He said that his sister’s cousin’s dog’s owner’s cousin’s brother said:

Maple-Leaf

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Whenever writing dialogue one(me) tends to write the phrase: “-s/he said” a lot.

I try to substitute it with other things like: suddenly s/he shouted: et, etc or: a mans voice rang through the room: Yada Yada...
stuff like that. But I feel it’s getting somewhat repetitive.

Should I just assume the reader will be able to tell who’s talking from what their saying and how they’re saying it? But what if the reader gets confused??? I’m a noob writer so I would like to make sure that my mediocre story, is at the very least, understandable.

Any advice?
 

LostLibrarian

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There are some "tricks" I use though some more technically versed authors might disagree.

Instead of always using "he said, she said" (though those are important and should also be used) or similar words (answered, responded, pointed out, bellowed, etc), I often use some action description during her dialogue paragraph.

"Bla Bla Bla." She scratched the back of her head in embarrassment. "Bla Bla Bla Bla Bla."

Don't know whether there is theory against it or some native speakers will find fault with it, but so far it worked fine for me. You also mention again to whom the dialogue paragraph belongs, but it isn't the usual dialogue tag.


That said, never assume the readers know who is speaking. You can skip the tag in a one-on-one conversation for one or two short exchanges ("Yes" - "No" - "Yes" - "Oh," I said. "...") but always remind the reader. A tag used too often won't really bother most readers. They kinda skip it in their heads anyway after they see the person talking. But "forgetting" who is talking right now, having to go back to re-read the last paragraphs to make sense out of it, will take your reader out of the reading experience. And that seems a lot worse to me...
 
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D

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Depends on the scene. Usually, I put synonymous words like 'blurted out', 'shouted', 'asked', 'explained', etc., whenever there's more than two people in the conversation.

If there's only two, usually, I'd put the 'he/she said' part on the first few lines, then remove it as they go, putting it again whenever necessary. The readers would have an idea who's speaking there.

But to be sure, putting distinguishing speech patterns on one character would give the reader an idea who's currently speaking.
 

Friend

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"Life is often unfair," I ejaculated in profound depth. "We cannot all have the best of the best, but we should at least never receive the worst of the worst."
 

K5Rakitan

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If you have a one-on-one dialogue going, even if there are other people present, you can drop the dialogue tags. Say two people are on the phone and a third is just nearby. We can generally assume the third isn't involved in the conversation unless the writer makes a point of including the third.
 

Anonymous_Buttfart

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250+ other words for "said"
Neutral/multi-purpose words 🙂
Acknowledged
Added
Agreed
Announced
Articulated
Asserted
Began
Blurted
Called
Commented
Communicated
Conferred
Considered
Contended
Declared
Denoted
Drawled
Emitted
Ended
Enunciated
Expressed
Interjected
Mentioned
Noted
Observed
Orated
Predicted
Pronounced
Quipped
Recited
Reckoned
Related
Remarked
Repeated
Replied
Responded
Shared
Stated
Told
Uttered
Vocalized
Voiced
Happy/excited words 😄
Approved
Babbled
Beamed
Bubbled
Chattered
Cheered
Chimed in
Chortled
Chuckled
Congratulated
Complimented
Crooned
Effused
Exclaimed
Giggled
Grinned
Gushed
Jabbered
Joked
Laughed
Praised
Rejoiced
Sang
Smiled
Thanked
Trilled
Yammered
Sad/upset words 😢
Agonized
Apologized
Bawled
Blubbered
Cried
Fretted
Grieved
Groaned
Lamented
Mewled
Moaned
Mumbled
Sobbed
Sighed
Sniffled
Sniveled
Wailed
Wept
Angry words 😡
Accused
Choked
Badgered
Barked
Bellowed
Chastised
Cursed
Demanded
Exploded
Fumed
Glowered
Growled
Hissed
Insulted
Raged
Ranted
Reprimanded
Roared
Scolded
Screamed
Screeched
Snarled
Shouted
Swore
Thundered
Vociferated
Yelled
Annoyed words 😒
Bleated
Complained
Condemned
Criticized
Groused
Grumbled
Grunted
Mocked
Rasped
Rejoined
Retorted
Scoffed
Smirked
Snapped
Whined
Frightened/pained words 😨
Cautioned
Gulped
Howled
Keened
Panted
Prayed
Quavered
Screamed
Shrieked
Squalled
Squealed
Trembled
Wailed
Warbled
Whimpered
Yelped
Yowled
Warned
Prideful words 😌
Advertised
Bloviated
Boasted
Boomed
Bossed
Bragged
Broadcasted
Crowed
Dictated
Gloated
Ordered
Prattled
Preached
Swaggered
Trumpeted
Words to express uncertainty 😕
Breathed
Doubted
Faltered
Hesitated
Lilted
Mumbled
Murmured
Muttered
Shrugged
Squeaked
Stammered
Stuttered
Trailed off
Vacillated
Whispered
Words that make fun 😛
Derided
Jeered
Heckled
Lampooned
Mocked
Mimicked
Parodied
Ridiculed
Satirized
Scorned
Spoofed
Sneered
Snickered
Taunted
Teased
Words that ask a question 🤔
Asked
Begged
Challenged
Contemplated
Guessed
Hinted
Hypothesized
Implied
Inquired
Interrogated
Invited
Mouthed
Mused
Pleaded
Pondered
Probed
Proposed
Puzzled
Repeated
Requested
Requisitioned
Queried
Questioned
Quizzed
Solicited
Speculated
Wondered
Words that give an answer 👍
Accepted
Advised
Affirmed
Alleged
Answered
Assured
Avowed
Claimed
Conceded
Concluded
Confided
Confirmed
Explained
Disclosed
Disseminated
Divulged
Imparted
Informed
Indicated
Maintained
Notified
Offered
Passed on
Proffered
Promised
Promulgated
Released
Reported
Revealed
Shared
Specified
Speculated
Supposed
Testified
Transmitted
Verified

I hope this should help a little.
 

Tejoka

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The general advice is not to use other tags like "shouted/exclaimed/avowed/..." too much. I think it's okay if you use them sparingly. But only where they're actually appropriate! Most people really don't shout or whisper that much in conversation, and using fancy words might just put off the readers. Mostly, people can skip over "he said", "she said", easier than other tags.

That said, it's also a good idea to use action beats. That also gives your readers some information on what the characters are doing besides standing around talking. It's also good to show characters' emotions through their actions. For example, if you mention that A doesn't look up from her book during the conversation, it's clear that she's distracted and not really interested in talking. So, using action beats you can get three birds with one stone. Just don't overuse them, either.
(Edit: this is often recommended by writing advice websites etc., so there isn't theory against it, more the opposite.)

Also, sometimes you can skip those if the dialogue itself makes it clear which person is speaking. The easiest example is addressing another character by name, but be careful with that, since most of the time people don't constantly address each other by name in casual conversation. But you could, for example, use some humurous appelation when it's appropriate, as part of characters bantering ("stop shooting fireballs at my paper constructs, you brute!"). Otherwise, it just depends on the context which information will tell your readers what character is speaking.
Edit: don't underestimate your readers' intelligence. Usually, they're pretty good at telling who's talking from context, if you make it obvious. At least in my experience.
 

tiaf

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00E0D8A0-94FF-43C1-969D-D46AC3CAA795.jpeg

It could be that it was posted in another thread already. But here you go again.
 

Maple-Leaf

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The general advice is not to use other tags like "shouted/exclaimed/avowed/..." too much. I think it's okay if you use them sparingly. But only where they're actually appropriate! Most people really don't shout or whisper that much in conversation, and using fancy words might just put off the readers. Mostly, people can skip over "he said", "she said", easier than other tags.

That said, it's also a good idea to use action beats. That also gives your readers some information on what the characters are doing besides standing around talking. It's also good to show characters' emotions through their actions. For example, if you mention that A doesn't look up from her book during the conversation, it's clear that she's distracted and not really interested in talking. So, using action beats you can get three birds with one stone. Just don't overuse them, either.
(Edit: this is often recommended by writing advice websites etc., so there isn't theory against it, more the opposite.)

Also, sometimes you can skip those if the dialogue itself makes it clear which person is speaking. The easiest example is addressing another character by name, but be careful with that, since most of the time people don't constantly address each other by name in casual conversation. But you could, for example, use some humurous appelation when it's appropriate, as part of characters bantering ("stop shooting fireballs at my paper constructs, you brute!"). Otherwise, it just depends on the context which information will tell your readers what character is speaking.
Edit: don't underestimate your readers' intelligence. Usually, they're pretty good at telling who's talking from context, if you make it obvious. At least in my experience.

Thanks for the advice. I probably wouldn’t have realized that I might use substitutes too much. :sweat_smile:.


Another question to anyone in particular:

Do I put the period before or after the blob emoji?
 

tiaf

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Thanks for the advice. I probably wouldn’t have realized that I might use substitutes too much. :sweat_smile:.


Another question to anyone in particular:

Do I put the period before or after the blob emoji?
If any, do it after the period. :blob_evil_two:
 

ChubbyLiv

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Going through his pockets, he panicked, "Someone, hurry, lend me a pen!"

Wanting to be helpful, she offered him her pen with a smile, saying, "Here."

(I think you could skip the world saying. Just wanted to show another example of how you can replace "she said" with "saying".)

The main point is not to put two or more people's speeches in the same paragraph, always separate them:

Going through his pockets, he panicked, "Someone, hurry, lend me a pen!" Wanting to be helpful, she offered him her pen with a smile, "Here." (I saw this many times, and it's very confusing.)
 

atgongumerki

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Very rarely does a conversation take place with tow completely still characters!
I like to describe how they move, act, gesticulate, and what happens on their faces, while they are talking.
 

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"Well then this is the first thing I have said-"

I motion to the laptop on my desk, and tap a few more keys, then finally look back at you.

"-and actually I had a joke but forgot the punchline."
 

starsmidnight

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There’s a book called Autumn by Ali Smith which I had to read for one of my classes and most of the sentences were something like:

“Is that all?” Elizabeth said.

“Not at all,” the man said.

“Then what else do you want to say?” Elizabeth said.

“You look rather pale,” the man said.

“That’s rather rude,” Elizabeth said.

and so forth. The conversations are like this throughout the entire novel. I guess in literature, anything goes 😶
 
D

Deleted member 29081

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Sometimes they're unnecessary. If you have a conversation between two people, it can be made quite clear from the flow of dialogue which one is speaking which. You can also replace "he/she said" with the action the individual committed followed by a period and then the dialogue they have to say in quotations.

e.g.,

Anne sighed. "Is that all you have to say for yourself?"
 
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