Escapism

Scribbler

The Flying Man in Wonderland
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So apparently a lot of people consume media - watch tv, movies, and read to escape from reality? I never understood that. I mean, if you had a real reason to escape from reality, then wouldn't you be using your time to fix the problem in your real life instead of wasting it by consuming media? I like to consume media because it's fun, because I'm bored, because I have nothing better to do. But if I had a real problem with my life, I could not waste a single second consuming media. But apparently literally everyone tries to escape from reality except me.

And you ask me, "What if they can't change their reality?". Then I would say that's basically the same thing as giving up and hoping your problems will go away by themselves. Isn't that a terrible thing to do? Something only human trash would do? Am I being too judgmental?

I recall multiple people not believing me, thinking that I was lying when I said I didn't understand the concept of escapism. And I still don't understand why I would ever want to escape from reality, when reality is literally the most important thing. I can only feel pity for people who think that that's the only viable option; doing nothing.

What do you guys think?
 

bananapink

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Most people have a certain avoidance to something unpleasant. When life gets too busy, we all take a break as a form of relief. Others choose the extreme. For example, when they're broken-hearted they indulge in alcohol, internet etc... anything as a distraction. Very few are those who have a firm grip of themselves where they focus on what's in front of them and deal with it rather than procrastinate and think of 'what ifs'

We are humans. We seek comfort when we are hurt or stressed. If no one can provide it we turn to other things. (did I make sense?)
 

mrsimple

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I'm here to have fun. When I'm not distracting myself from this reality, I dwell on the unpleasantly finite time that remains.
 

Scribbler

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Most people have a certain avoidance to something unpleasant. When life gets too busy, we all take a break as a form of relief. Others choose the extreme. For example, when they're broken-hearted they indulge in alcohol, internet etc... anything as a distraction. Very few are those who have a firm grip of themselves where they focus on what's in front of them and deal with it rather than procrastinate and think of 'what ifs'

We are humans. We seek comfort when we are hurt or stressed. If no one can provide it we turn to other things. (did I make sense?)
Just because most people are like that, that doesn't mean it's the way it should be. If you can be better then be better. Remaining your worst self is the worst thing a person can do.
 

bananapink

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Just because most people are like that, that doesn't mean it's the way it should be. If you can be better then be better. Remaining your worst self is the worst thing a person can do.

Well, it may be self-deception but the point is that it allows us to cope. It depends on an individual how they will go from thereon. Escapism is a kind of defence mechanism, we don't know what other people feel unless we see and hear it. It's easy to say positive things from an outsider's perspective. Who doesn't want their reality to be better, the question is: How? (I'm talking about the serious case.)

I mostly hear that 'how' question from people LOL... and I admit I answered a few sarcastically which made me feel like shit later on.

I think those who deliberately not want to change (even when they can) needs a smack in the face. (these ones are the annoying case.)
 

Moonpearl

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Some problems aren't so easily fixed. Depression, suicidal urges, abusive home situations, mourning a recently dead loved one... Sometimes people really do have to wait and bide their time until their problems come to an end on their own. Sometimes they just need a temporary break from their reality to stop their brains from hurting them.
Actually, watching a film when your brain starts going down a dark place, or playing a game to ignore suicidal urges, is a healthy way of dealing with it in the heat of the moment.

Of course there are people who indulge in escapism so much that it becomes self-destructive, or they essentially aren't living at all except in a fantasy world. But don't think it's so easy to change your circumstances or "better yourself". Such people are often emotionally exhausted. They need to confront reality, yes, but they need help and support for their problems too; without it, they'll just be chewed up and spat out as soon as they try to reconnect with life.

And generally, escapism is a method of letting yourself take a break from your own mind. It's healthy and lets you recharge, so people will do it regularly when they're a bit tired from work or some personal problems that need a bit of time to iron out.
 

ArcadiaBlade

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Escapism is better than committing suicide. To those who don't experience a harsh life, people who escape from reality are the ones who have been subjected to extreme pain physical or mental.

'Oh, your only friend as a child was raped by her father and then subjected to killing herself? Welp, we don't have to escape from reality am I right? That's hardly enough to break down right?'

'Oh, did your mother died on your birthday, are we? That's fine you don't have to escape from reality because it's easily forgettable.'

Every Physical or mental you have received as a child depends on the sanity meter you have. The less you have, the more likely a person would go insane or maybe even go to suicide.

Escapism sometimes are hard to understand to people who didn't have trauma in their lives but Its more of a therapy session and a mind relaxing way of relieving someone's mental state so that one doesn't go insane. Thats my own opinion.
 

Scribbler

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Well, it may be self-deception but the point is that it allows us to cope. It depends on an individual how they will go from thereon. Escapism is a kind of defence mechanism, we don't know what other people feel unless we see and hear it. It's easy to say positive things from an outsider's perspective. Who doesn't want their reality to be better, the question is: How? (I'm talking about the serious case.)

I mostly hear that 'how' question from people LOL... and I admit I answered a few sarcastically which made me feel like shit later on.

I think those who deliberately not want to change (even when they can) needs a smack in the face. (these ones are the annoying case.)
Some problems aren't so easily fixed. Depression, suicidal urges, abusive home situations, mourning a recently dead loved one... Sometimes people really do have to wait and bide their time until their problems come to an end on their own. Sometimes they just need a temporary break from their reality to stop their brains from hurting them.
Actually, watching a film when your brain starts going down a dark place, or playing a game to ignore suicidal urges, is a healthy way of dealing with it in the heat of the moment.

Of course there are people who indulge in escapism so much that it becomes self-destructive, or they essentially aren't living at all except in a fantasy world. But don't think it's so easy to change your circumstances or "better yourself". Such people are often emotionally exhausted. They need to confront reality, yes, but they need help and support for their problems too; without it, they'll just be chewed up and spat out as soon as they try to reconnect with life.

And generally, escapism is a method of letting yourself take a break from your own mind. It's healthy and lets you recharge, so people will do it regularly when they're a bit tired from work or some personal problems that need a bit of time to iron out.
Escaping reality doesn´t automatically mean I do nothing with my life.

I need to take a break, sometimes.
Escapism is better than committing suicide. To those who don't experience a harsh life, people who escape from reality are the ones who have been subjected to extreme pain physical or mental.

'Oh, your only friend as a child was raped by her father and then subjected to killing herself? Welp, we don't have to escape from reality am I right? That's hardly enough to break down right?'

'Oh, did your mother died on your birthday, are we? That's fine you don't have to escape from reality because it's easily forgettable.'

Every Physical or mental you have received as a child depends on the sanity meter you have. The less you have, the more likely a person would go insane or maybe even go to suicide.

Escapism sometimes are hard to understand to people who didn't have trauma in their lives but Its more of a therapy session and a mind relaxing way of relieving someone's mental state so that one doesn't go insane. Thats my own opinion.
There is always a way.

Relaxing and escaping are not the same.
 

Llamadragon

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Aren't you also escaping? You could easily live by your words and change your life a little so that you're not bored, so that you find something you're passionate about, or makes the world better. You could strive to achieve something, to master something, or whatever you want really.

But here you are. Escaping boredom. If you had written "I read novels because I love it" - that's not escapism. "I read novels because I have nothing better to do" = you're not seeking out something better to do. You might not be getting crushed under your problems, but you're doing exactly the same thing, escaping a problem. Your problem is boredom.
 

ChubbyLiv

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When it comes to serious Escapism, hikikomori for example, that person needs help. I think it´s impossible to cope with it, alone.
 

Scribbler

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Aren't you also escaping? You could easily live by your words and change your life a little so that you're not bored, so that you find something you're passionate about, or makes the world better. You could strive to achieve something, to master something, or whatever you want really.

But here you are. Escaping boredom. If you had written "I read novels because I love it" - that's not escapism. "I read novels because I have nothing better to do" = you're not seeking out something better to do. You might not be getting crushed under your problems, but you're doing exactly the same thing.
You're just wrong on so many levels that I won't even take the time to explain all the ways. That's how wrong you are.
 

ArcadiaBlade

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There is always a way.

Relaxing and escaping are not the same.
Yes but escapism is the same as relaxing. More specifically, a self-therapy session. One can't say that its easy to recover from extreme emotional damage if you always been experiencing the light. Every person has a darkness, its most that some don't experience enough darkness to undergo escaping from reality.

Can one really recover that easily when not only the examples i told, facing theintense stess from school/work, the isolation, the emotional and physical pain and even the unfairness of life?

Its willpower. People with strong people can easily recover or even avoid escaping from reality are the only ones who can easily say something as you describe as 'an alternative' but what about those who doesn't have them?
 

Moonpearl

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There is always a way.

Relaxing and escaping are not the same.
Sometimes "the way" is to lie in wait and/or take a break from your own mind. That means it's time for escapism.

Finding "the way" if there is another method isn't always easy.
In the case of abuse, all abusers work by crafting the illusion for their victims that they can't escape. Most will distance their victims from friends and family that might help them, so they feel like there's no one to rely on for help. Some make their victims reliant on them for food, money, shelter... They'll also convince their victim that nobody will listen to them or help them even if they go to the authorities. They may even mess with their victim's minds so that they don't know they're being abused, they just know that they're miserable and they feel trapped.
There's also a phenomenon whereby people who have been trapped in a situation for long enough are no longer able to believe they can escape, even when offered the way out. There was an experiment that lent its name to this phenomenon... I can't find it anymore, annoyingly, but it was one where a man kept dogs captive and found they wouldn't run out even when they cage door was left open all day. You might callously call it "giving up", but that's what the brain does after years of captivity and torture.

Depression affects how the mind works too - it forces it to be as pessimistic as possible, and makes any optimistic thought a trial to achieve and a nigh impossibility to believe. It also mentally and physically drains its victim. People suffering with it may find that small tasks such as getting out of bed or brushing their teeth are incredibly difficult and sap all their energy. Resisting suicidal urges is a battle against your own brain, and a person might be spending all their mental energy just to not die. They don't have enough for anything else - that's why they need external help.

Think of depression like a little glass cage in which gravity is vastly intensified. There's a lever on the inside that will open the door. For the person inside, the gravity is so intense that they're forced to lie on the ground. With all their strength and willpower, all they can do is keep their chest raising and lowering so that they can breathe.
You, as a person outside the class cage, can wonder why they don't just reach for the lever and let themselves out. You can shout at them to do it. You can laugh at them, you can swan around showing off all the wonderful things YOU can do and lift, you can boast that YOU'D be able to get yourself out, having never experienced the conditions inside. But all that mean nothing to the person who's really inside - they have to direct all their energy to breathing so they don't die, and wait for someone else to open the cage from the outside.
 

Scribbler

The Flying Man in Wonderland
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Sometimes "the way" is to lie in wait and/or take a break from your own mind. That means it's time for escapism.

Finding "the way" if there is another method isn't always easy.
In the case of abuse, all abusers work by crafting the illusion for their victims that they can't escape. Most will distance their victims from friends and family that might help them, so they feel like there's no one to rely on for help. Some make their victims reliant on them for food, money, shelter... They'll also convince their victim that nobody will listen to them or help them even if they go to the authorities. They may even mess with their victim's minds so that they don't know they're being abused, they just know that they're miserable and they feel trapped.
There's also a phenomenon whereby people who have been trapped in a situation for long enough are no longer able to believe they can escape, even when offered the way out. There was an experiment that lent its name to this phenomenon... I can't find it anymore, annoyingly, but it was one where a man kept dogs captive and found they wouldn't run out even when they cage door was left open all day. You might callously call it "giving up", but that's what the brain does after years of captivity and torture.

Depression affects how the mind works too - it forces it to be as pessimistic as possible, and makes any optimistic thought a trial to achieve and a nigh impossibility to believe. It also mentally and physically drains its victim. People suffering with it may find that small tasks such as getting out of bed or brushing their teeth are incredibly difficult and sap all their energy. Resisting suicidal urges is a battle against your own brain, and a person might be spending all their mental energy just to not die. They don't have enough for anything else - that's why they need external help.

Think of depression like a little glass cage in which gravity is vastly intensified. There's a lever on the inside that will open the door. For the person inside, the gravity is so intense that they're forced to lie on the ground. With all their strength and willpower, all they can do is keep their chest raising and lowering so that they can breathe.
You, as a person outside the class cage, can wonder why they don't just reach for the lever and let themselves out. You can shout at them to do it. You can laugh at them, you can swan around showing off all the wonderful things YOU can do and lift, you can boast that YOU'D be able to get yourself out, having never experienced the conditions inside. But all that mean nothing to the person who's really inside - they have to direct all their energy to breathing so they don't die, and wait for someone else to open the cage from the outside.
Sigh
 

CupcakeNinja

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So apparently a lot of people consume media - watch tv, movies, and read to escape from reality? I never understood that. I mean, if you had a real reason to escape from reality, then wouldn't you be using your time to fix the problem in your real life instead of wasting it by consuming media? I like to consume media because it's fun, because I'm bored, because I have nothing better to do. But if I had a real problem with my life, I could not waste a single second consuming media. But apparently literally everyone tries to escape from reality except me.

And you ask me, "What if they can't change their reality?". Then I would say that's basically the same thing as giving up and hoping your problems will go away by themselves. Isn't that a terrible thing to do? Something only human trash would do? Am I being too judgmental?

I recall multiple people not believing me, thinking that I was lying when I said I didn't understand the concept of escapism. And I still don't understand why I would ever want to escape from reality, when reality is literally the most important thing. I can only feel pity for people who think that that's the only viable option; doing nothing.

What do you guys think?
Kid, few people have the mental strength to know and understand they can change their fates. Most think that they can't and so don't even try.

And if you can't understand escapism it just means you haven't faced anything in your life hard enough, daunting enough, to make you want to escape the situation via distractions yourself.

Either your life has been smooth sailing for the most part, no real challenges, or you're just mentally tougher than many others.

Regardless of which, you hold others to a standard. Which is wrong. Standards aren't the same for everyone because not everyone is the same type of person as you.
 
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Scribbler

The Flying Man in Wonderland
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...
Why did you ask if you don't really want to hear the answer? You asked, "Am I being too judgemental?" and the answer is "yes, you're being exceedingly judgmental and don't seem to know what you're talking about".
The seems is the really important part.
Kid, few people have the mental strength to know and understand they can change their fates. Most think that they can't and so don't even try.

And if you can't understand escapism it just means you haven't faced anything in your life hard enough, daunting enough, to make you want to escape the situation via distractions yourself.

Either your life has been smooth sailing for the most part, no real challenges, or you're just mentally tougher than many others.

Regardless of which, you hold others to a standard. Which is wrong. Standards aren't the for everyone because not everyone is the same type of person as you.
I have a sense of right and wrong, of what should and should not be done. If we cannot measure ourselves to some sort of standard then we may as well be animals.
 

Moonpearl

That Yuri Girl
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The seems is the really important part.
The "seems" is just in case you happen to be someone who's been through similar circumstances and are currently riding a high of good health, or are otherwise failing to empathise properly with other people.

Otherwise, there is no "seems".
 
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