How Would You Review Your Own Story?

CupcakeNinja

Pervert Supreme
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Whilst i was jerking it to incest hentai, I noticed a notification in another tab. And wouldn't you know it, some dude reviewed a story of mine! Now, after jerking it i did go and browse through what was said, and it was not the ego-wank i SPECIFICALLY ASKED FOR. That's fine, i don't need my ego wanked more than it already is each time i gaze upon myself in the mirror.

Anyway, i did agree with one thing he said: The story is a mess. But that's because...it's meant to be? Well, the first 20 chapters were fine, they still fit the genre , then it became like your average supernatural smut romance story. But not JP ones, most are trash. I am a man of quality, i write only the spiciest of sex scenes.

That aside, its a comedy. Not a drama. Characters are made to be fun, not serious or realistic, and they are put in situations that will help them be fun. Then there was the usual nonsense of "show not tell" as if that ever means anything. The scenes are clearly written, im just not heavy on descriptions and most JP stories arent either. Show, not tell, is what i consider the most pretentious thing to say about writing. Since most of us write with JP and CN styles in mind, it won't be heavy on descriptive details. We aren't writing western-style stories. You cant compare Konosuba to Game of Thrones, know what i mean? Two entirely different style of writing. Now i ain't mad at the dude who reviewed, he was nice about it. But it got me thinking: He is but a reader, he knows only what I have deigned to show

MOVING ON~

That thought is why I'm here. How do YOU, as authors, review your own story? Because as authors we know more about the story than other people. If they say, "well this was brought up but later never mentioned again" we can say "...not YET anyway"

Because readers can only judge by what we've written so far, whereas we can judge from what we have planned. We see the whole picture, or at least we always know more than the readers will. So yeah, with your privileged knowledge as an author, pick a story of yours and review it.
 

DarkeReises

Ultimate Wankmaster, Jizzer of Universes
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Shit. They're all shit. I'd happily give them all 0 stars if that was possible. Don't know why they're at 4.5 and 5(I wrote a prologue and 10 chapters for the first one and the second one only has a prologue and one chapter...) but it's probably because there just wasn't that many readers in the first place, and the ones that did read it, liked it I guess? But they're utter shit anyways, so yeah.
 

H0LL0W

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Whilst i was jerking it to incest hentai
Sir, I find an issue with this statement. First of all.....
Capitalize the letter I in your sentence.
Now that we've gotten that out of the way we can get down to business.

If I was a reader I'd probably complain about the "where is this author going with this." I've gotten that often. I'll write a line in the third chapter and it will be extremely relevant in chapter 157 and people will be like what???? I am not good at leaving hints, and I usually go over them in author's notes at the end, which get some of the highest views in all of the chapters, so I assume the readers love that I tell them the little bits that led up to the big reveal that they never pieced together all along! But I wish I could was better at leaving hints.

If I was a reader I would probably complain about pacing. I don't know how to introduce like 20 main characters though. How does someone do that? I feel like I started something too big. That's the issue. The reader knows it, I'm starting to realize it, but I guess the allure is seeing how much better or worse it gets?
 

BenJepheneT

Light Up Gold - Parquet Courts
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i'd give my stories a pass, i guess. i can say, with confidence, that i know what i want to do with the story since the start and that my knowledge of the english language is enough to carry whatever i want to tell into the pages.

as for the end result, i'm not so sure. everyone's review would be different depending on the mood. there is no universal objective consensus towards a piece of media. if it was me, i'd give it an "okay" score.
 

CupcakeNinja

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i'd give my stories a pass, i guess. i can say, with confidence, that i know what i want to do with the story since the start and that my knowledge of the english language is enough to carry whatever i want to tell into the pages.

as for the end result, i'm not so sure. everyone's review would be different depending on the mood. there is no universal objective consensus towards a piece of media. if it was me, i'd give it an "okay" score.
same here. Most of my stories are made with entertainment in mind, I'm not going for any deep character developments or world building. It's very face-value. I just also so happen to be great at sex scenes, so BESIDES whatever generic stoy i decide to write, you also get erotica good enough to jerk to.
Sir, I find an issue with this statement. First of all.....
Capitalize the letter I in your sentence.
Now that we've gotten that out of the way we can get down to business.

If I was a reader I'd probably complain about the "where is this author going with this." I've gotten that often. I'll write a line in the third chapter and it will be extremely relevant in chapter 157 and people will be like what???? I am not good at leaving hints, and I usually go over them in author's notes at the end, which get some of the highest views in all of the chapters, so I assume the readers love that I tell them the little bits that led up to the big reveal that they never pieced together all along! But I wish I could was better at leaving hints.

If I was a reader I would probably complain about pacing. I don't know how to introduce like 20 main characters though. How does someone do that? I feel like I started something too big. That's the issue. The reader knows it, I'm starting to realize it, but I guess the allure is seeing how much better or worse it gets?
lol well isn't that the right way to do it? I did that a few times. As for characters. yeah. You gotta have only like three or four per scene and NO MORE otherwise shit gets so damn cluttery or you don't properly give them any dialogue. Learned that the hard way.

Im biased towards some characters too, so that makes it worse when they appear in scenes with other characters i DONT like as much, so they dominate the scene and I'm all like, "but i have to give these guys screen time too" and end up fucking myself over
 

Southdog

Caustic, handle with caution
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I'm harsh on my self because i want to improve. I'd say my stories could always be worked on, but then I'd never actually release anything. You can make a perfect story in your head, but if you never show it to others, then you've missed the point of a story: it's meant to be told to other people. Thats why they call it storytelling.

My stories I've released? They could be pared down some. I know I get wordy. The dialogue I write is semi-realistic, and straddling that line between clunky and humanizing. I spend a lot of time putting characters into action and having them interact, but scenery and set dressing usually comes second. My twists are obvious a mile away and I've got a habit of using the same general character archetypes (sullen men consumed by their vices, aggressive young women with fast mouths, high-class professionals and businessmen, etc.). But I'm coming at this site as someone who writes very conventionally-western style fiction (Dresden Files, Stephen King's bibliography, etc.). My style of writing is pretty incongruous with a lot of other fiction posted here, but that's fine. I don't write smut nor do I like power fantasies. I write about professionals and politics in fantastic places. In private, some folks have even comlared my style to that of a theatre manuscript. Heavy on dialogue, actions, and expressions of emotion, without a lot grounding it into the world.

But at the end of the day I just enjoy writing, and I'm hoping that my readers will also enjoy reading the stuff i poured a lot of love into. It was fun to make, and i hope its fun to consume.
 

CupcakeNinja

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Dont just write "he rubbed her breasts and fondled the garden between her legs "
With sex scenes, just saying what they do is a big no-no. Add emotion to it.
""She was the finest instrument he'd played yet, responding to each touch with the most delicious of sounds. " and then add on the specific actions. People dont just want to be fucked, they want to feel cared for. So allow the character to make them feel that way. Give them somone to love and somone to make them feel loved. That's how good sex is, its heavy on emotion. A good lover can make you BELIEVE these things are real in the moment. Even if it is just for those moments.

"Her breath hitched while he lowered her inch after excruciating in atop his engorged cock--and there were certainly a lot of inches!"

Lke there, small comments can be used too. You dont have to be too specific, readers will fill in with what they want. If you can leave things to their imagination, do so. Get bogged down with every little detail and they can't concentrate on imagining the scene themselves because they're too busy reading those details.
 

ArcadiaBlade

I'm a Lazy Writer, So What?
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Okay. This will be my detailed review on the works of Arcadia Blade.

One thing I can say to this person is that he is creative. There are some that he has made that are just those who copy and pasted from different works but he doesn't really stick to one subject but focus on the main part of his story.

Most synopis don't really line up much to what the story is about. However, he doesn't stray from the synopis that he writes but follows it step by step.

Comparing his previous works to his current works, he has a lot of improvements however it shows the differences and the ups and downs of those improvements.

The grammars he had worked on have been improving as of late however he abandons his unique writing style in order to make readers slowly understand the narrative he has been building up. The consistent uploads he had in the past have now transformed into long yet tedious process to make a compact and easy to digest storyline for readers to understand better.

The details he had been putting on in the past have been lessen yet he slowly been improving to create more of a unique story that isn't just copy paste from other people.

The characters aren't those unrealistic persona that is too unbelievable and are tailored into people who are a bit human and more down-to earth that most people even relate if you put your mind into their own situations.

However, there are downsides to such an author that isn't much difference from his fellow authors out there.

Firstly, his lack of consistency of updating.

A day, a week or even a month, you may see him just lurking place to place like a bored person yet you don't really see him talk about his update schedule clearly. As if he is constantly avoiding talking to that appoach and avoid it to the best he can.

Secondly, the details behind his writing. As you read more and more to his works, you find the slow growing suspicion that even if he gives more life to his story, you'll start to notice that he isn't really a good detail writer.

I could explain more but I don't want to take too long into writing.

Anyways, just update a chapter already!
 

BenJepheneT

Light Up Gold - Parquet Courts
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Dont just write "he rubbed her breasts and fondled the garden between her legs "
With sex scenes, just saying what they do is a big no-no. Add emotion to it.
""She was the finest instrument he'd played yet, responding to each touch with the most delicious of sounds. " and then add on the specific actions. People dont just want to be fucked, they want to feel cared for. So allow the character to make them feel that way. Give them somone to love and somone to make them feel loved. That's how good sex is, its heavy on emotion. A good lover can make you BELIEVE these things are real in the moment. Even if it is just for those moments.

"Her breath hitched while he lowered her inch after excruciating in atop his engorged cock--and there were certainly a lot of inches!"

Lke there, small comments can be used too. You dont have to be too specific, readers will fill in with what they want. If you can leave things to their imagination, do so. Get bogged down with every little detail and they can't concentrate on imagining the scene themselves because they're too busy reading those details.
this sounds like something the troll under the local bridge would tell to curious, unsuspecting children and I'm all for it. bookmark'd
 

CupcakeNinja

Pervert Supreme
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Okay. This will be my detailed review on the works of Arcadia Blade.

One thing I can say to this person is that he is creative. There are some that he has made that are just those who copy and pasted from different works but he doesn't really stick to one subject but focus on the main part of his story.

Most synopis don't really line up much to what the story is about. However, he doesn't stray from the synopis that he writes but follows it step by step.

Comparing his previous works to his current works, he has a lot of improvements however it shows the differences and the ups and downs of those improvements.

The grammars he had worked on have been improving as of late however he abandons his unique writing style in order to make readers slowly understand the narrative he has been building up. The consistent uploads he had in the past have now transformed into long yet tedious process to make a compact and easy to digest storyline for readers to understand better.

The details he had been putting on in the past have been lessen yet he slowly been improving to create more of a unique story that isn't just copy paste from other people.

The characters aren't those unrealistic persona that is too unbelievable and are tailored into people who are a bit human and more down-to earth that most people even relate if you put your mind into their own situations.

However, there are downsides to such an author that isn't much difference from his fellow authors out there.

Firstly, his lack of consistency of updating.

A day, a week or even a month, you may see him just lurking place to place like a bored person yet you don't really see him talk about his update schedule clearly. As if he is constantly avoiding talking to that appoach and avoid it to the best he can.

Secondly, the details behind his writing. As you read more and more to his works, you find the slow growing suspicion that even if he gives more life to his story, you'll start to notice that he isn't really a good detail writer.

I could explain more but I don't want to take too long into writing.

Anyways, just update a chapter already!
h
Okay. This will be my detailed review on the works of Arcadia Blade.

One thing I can say to this person is that he is creative. There are some that he has made that are just those who copy and pasted from different works but he doesn't really stick to one subject but focus on the main part of his story.

Most synopis don't really line up much to what the story is about. However, he doesn't stray from the synopis that he writes but follows it step by step.

Comparing his previous works to his current works, he has a lot of improvements however it shows the differences and the ups and downs of those improvements.

The grammars he had worked on have been improving as of late however he abandons his unique writing style in order to make readers slowly understand the narrative he has been building up. The consistent uploads he had in the past have now transformed into long yet tedious process to make a compact and easy to digest storyline for readers to understand better.

The details he had been putting on in the past have been lessen yet he slowly been improving to create more of a unique story that isn't just copy paste from other people.

The characters aren't those unrealistic persona that is too unbelievable and are tailored into people who are a bit human and more down-to earth that most people even relate if you put your mind into their own situations.

However, there are downsides to such an author that isn't much difference from his fellow authors out there.

Firstly, his lack of consistency of updating.

A day, a week or even a month, you may see him just lurking place to place like a bored person yet you don't really see him talk about his update schedule clearly. As if he is constantly avoiding talking to that appoach and avoid it to the best he can.

Secondly, the details behind his writing. As you read more and more to his works, you find the slow growing suspicion that even if he gives more life to his story, you'll start to notice that he isn't really a good detail writer.

I could explain more but I don't want to take too long into writing.

Anyways, just update a chapter already!
this is EXACTLY the kind of reply i wanted to see. An actual review by the author. Honest and fair.
this sounds like something the troll under the local bridge would tell to curious, unsuspecting children and I'm all for it. bookmark'd
Smh im giving you the secrets to great ero and you call me a troll. Hmph! You try to be nice, you try to help people, and you're labeled a bridge-dwelling creature of fable. Figures
 

LoliGent

The Lolicon Gentleman
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May 21, 2021
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My review is pretty much: It exists.

It wasn't meant to exist. It was meant to see how many clicks a weird title and weird premise would get. I didn't figure anyone would want to read a story of a girl who can't go to the toilet without her male best friend next to her. It was so ridiculous, and that was the point. I wanted to see if it would actually get people to click. The original book cover was nothing more than some random anime girl I found on image search with the title in Arial font, another clickbaity test. That's all it was, just an experiment to collect data.

And it worked too well. Many people clicked, many people replied, and many people wanted more. I just had to keep it going.

What can I actually say? The story, it's there. It is what it is. It is not a masterpiece. It is full of grammar errors, typos, and syntax issues. I'm sure there are plot holes and divergent changes over the long run due to its pantser nature. I just pushed it on a whim, whatever I could muster, before it all become too much to handle and I had to end it.

There's nothing more than I, the author, can actually review because of its very nature other than it's real, it exists, it's part of this world now, and I have to live with the fact that I rendered it into existence.
 

CupcakeNinja

Pervert Supreme
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My review is pretty much: It exists.

It wasn't meant to exist. It was meant to see how many clicks a weird title and weird premise would get. I didn't figure anyone would want to read a story of a girl who can't go to the toilet without her male best friend next to her. It was so ridiculous, and that was the point. I wanted to see if it would actually get people to click. The original book cover was nothing more than some random anime girl I found on image search with the title in Arial font, another clickbaity test. That's all it was, just an experiment to collect data.

And it worked too well. Many people clicked, many people replied, and many people wanted more. I just had to keep it going.

What can I actually say? The story, it's there. It is what it is. It is not a masterpiece. It is full of grammar errors, typos, and syntax issues. I'm sure there are plot holes and divergent changes over the long run due to its pantser nature. I just pushed it on a whim, whatever I could muster, before it all become too much to handle and I had to end it.

There's nothing more than I, the author, can actually review because of its very nature other than it's real, it exists, it's part of this world now, and I have to live with the fact that I rendered it into existence.
Holy fuck. That was you? Jesus hell. My first thought was "who would even read shit like this?" And then I read that shit. Twas good shit
 

H0LL0W

Well-known member
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Jun 17, 2021
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Im biased towards some characters too, so that makes it worse when they appear in scenes with other characters i DONT like as much, so they dominate the scene and I'm all like, "but i have to give these guys screen time too" and end up fucking myself over
Confession time.
there have been characters I end up liking later on that were supposed to die in the original draft, but then I let them live.
And then I rewrite the entire story around them living.....
Creating extra work....
So yeah, don't worry about your extra dialouge, its not that bad in the scope of things haha.
 

The_Everdistant_Utopia

Mapmaker | Writer | Lorekeeper
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Dec 23, 2018
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203
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133
I wonder, does it even classify as story?

In a summing up, one could describe it as 'this is my OC do not steal' fodder.

Letting aside the validity of roleplaying gargle as veritable writing, one could marvel at how mind numbingly boringly this story plays out. The inconsistency of the story and indecisiveness of the author in balancing narrative and dialogue adds to the sense that the story was written by a complete hack.

The briefness of chapters seem appealing if you're one to enjoy a quick read, but they're painfully inconclusive and fail to deliver the most faint hint of satisfaction with their vague and often erratic cut off points.

That aside, the author does like to wear it in their sleeves that they couldn't or wouldn't care to bother doing the most basic of proofreads as the text is mired with mistakes even a mouth breather would spot as they wrote. Let alone the mood and tone that swings faster and with more strength than a dying rabid dog flailing for their life.

A good time waster, if anything. Emphasis on waster.

Jokes aside, it's just generic RP stuff, innit? I am fully aware it isn't good, but I'm also fully aware it isn't worth putting the effort to make it good.
 
D

Deleted member 45782

Guest
if had to review my story, probably would comment on:
- plotholes. things that had at beginning of story but some big holes dropped and there's not much done to explain what happened or conclude it.
- grammar. would point at all mistakes. past/present tense issue in some places. long sentences that become run-offs.
- story itself and whether if its unique and pulls me in, how well it flows, etc.
- why there still has been no update in years and no finish end to the story.

tear into it to find what still needs to be stitched, if it ever does get stitched. mostly left in pile of dust somewhere, at least for now.
 
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