIA novels do it fine. The romance aspect is usually lacking. But they get harems done without sex scenes.

It aint that difficult

 

[someonesomeguy]

well that's easy just make them talk philosophy of life for 2 chapters and help each other with there emotional problems by talking.
Bonus points if you do
"You are first person who has the same interests as me and with whom i genuinely want to talk too and also
Thank you for accepting me"
the thing is if everyone has personality more than just a archetype and people actually talk with each other than readers may question.
"Why does this harem exist in the first place then why haven't they talked this issue over "

 

[TunTun]

Really hard to write any family friendly fiction. This is because family friendly fiction is a puritan social construct.

The devil is in the details. Books is not a family friendly medium.

 

[EternalSunset0]

Just dont write sex scenes. Keep it to shit like hand holding and a kiss or two.

I second this

 

[WasatchWind]

Really hard to write any family friendly fiction. This is because family friendly fiction is a puritan social construct.

The devil is in the details. Books is not a family friendly medium.

I disagree. There are many wonderful books I consider family friendly - just not in genres like harems.

And I don't see the need to be so salty about family friendly media. You want kids to have interesting appropriate things to read for their age, and then you have adults like me that prefer not to read stories with sexual content.

 

[Agentt]

I really don't see what's hard about that. For someone like me who has trouble writing romance, it's perfect. All you do is to not have them married. Keep them at good friends. Like "Rascal doesn't dream of bunny girl senpai" did. I know that title is suggestive but it is a family friendly harem.

 

[Deleted member 26725]

So, how can I create a perfectly fine novel where there's a harem, but no suggestive themes? Like, there can be some PDA, but not a lot...

Watch this:

 

[Sabruness]

i dont know. maybe have the whole harem and protag be dense betas who wouldnt know anything about love, romance, sex etc even if you beat them over the head with them.

 

[hyperkvlt]

Watch this:

LOL, a harem that cover both dudes and chicks, who tried to kill each other to get the protagonist.

It was fun when I read the main story, but after the graduation it was somewhat boring since everyone, like, disappeared.

 

[TunTun]

I disagree. There are many wonderful books I consider family friendly - just not in genres like harems.

And I don't see the need to be so salty about family friendly media. You want kids to have interesting appropriate things to read for their age, and then you have adults like me that prefer not to read stories with sexual content.

Kids have children's books. But then they hit HS at 13, and the libraries are filled with mature content that wouldn't be family friendly.

Unless you count the hungers game as family friendly. Any content that has Guns, alcohol, drugs, suicide, blood, gore, shocking content all immediately ceases to be family friendly.

 

[gaylolis]

just set them in alabama, problem solved.

 

[Yairy]

Is it really that difficult to make female characters who feel human instead of sex objects for guys to gawk over about their 3 sizes?

Let me give you an example story I would write if someone asked me to make a harem story that's family-friendly.

If you make a story about 4 girls...

1) Childhood friend
2) Girl Next Door
3) New Friend
4) Old Crush

Now they are all in the same place (I like writing modern stories so the school or something similar. But this could be fantasy, mystery, or whatever the heck you feel like it should be.)

Childhood friend develops new feelings for x protag.
Girl next door is in the same class with x protag and begins hanging out with him more often than x protag's childhood friend.
New classmate x helped out and now has a crush on x protag.
X protag sees old crush in the new year of school.

There's my set-up harem story now how can I keep this family-friendly etc. etc?

Each person is human first, love interest second. They all have their own problems and worries and x protag being a good person to confide in, come to about their problems leads to them going on cute hangouts, alone study sessions, casually eating out that turn into feeding one another their favorite foods. (I'm sure someone can think of 100s of fun ideas that they can do while listening to the heroine's problems and making them feel more human than harems tend to do.)

Then you make the final choice...which 4 girl will be x protags main love?

Get your readers invested emotionally while keeping things light-hearted and fun. Because in real life I'm sure many of us haven't experienced falling into a girl and groping her by mistake, seeing a girl's panties by accident wind blowing, and the like. Let's be honest, harems are unrealistic fantasies made for self-fulfillment in the end. (Which isn't bad as some love to be in the middle of that kind of stuff.)

To be honest, I wouldn't dislike harems as much as I do if the writers in most wouldn't objectify women the way they do. Make your characters human, that's the best way to go about a family-friendly harem.

 

[WasatchWind]

Kids have children's books. But then they hit HS at 13, and the libraries are filled with mature content that wouldn't be family friendly.

Unless you count the hungers game as family friendly. Any content that has Guns, alcohol, drugs, suicide, blood, gore, shocking content all immediately ceases to be family friendly.

Well depends on where you look - at that age, there are things like Fablehaven, Percy Jackson, Reckoners, and a number of interesting pieces of fantasy and science fiction that aren't too harsh.

Of course, it all depends on the person's preference - I was reading by my own choice sci fi like Orson Scott Card and even Michael Crichton at the time, which definitely isn't family friendly, but I would gloss over moments of violence or other harsh content.

It all depends. I do think there is plenty of reading appropriate for that age group though.

 

[Discount_Blade]

I've never understood people's concept of harem. If MC does NOT end up with 3 or MORE women in a romantic/sexual relationship, then it is NOT a harem. Just 2 is not a harem btw. Stop saying it is.

If it just ends with no decision, or him getting with only one, it ceases to be a harem. It makes the entire use of the tag/genre an outright lie. And also, all these manga and anime that use harem as a tag, are NOT real harem's until the relationships are official. The whole bullshit drag-on of the story leading up to them being official, is not a harem. It's courting. Just because many women are chasing same man, doesn't mean it's a harem. It's not. Anime/manga have lied to you. It is ONLY a harem when MC decides to make it official with 3 or more relationship candidates. Not before. This is where most media/entertainment fuck up.

And seeing as I can't imagine any dude dating 3 women or more successfully, and not at least one of them trying to be sexual earlier if for no other reason then jealous or trying to get ahead of the other wives/girlfriends, or just plain being proactive, or just the man being proactive himself...a family friendly harem is bullshit.

Let's not be naive. I mean if you want to pretend it's possible, than sure. But it's not realistic in any sense of the word.

 

[Deleted member 45782]

I don't think a family friendly harem is realistic. Especially if you're gonna write the "how" of how they all came to be together....

I mean, its Romance....

You could totally write romance without smut or a innuendos and stuff but...its seems kinda huh...for harems...especially what most people associate them with they have a lot smut, right?

 

[WasatchWind]

don't think a family friendly harem is realistic. Especially if you're gonna write the "how" of how they all came to be together....

My opinion on this is very complex for an important reason - I am descended from Latter-day Saints in early Utah who practiced polygamy. While this is often depicted by popular culture as nothing but the highest of evils, and often referred to as a harem, from my study of historical sources and reading what they thought on the matter - both the records of men and women involved in it, I have come to some interesting conclusions.

They believed that God desired for some members of the church to engage in the practice - based on their own wills, and the desires of their potential spouse. It has been unclear to me how much of this was based in sexual desires - as they don't usually write down such things.

However, early on in the history of this practice, a number of people were mortified at the practice - including the church's founder, Joseph Smith. But by the time the church had been firmly established in Utah, a number of people in the church were involved in the practice - but no more than 1/5th of members were involved in some way (as in, a parent or child of these relationships).

While these people are often depicted as horrible oppressors of women, in the historical record, I found that such events were exceptions rather than more common. In fact, I've found record of women who sought plural marriage in order to flee abusive marriages. When the US government sought to destroy the church and the practice by absurdly strict laws that forbid church members from voting, women traveled around the country, protesting the laws, and writing books condemning the laws.

For some people, this practice was a literal Godsend. The church fled to Utah after persecution, and even the order of the Missouri government, drove them from their homes, resulting in horrible violence, and much death from things like cholera. This resulted in a number of widows in the church, who were then able to join plural marriages and have a family again.

From its peak, the practice declined until less and less members were entering into the practice, and in 1890, the church announced that it would no longer approve any new plural marriages, and any new such marriages would put the participants at risk of losing church membership. Those that refused this change in policy broke off and formed a new church - the FLDS church, which still practices polygamy, and is not affiliated with us.


*deep breath* Okay. That was a long history lesson. But I think it is very important to understand my views on the matter. I exist because Franklin D. Richards had multiple wives. From what I have studied, it appears that he was loving to his wives, and the children he had in these marriages. I have great respect for these men and women, who despite their personal misgivings, and the hatred of the society around them, they chose to follow what they believed was right, and because of it, me, and countless people I know exist.

So when I see all this stuff about harems, it fills me with disgust. These are not anything like what I've read in my history, but something done only to fulfill lust. When people want to express hate against our church's histories, they refer to what they did as harems. They make them out to be horrible people seeking only the basest desires.

It makes me very uncomfortable then to see all this harem stuff. It is not only spitting in the face of my views on the sacredness of intimacy, but it reminds me of the hatred I have heard from those who hate my church.


So, in summation - a discussion about my church's history, and perhaps something like it, I think could be done in a family friendly way. Harems however I do not think can be done so at all, because the only goal is sex.

If you enjoy these kinds of stories, I will not shame you - I feel that I have been far too judgmental of the reading preferences of some on this site. However, I think it is disingenuous to lie about my views - such would be cowardly.