I had just finished fixing a crooked painting on a wall when abut 6 people were called to attention, including me. Apparently everyone was going to be superheros.
The way we would get superpowers is by choosing from a pile of cards. Up to 5 cards could be selected. The words written on the cards would become our powers in the new world we were going to be superheros in.
You see, those cards were my Japanese flashcards. There really aren't any 'special' words because it's just normal everyday Japanese words. So this created a problem about what kind of 'powers' were available. I suppose some of the best words might be something like 'strength', 'speed', 'water power', 'electricity', 'flight', 'weight', etc. However, there was nothing really fancy like 'force field' or 'gravity' or 'laser'.
So I saw some people sitting at a round table each with stacks of cards that they were going through. I was thinking, I'll just wait until they're done picking their cards (5 people X 5 cards = 25 cards total) and then go through all the cards all at once myself. I just wanted to be methodical when doing my selection to know that I didn't miss anything and there pretty much were more than enough cards and opportunities for everyone. Just gotta be patient and creative. So I refrained myself gracefully and let them go first to be polite.
I was thinking about the cards in the pile of 6000 that I wanted in the meantime. I was very concerned with being the most helpful superhero I could be and saving lots of people. So I thought about the best possible cards in that pile of relatively normal words to achieve my goals.
(1) "Longevity" - Those other superhero's were becoming muscleheads, and even though they would be very powerful their total career lengths would likely be bound by normal human lifespan limits; they would grow old and die. However, if I had longevity I could continue to live, work, gain experience, and help people long after they were all gone. With more time I could save more people. I might not be as acutely powerful as them, but I was going for highest utility and overall number.
(2) "Intelligence" - Since my compatriots were just muscleheads I thought that I wanted to diverge from the pack and become a mind type superhero. I always felt that if I was more intelligent I could make better decisions. By filling out a role that nobody else was I could really help out my superhero teammates. With great power comes great responsibility, and making bad decisions because I was stupid is unacceptable! Intelligence could also help me figure out how to utilize my abilities to the fullest!
(3) "Prime Minister" - lolz. Okay, "longevity" and "intelligence" are beneficial, but they aren't actually going to give me enough raw power to make a difference in the world. My superhero friends were individually powerful and capable of making a difference on a small scope, however, they could only be in one place at a time fighting by themselves. I decided that to make a real difference in the world authority and scope is necessary. Unlike a guy that is strong and can fly, I as the prime minister could get secret information on criminal groups and city crime rates. With my previous intelligence boosted I'm sure that I could make better decisions to help fight corruption and evil in the country, and help people internationally too!
(4 & 5) "Talent" and "Psychic" - Well, my dream logic told me that there might be a card that gives me mental powers or psychic abilities, so I just accepted it as true. Can you imagine the corruption fighting power of a psychic prime minister? Embezzlement and cronyism begone! Talent was just raw talent. Sometimes people try hard in life, and they have the skills and abilities to succeed, but because they don't have talent it doesn't always work out. I guess the same thing could be said about luck. Talent, intelligence, and luck, these are pretty important superpowers if I think about them and any of them could have been on my 5 cards.
So with that done, I was now a mind type superhero. From the shadows I would expunge evil and corruption as the intelligent, talented, psychic mastermind prime minister.
I was so proud of myself. I politely asked the other people at the table to keep an eye out for some mind type cards for me. But one guy grunted a little annoyed.
"Oy. If I find cards like that I'm keeping them for myself. Why should I help a shit like you?"
Eh? What did he mean?
Me: "B-b-but I thought we were going to be a superhero team fighting crime together and helping lots of people. I wanted to do my best and help everyone." *teary-eyed*
3 people looked at me with gentle eyes that said, "Awww. This person is so cute but stupid."
So it turns out that the whole superhero thing was just my assumption. In reality, it seemed to be some kind of pvp free for all. We weren't going to be superheros at all in this new world and we weren't going to be saving or helping people ...
So an old friend comes up to me, places a hand on my shoulder, and says, "I'm gonna knee you in the face bitch."