Does anyone want to review my writing? I always feel a lot of shortcomings, especially in the language style that is less natural and narrow vocabulary.
1. I just wrote 3 chapters, is the story interesting enough to continue?
2. I want you to suggest an appropriate title.
3. Pointing out the position of the sentence that is not natural and I should be able to fix it.
Does anyone want to review my writing? I always feel a lot of shortcomings, especially in the language style that is less natural and narrow vocabulary.
1. I just wrote 3 chapters, is the story interesting enough to continue?
2. I want you to suggest an appropriate title.
3. Pointing out the position of the sentence that is not natural and I should be able to fix it.
This isn’t meant to discourage, but it needs a lot of work, especially in terms of grammar.
1) The grammar issues are distracting enough that I’d be spending more time trying to correct sentences than being able to focus on the story.
2) The title alone, “Misunderstanding of characters in the Naruto world” doesn’t make sense. Perhaps “Misunderstood Characters in Naruto” might make more sense, but I haven’t read enough to make the determination as to whether that’s what you were going for with this story.
3) There are too many things to point out.
What I’ll point out is just in terms of the first line in the synopsis.
“I was a genius and own a high tech company with 200.000 employees in my past life, yetsomuchdonation and good deeds that I made, I reincernated as a little brat??”
- verb tense issues being one problem here.
- using period instead of comma in 200,000. Pretty sure that’s done in other languages like French, but English it’s a no no.
- spelling mistakes, such as in reincarnated.
- there’s really no need for two question marks.
One way to rewrite it might be: I was a genius who owned a high tech company with 200,000 employees in my past life. Despite all the contributions I made to society, be it through donations or good deeds for the betterment of mankind, I reincarnated as a little brat.
Don't really worry about grammar and spelling mistakes. I make them all the time. Till the time you have idea, you must write it. Only stop when your idea is too complicated to write, in which case, write many practices and then continue.
You only need to do one thing and that be practice and just write freely? Grammar mistakes? Just look back 5 years later and cringe at how horrible you are when you first started(I did and almost died from cringe). Just know that you are free to write and comments will help you out with edits and stuff so you can rewrite them anytime. However, just have fun and give passion to writing(At least you got a good start rather than me who was so full of motivation and ready to fix mistakes whenever I can, only to end up demotivated and decided to become a lazy writer who basically updates at random and even at worst times).
If you want to have a professional career at writing novels, that would mean you need to work harder and properly fix mistakes but since its just a webnovel, just have fun writing and do your best. Do not be depressed at negative comments(at least you write something than them who just write negative comments and don't even write at all).
Have fun and let me procrastinate on my work reading your nove-I mean good luck!
Before I start chiding, I mean, commenting. Let me ask some questions.
Do you really have this many chapters at your disposal? I mean, only three? And it's already two to three weeks ago since the last update.
But seriously, although I'm a procrastinator myself and write occasionally while sometimes not continue writing the story at all, I at least, keep three to five scheduled chapters. I scheduled it to five days per update, so that's means I have two to three weeks (15-25 days to be exact) before writing another batch of chapters. And I don't post a story if it still hasn't reached chapter 20.
I mean, there's nothing wrong with that. At first, I also did the exact that. Posting half-assed incomplete story which I can't continue anymore. Perhaps because I can't fill the in-between the beginning to the ending, I'm a panser tbh, and I don't have something like an outline or anything like that.
But really. It's not whether the story interest other people to read it, don't ask other people about that. First of all, did you enjoy it? Did you enjoy writing it and felt that you can conquer the world with your stories satisfied with what you write? If you do enjoy it, no matter if it's bad or doesn't catch the interest of other people and readers ..., you just keep doing it, keep writing it.
You probably learn in school, that the book title should be in the capital except for the conjunction and connection. I can't see a problem with the title aside from that, nowadays there's a lot of long-title trends from Japan. And this much is not that long.
> About the grammar ...
I don't dare to comment on this problem because English is my third language, and my grammar is also not something I am proud of. However, a slight tip from a fellow scribbler with poor grammar. Try to install Grammarly or ProWritingAid or some of the add-on in your browser or something. It'll help, like a lot.
And then there's a formatting issue.
The woman's face turned small and yellow? "What's wrong with you dattebayo ?? The yellow haired boy shook his body.
You see, something like the passage above is not neat at all.
First of all, the direct speech and quotation. It is confusing when you put two characters into a single block with a quotation. I skimmed on your story so I don't quite get this part.
Rule 1.
Use double quotation marks to set off a direct (word-for-word) quotation.
Correct: "I hope you will be here," he said. Incorrect: He said that he "hoped I would be there." (The quotation marks are incorrect because hoped I would be there does not state the speaker's exact words.)
Rule 2a.
Always capitalize the first word in a complete quotation, even mid-sentence.
Example:
Lamarr said, "The case is far from over, and we will win."
Rule 2b. Do not capitalize quoted material that continues a sentence. Example:
Lamarr said that the case was "far from over" and that "we will win."
Rule 3a.
Use commas to introduce or interrupt direct quotations.
Examples:
He said, "I don't care."
"Why," I asked, "don't you care?"
This rule is optional with one-word quotations. Example:
He said "Stop."
Rule 3b.
If the quotation comes before he said, she wrote, they reported, Dana insisted, or a similar attribution, end the quoted material with a comma, even if it is only one word.
Examples:
"I don't care," he said. "Stop," he said.
Rule 3c.
If a quotation functions as a subject or object in a sentence, it might not need a comma.
Examples:
Is "I don't care" all you can say to me? Saying "Stop the car" was a mistake.
Rule 4.
Periods and commas ALWAYS go inside quotation marks.
Examples:
The sign said, "Walk."
Then it said, "Don't Walk," then, "Walk," all within thirty seconds.
He yelled, "Hurry up."
Rule 5a.
The placement of question marks with quotation marks follows logic. If a question is within the quoted material, a question mark should be placed inside the quotation marks.
Examples:
She asked, "Will you still be my friend?"
The question Will you still be my friend? is part of the quotation.
Do you agree with the saying, "All's fair in love and war"? The question Do you agree with the saying? is outside the quotation.
Rule 5b.
If a quoted question ends in midsentence, the question mark replaces a comma.
Example:
"Will you still be my friend?" she asked.
Rule 6.
Quotation marks are used for components, such as chapter titles in a book, individual episodes of a TV series, songs from a Broadway show or a music album, titles of articles or essays in print or online, and shorter works such as short stories and poems.
It is customary in American publishing to put the title of an entire composition in italics. Put the title of a short work—one that is or could be part of a larger undertaking—in quotation marks.
A "composition" is a creative, journalistic, or scholarly enterprise that is whole, complex, a thing unto itself. This includes books, movies, plays, TV shows, newspapers, magazines, websites, music albums, operas, musical theater, paintings, sculptures, and other works of art.
Example:
Richard Burton performed the song "Camelot" in the 1960 Broadway musical Camelot.
Although the word is the same, "Camelot" the song takes quotation marks because it's part of a larger work—namely, a full-length show called Camelot.
Rule 7.
Use single quotation marks for quotations within quotations.
Example:
Dan said: "In a town outside Brisbane, I saw 'Tourists go home' written on a wall.
But then someone told me, 'Pay it no mind, lad.' "
Note that the period goes inside both the single and double quotation marks. Also note that, as a courtesy, there is visible space between adjacent single and double quotation marks.
Rule 8a.
Quotation marks are often used with technical terms, terms used in an unusual way, or other expressions that vary from standard usage.
Examples:
It's an oil-extraction method known as "fracking."
He did some "experimenting" in his college days.
I had a visit from my "friend" the tax man.
Rule 8b.
Never use single quotation marks in sentences like the previous three.
Incorrect:
I had a visit from my 'friend' the tax man.
The single quotation marks in the above sentence are intended to send a message to the reader that friend is being used in a special way: in this case, sarcastically. Avoid this invalid usage. Single quotation marks are valid only within a quotation, as per Rule 7, above.
Rule 9.
When quoted material runs more than one paragraph, start each new paragraph with opening quotation marks, but do not use closing quotation marks until the end of the passage.
Example:
She wrote: "I don't paint anymore.
For a while, I thought it was just a phase that I'd get over. "Now, I don't even try."
Maybe that's that ...,
... and you should probably try outlining your story. I did say that I am a panser, but I still follow the general premise of the story and what I should write. The beginning, ongoing conflict, and climax. I have a clear grasp of them. I see that your story is a comedy, but it won't hurt you the author to have some clear goal on what your story trying to tell to the world.
For the lack of vocabulary, it is easy to overcome this. Just read more books! When you found some unfamiliar word that you have no idea at all, google translate it to your language.
It's like watching anime ..., at first, you know nothing about Japanese Language but when you watch them over and over, you'll surely get familiar with their language. You may already know some easy greeting word such as nakani nakani dashite ikeh ikkeh kimochi, dame yamete kudasai; sorry, I mean, ohaiyo, konichiwa, oyasuminasai, tadaima madofuka or something along those lines.
The more you read English literature, be it novel or other kinds of books ..., the more you grasp the vocabulary. That's it if you want to expand your vocab. Reading more of these printed books will also help you familiar with the syntax and grammar, after all, it's an edited book. So there might be fewer mistakes in the grammar and misspell words.
The more you read English literature, be it novel or other kinds of books ..., the more you grasp the vocabulary. That's it if you want to expand your vocab. Reading more of these printed books will also help you familiar with the syntax and grammar, after all, it's an edited book. So there might be fewer mistakes in the grammar and misspell words.
This. English is my third or fourth language (next to German I barely remember and Russian I learned for two years only) and it is certainly not perfect, but I can say with confidence the sheer ammount of (properly edited) English literature I consumed helped me greatly in grasping the language.
Does anyone want to review my writing? I always feel a lot of shortcomings, especially in the language style that is less natural and narrow vocabulary.
1. I just wrote 3 chapters, is the story interesting enough to continue?
2. I want you to suggest an appropriate title.
3. Pointing out the position of the sentence that is not natural and I should be able to fix it.
My writing style is probably the worst on this site, but my story is still pretty successful, so I wouldn't worry about that. If you have fun writing, continue - that's all that matters.
I'm not good with advices but I know that only by continuing you can improve. The more errors you see, the more improvements you will make. Many will point out those mistakes some can be disheartening but there are those that are really helpful as long as you are open to changes... as aspiring authors, we are naturally blind to our story's faults.
This isn’t meant to discourage, but it needs a lot of work, especially in terms of grammar.
1) The grammar issues are distracting enough that I’d be spending more time trying to correct sentences than being able to focus on the story.
2) The title alone, “Misunderstanding of characters in the Naruto world” doesn’t make sense. Perhaps “Misunderstood Characters in Naruto” might make more sense, but I haven’t read enough to make the determination as to whether that’s what you were going for with this story.
3) There are too many things to point out.
What I’ll point out is just in terms of the first line in the synopsis.
“I was a genius and own a high tech company with 200.000 employees in my past life, yetsomuchdonation and good deeds that I made, I reincernated as a little brat??”
- verb tense issues being one problem here.
- using period instead of comma in 200,000. Pretty sure that’s done in other languages like French, but English it’s a no no.
- spelling mistakes, such as in reincarnated.
- there’s really no need for two question marks.
One way to rewrite it might be: I was a genius who owned a high tech company with 200,000 employees in my past life. Despite all the contributions I made to society, be it through donations or good deeds for the betterment of mankind, I reincarnated as a little brat.
My writing style is probably the worst on this site, but my story is still pretty successful, so I wouldn't worry about that. If you have fun writing, continue - that's all that matters.
My writing style is probably the worst on this site, but my story is still pretty successful, so I wouldn't worry about that. If you have fun writing, continue - that's all that matters.
Sahida dear no one is going to tell you to stop. (Or in my case be too stupid to stop) We all look back on our old chapters and cringe. I myself and thinking of rewriting my earlier chapters even though they seem to be fine for me. The only metric you should put yourself to is asking yourself whether you enjoy the writing at all.
Hey! This is a good time to learn about writing. But to learn about writing you need to practice. And this is the perfect opportunity to do so. So, yes, write! Write more till you feel you have told the story you wanted to tell.
Heck, I think your story is doing way better than mine, and I'm not stopping. I don't think you should either. It is your time, and your dedication that is needed to learn - do so. Happy writing!
Mate, I have to tell you, your work is good. The fact that you have 31 readers and still 2 chapters in is already good. I'm 5 chapters in yet I only have 13 readers (Thank you readers). For a new Author, you're doing pretty well. No, I'm not jealous, but rather very optimistic. I'm not confident in my own story, I always think "Is the plot stupid?" or "Will people hate this?", the important thing is to do what you want. If you think the story is stupid, don't bend to others' will unless it's really needed. Seeing your story's rankings, you're in the good. It's good to ask people to review your work, but remember to be prepared to see some mean words. Yes, my words are confusing hahaha
There are grammar checkers online. Free ones. Some may be of questionable quality and have word count limits, but they are there. As for improving grammar, there's usually only a few proven ways to git gud, such as repeatedly reading well edited, published works to get a feel for proper grammar, and trying a hand at imitating styles from works that you like before branching out into one that's more 'you'.
it's because I'm not confident.
