Writing Prompt "Are you sure about this? I'm not sure flirting and explosives are the right things to use in this situation..."

HURGMCGURG

That Guy
Joined
Jan 22, 2019
Messages
364
Points
133
"Trust me man, she's a pyrophilliac."

"A what?"

"She's into that kind of stuff."

"Uh, I'm not sure I'm comfortable dating someone like--"

"Are you kink shaming her?"

"What? No, I mean--"

"Then just go over there and set off the C4. Trust me, she'll love it."

"But the property damage--"

"It's fine, it's fine. No one using this place anyways."

"It's my apartment building!"

"Well, it's the perfect time for you to get a new one."

"But what about all the people--"

"What are you, a coward?"

"... What did you just call me?"

"Coward. With a capital C."

"... Fine. I'll do it."

"That's my man! Now, go over to the spot, wait until she walks by, invite her over and you're all set for a hot and passionate romantic encounter!"
 
Last edited:

BenJepheneT

Light Up Gold - Parquet Courts
Joined
Jul 14, 2019
Messages
5,344
Points
233
"Trust me man, she's a pyrophilliac."

"A what?"

"She's into that kind of stuff."

"Uh, I'm not sure I'm comfortable dating someone like--"

"Are you kink shaming her?"

"What? No, I mean--"

"Then just go over there and set off the C4. Trust me, she'll love it."

"But the property damage--"

"It's fine, it's fine. No one using this place anyways."

"It's my apartment building!"

"Well, it's the perfect time for you to get a new one."

"But what about all the people--"

"What are you, a coward?"

"... What did you just call me?"

"Coward. With a capital C."

"... Fine. I'll do it."

"That's my man! Now, go over to the spot, wait until she walks by, invite her over and you're all set for a hot and passionate romantic encounter!"
Last night around 2 am near District C, a loud explosion heard under a radius of 10 miles can be seen. Authorities claim that illegally purchased C4 plastic explosives have been used by the culprits who are either obliterated on scene or on the run. The victim of the blast is an apartment building belonging to many long-time residents, now fearful that they might have been targeted by a potential terrorist attack or a gang warfare, recently rampant around said district.

One account, however, stated that the blast is nothing but a show of love to her. "I've never seen anything as lovely as this," 24 year old Pyro Gal states." Whoever you are out there, my heart is yours. Hit me up, or I'll find who you are, blow you to pieces and use your skin as lingerie! <3"


-

The man closed the newspaper cut-out, now crumpled and fitting snugly in his palm. He shoved it back into his pocket and adjusted the bowtie on his sweating neck. He's already nervous about the fact that he's walking into a crime scene he's guilty of,

but meeting the love of his life is a whole new level.

He held the bouquet firmly in his wounded, bandaged right palm. He did a last-minute check on it. Sure enough, the roses were there, bright in ruby red and fresh, just as he brought it from the florist's. He parted a few stalks and heaved out a sigh of relief.

The ticking C4 was still inside, counting down to midnight where he'd finish his magnum opus of a plan to take his admired's hands as his.

He took a deep breath, pulled his bowtie one last time and knocked on the door.

The mahogany door swung open to heaven's top angel.

Dressed in a fire-red tank-top and denim shorts, Pyro Gal just seemed to grow in beauty the more he looked. Her aura screams of energy and unrelenting vigor. Standing almost a head shorter than him, the man couldn't help but take a second to ogle at the angel in front of his eyes. She had the figure of a lady, fresh into maturity with decent curves flowing from her neck to her waist, from her hips to her thighs, all brimming with vitality. Locks of golden hair draped to her shoulders, basking in the radiant glow of the morning sun.

Best of all, she still had her gas mask on.

Matte black with tinted glasses, he could hear her erratic breathing behind her air ports. He'd seen her face once in college and admittedly, she was quite the looker, with or without the mask. However, if given the choice, he'd rather admire her through the glasses.

"Um, help you?" Her child-like voice muttered out of her gas mask as if she was speaking with her mouth against a wall.

The man panicked for a split second before regaining his poise. He was a thread's width close to pouncing on her. "For you," he spoke with elegance as he handed her the booby-trapped bouquet with his bandaged right arm.

The girl looked at the man in a tilted gaze that translated to nothing but confusion. She took the flowers and like a dog, started digging through it. Her energy blew up with an unpinned grenade as she spotted the ticking package hidden within the bouquet. She swiveled a look towards the man. Even with her mask on, there was no doubt as to the face she was making under that matte black guise.

With a cheerful squeal, she leaped onto the man and planted her mask right on his lips.

To others, it tastes bitter, like antiseptic but to the man, it tasted like God's ass.
 
Top