I already have so many of these i can't explain.
Wait no is that the ultra max 90000 made in the 90s but is considered a modern device due to the people having negative intelligence.
Wait a minute. My hair color suddenly turned white, am i the protagonist?
This shit is too unrealistic i may be a webnoveld protagonist.Lets goo!!!!
Edge lord life here i come
Wair her hair turnned white does that main she is a harem member of mine or am i a harem member of her?
Wait his forehead looks like Obama's.
Lets goo!!! I finally killed that fucking annoying bastard who was speaking like the protagonist!
Gojo groans in pain as he tries crawl out but ofcourse i picked him up by the head and throwed him in the basketball hoop.
"Get dunked on!!"
Just like kamaza said i value gender equality.
Taylor Swift's breathing got rough as she looked down and let her guard down.
I didn't miss that moment to quickly use my gumo gumo no rocket to punch her in the groin.
"How...?How did i lose?,"she asked while barely keeping her eyes open.
"Skill issue," i said calmly as i unfollowed her social media accounts..
Taylor pupils dilated as she was too shocked.
"I see. Your one of those," she said with a taunting voice.
"Shut up. Bitch!"
i slapped her as i carried her to torture chamber.
“Sun jin woo!?
No way the one who leveld up solo?”
“Kim dokja!?
The master con artist.”
Lee Min-ho looked down at Kim Soo-hyun as he walked on the stage.
"You have been doing drugs?,"Kim Soo-hyun asked to Lee Min-ho.
“So what... Huh? Is it wrong being
a little elevated when life itself is a trip?” Lee Min-ho flicked his perfectly coiffed hair, striking a dramatic pose as if he were about to break into an impromptu K-drama monologue. The audience gasped. Kim Soo-hyun narrowed his eyes.
“You’re high right now?!” he shrieked, grabbing Lee Min-ho’s collar like a furious chaebol heir confronting his long-lost twin.
Lee Min-ho giggled. GIGGLED. Like a schoolgirl who just saw her crush take off his blazer in slow motion.
Kim Soo-hyun’s face turned red. “You are literally at the Baeksang Arts Awards! You—”
“I am an artist, Kim Soo-hyun,” Lee Min-ho purred, wagging a condescending finger. “Artists don’t follow rules. We transcend them.” He attempted to levitate. He did not succeed.
Security started approaching, but Lee Min-ho dramatically pointed at them. “DO NOT TOUCH ME! I AM A NATIONAL TREASURE!” He turned back to Kim Soo-hyun. “And you. You were my friend. My brother. But now... you are nothing but a corporate puppet.”
“I AM LITERALLY JUST SOBER,” Kim Soo-hyun barked. “THAT DOESN’T MAKE ME A PUPPET.”
“Tell me, Soo-hyun,” Lee Min-ho whispered, stepping closer. “Have you ever licked a flamingo?”
Kim Soo-hyun took a step back. “Wh—what?”
“That’s what I thought,” Lee Min-ho nodded sagely.
The audience was dead silent. A single cameraman was sobbing. Somewhere, a baby coughed.
And then, in one swift motion, Lee Min-ho ripped off his tuxedo to reveal a full sequined jumpsuit underneath. The crowd screamed as he sprinted toward the stage edge.
“STOP HIM!” one security guard yelled.
But it was too late.
Lee Min-ho launched himself into the audience like an EXO member on steroids, belly-flopping onto a startled Song Hye-kyo’s lap.
Kim Soo-hyun fell to his knees. “WHY ARE YOU LIKE THIS?!” he howled into the void.
Lee Min-ho stood up, blew a kiss to the horrified crowd, and declared:
“I AM KOREA'S BEYONCÉ.”
And then he disappeared into the night.
Christmas at the BTS dorm started like any normal holiday—until Jungkook decided to inject liquid nicotine into a gingerbread cookie “for science.”
“WHO ATE THE COOKIE?!” RM screamed when he found Jimin vibrating on the ceiling like a human light fixture.
“I CAN SEE TIME,” Jimin wheezed.
“You’ve ruined Christmas,” Jin sighed, stirring a pot of what was supposed to be mashed potatoes but now smelled like burning rubber.
Meanwhile, Suga was missing. Gone. Vanished. His last known words were, “I’m gonna go talk to the rats behind the 7-Eleven. They owe me money.”
J-Hope, wrapped in Christmas lights like a human burrito, was rolling on the floor whispering, “I AM THE GHOST OF CHRISTMAS SWAG.”
V was fully naked except for a Santa hat, standing on the balcony, screaming at passing cars. “WHERE IS THE NORTH STAR? I MUST FIND BABY JESUS.”
“Taehyung, get inside,” RM pleaded.
“I CAN SMELL COLORS.”
Suddenly, a CRASH.
Everyone turned.
Jungkook had accidentally set the Christmas tree on fire after trying to “give it a little trim” with a blowtorch.
Jin lost it. “WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?!”
“I HAVE IMPULSE CONTROL ISSUES,” Jungkook yelled back, trying to put out the flames by punching them.
Jimin was still on the ceiling. “DO YOU GUYS THINK SANTA DOES K-DRAMA CAMEOS?”
The fire alarm went off.
A random old man kicked down the door.
“WHO THE Fuck” J-Hope started.
“I AM SAINT NICHOLAS,” the man growled.
Everyone froze.
Santa pulled out a cigarette, lit it on Jungkook’s flaming tree, took a deep drag, and said, “Y’all got Henny?”
Jimin fell from the ceiling.
Suga walked back in, holding a live raccoon. “This is Bobby. He’s part of the family now.”
Jin’s eye twitched. “I am going to stab all of you.”
Then, out of nowhere, an ostrich ran through the front door.
No one owned an ostrich.
No one questioned the ostrich.
Santa took another drag of his cigarette and said, "Merry fucking Christmas.”
And then he vanished.
And that’s why BTS is banned from celebrating Christmas.
That was the random bts one shot that i wrote but never published it online.