Mordrake
Member
- Joined
- Feb 23, 2021
- Messages
- 4
- Points
- 18
I would like feedback as well - https://www.scribblehub.com/series/391039/ghost-rider-in-twilight/
tried reding mine https://www.scribblehub.com/series/...on-lord-in-another-world-with-my-skill/stats/Give me your story's link and I will give you my feedback and prediction per title above. By popular, I mean reaching 800+ readers on this site (or other places too, if you want) and/or getting into trending. However, don't expect any very detailed opinion because I'm not really much of a critic -- you can visit TheTrinary's or Zirrboy's thread for that. Works best if you haven't written many words or posted on anywhere yet.
Note: Not guaranteed 100% accurate prediction (I'm not a psychic lol). My feedback is derived from my observation and experience as an author for around six years. Also, just because the story have the right genres and tags, doesn't mean it'll become a hit. There are more nuances than that. Lastly, I only give predictions up to 30 chapters.
By the way, feel free to check my novel :
The Magic Lumberjack
Kane — who was once a mighty ax saint and master blacksmith — fell from his glory after completing his vengeance. He fled to a faraway kingdom but was killed by an invading demon in an unfortunate event. For an unknown reason, his journey somehow hasn’t ended. Kane found himself in...www.scribblehub.com
While Villainess genre is one of the trending genres in SH, yours is rather too plain to reach popular. Evil protagonists are quite common nowadays. The first chapter is fine but nothing special. Granted, this is just my quick impression of your novel, so take that with a grain of salt.Hello! I would really appreciate it if you could take a look at my story. Thank you very much!
Basic Premise:
Girl reincarnates into novel, but she's evil.
Edi: Hi, I posted my 30th chapter today, so I totally understand if you don't want to take a look. However, I would appreciate it if you could check out my premise and tags, and tell me how long you think it'll take to reach your definition of popular :)
Unfortunately, I’m an Evil Villainess
I was Lady Valentina Avington, the beautiful, wicked, and narcissistic villainess of a novel. When I recalled memories of my past life, I decided I wanted everything the heroine had. Using my knowledge of the future, I became a fake saint, the successor to my house, the future queen, and...www.scribblehub.com
Same as above, your story is very plain despite the ever so popular OP Isekai genre. The protagonist feels like a generic Gary Stu judging from the synopsis and first chapter. You should create (or advertise) a more unique Gary Stu protagonist at least. Story quality-wise, it's pretty decent so, there's that. You still have a chance of getting into trending.Try mine, it goes like this:
The MC became a king at a young age, due to his responsibilities, challenges, and problems, he wasn't able to experience a normal child and teenage life. However, one night, while defending his country, he almost died at battle, but before he knew it, a has already summoned him before he could die.
The God offered the MC a chance to live an entire new life in another world where he can freely do what he wasn't able to. However, he discovered that his identity and everything about him is not as simple as it seems.
You can read more of it here: https://www.scribblehub.com/series/376458/a-kings-reincarnation/
The emphasis on the rarely seen culture (Indian) is nice, but that alone isn't enough to gain readers. The premise seems to be basic based on your synopsis. It also doesn't have what most BL readers want: romance. That brings us to the lack of Male Lead mentions which any typical BL story would have. Sure, it might have Chinese cultivation style, but that's not important for them. So, basically, your novel is like a normal reincarnation novel except it's BL at quick glance.Here's mine. Thank you.
The Diabolic Cultivator Thief
After living a 'carefree life' and dying a tragic death, Advik thought that everything ended for good. But life is full of surprises and heaven likes to play with everyone. Hence, when he was ready to meet Yama in the netherworld, he opened his eyes in a place called Lost...www.scribblehub.com
ThanksThe emphasis on the rarely seen culture (Indian) is nice, but that alone isn't enough to gain readers. The premise seems to be basic based on your synopsis. It also doesn't have what most BL readers want: romance. That brings us to the lack of Male Lead mentions which any typical BL story would have. Sure, it might have Chinese cultivation style, but that's not important for them. So, basically, your novel is like a normal reincarnation novel except it's BL at quick glance.
The prose is quite well-written. The pacing is a bit slow, but that's just my nitpick.
Below 100 readers by chapter 30.
I assume you meant Twin Flames? Because that's the only story that has below 30 chapters. The rewrite doesn't have first chapter yet, so I'll focus on the old one instead.Its on mah signature.
Traditional Portal Fantasy is outdated for a long time which means your story might not thrive here. The title style is antiquated and that's bad for attracting readers. The synopsis and the cover are fine. The first chapter is... confusing at least for the first half. I'm pretty much on the same boat with TheTrinary so, I'll give my additional opinion: the first half should have been in the Prologue chapter instead of first chapter. If your intention was to hook readers with action, well too bad readers won't really care about fancy action performed by some not-yet-established characters. Personally, my interest piqued only at the mention of Underland since it raises questions. Maybe you should build up the scene first before jumping into action.
For a Litrpg, the premise is sure different than the usual in a good way. It does make me wanna read it after reading the synopsis, but I don't know for others, though. I can't say the same when looking at the title, however, because it's dull and vague. Anyway, the first chapter is really great. I like how you world-build while keeping the balance between infodumping and under explaining.Here's my story: Out of this world
Thank you!I'm back from my long hiatus. I'll continue giving predictions now. Too many stories that I need to go through, so I'll just review the ones that are still active.
While Villainess genre is one of the trending genres in SH, yours is rather too plain to reach popular. Evil protagonists are quite common nowadays. The first chapter is fine but nothing special. Granted, this is just my quick impression of your novel, so take that with a grain of salt.
How long does it take to reach popular? I based it solely on readership (800 readers is the minimum), so in my honest opinion, I predict it will need 6-12 months, assuming you're posting regularly, or maybe 2-4 times hitting trending.
Same as above, your story is very plain despite the ever so popular OP Isekai genre. The protagonist feels like a generic Gary Stu judging from the synopsis and first chapter. You should create (or advertise) a more unique Gary Stu protagonist at least. Story quality-wise, it's pretty decent so, there's that. You still have a chance of getting into trending.
Sorry, I genuinely didn't see your post (either my browser didn't load it or it's my brain's fault). I hope you don't mind the late feedback.Hello, would love to hear your thoughts: https://www.scribblehub.com/series/441987/shattered-soul/
Premise: relatively standard Xianxia with a gender-bender twist.
Guy dies in the real world and is reincarnated in a Xianxia world as a girl. He/she has a physically weak body and suffers from common asthma-like attacks (I think that's what I describe?). He/she is eventually bought by a brothel where he/she is able to succeed due to his/her past knowledge of music and eidetic memory. Some things happen and he/she is recruited to a Sect and thus begins the Xianxia.
(This describes the 0th Arc, which has been posted).
Shattered Soul
I am born with memories of a past life, one which grants me an omniscient view of the cliches of the world. But will that knowledge help me navigate this Xianxia world?www.scribblehub.com
No problem. I think it was because my message was under review by moderators because it had links in it (even though they linked back to scribblehub, something that should probably be fixed).Sorry, I genuinely didn't see your post (either my browser didn't load it or it's my brain's fault). I hope you don't mind the late feedback.
Nothing new with the premise but still good enough, plus you can't go wrong with Gender Bender and Girls Love. The prose is good and paced nicely. All in all, I think your story shows promise. I do have concern that it's a bit too dark for GB and GL readers -- I'm not sure, though. The title also could be improved further to attract more readers, maybe something like this: Shattered Soul: A Xianxia Girls Love Story.
150-400 readers by Chapter 30.