I need feedback for the synopsis of a slice of life novel that I'll be working on

ElliePorter

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Alternate title: I want to die but how can i eat what i want, If I do that?

Synopsis: Matsumoto Chiaki is a 23 year old woman working at one of most largest firms in Japan. Unsatisfied with the repetitive and tiring process that she does at her job. She thinks about contemplating suicide to be free but also realizes at the end that she can't eat what she wants, if she's dead!

Tags would be: Comedy, Slice of life
 

K5Rakitan

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I recommend including a question or three in your synopsis to entice the reader. Example:
 
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Deleted member 45782

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Some grammar errors.
Alternate title: I want to die but how can i eat what i want, If I do that?

Synopsis: Matsumoto Chiaki is a 23 year old woman working at one of the most largest firms in Japan. Unsatisfied with the repetitive and tiring process that she does at her job. She thinks about contemplating suicide to be free but also realizes at the end that she can't eat what she wants, if she's dead!

Tags would be: Comedy, Slice of life
You have an incomplete sentence in the middle.

Maybe try:
Unsatisfied with her repetitive and tiring job, she contemplates suicide. But then reality strikes her — she can't eat when she's dead!
 

ElliePorter

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Some grammar errors.

You have an incomplete sentence in the middle.

Maybe try:
Unsatisfied with her repetitive and tiring job, she contemplates suicide. But then reality strikes her — she can't eat when she's dead!
I will go by your synopsis then. Thanks for pointing out the errors though.
 
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