Post Your Synopsis & Get Feedback

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Kuroinamida91

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Current work: Bōru ni negai, which is a dragon ball XenoVerse/legends mix fanfic.

Here's the synopsis:
An abused Otaku Tsundere gets her wish granted and starts her new easygoing Academy life. Lewds happen, and she's forced into a relationship with a lilac haired devi! This isn't the isekai life she read about?!
Trunks can't wrap his mind around Rhuda, his tsundere girlfriend--but one things for sure, nobody else can have her!
"I'll never love someone like you!"
"You don't have to love me, but you're mine!"
--Xenoverse 2 <<less
 

Bartun

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Dec 9, 2020
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Title:
Nowhere to Run

Sypnosis:
Nina is a young priestess that just started her journeys in the Highlands, in a faraway land.
But everything falls apart when greater forces are scheming and unknown men are suddenly after her.
She will have no other choice but to resort to her wits, make unexpected allies, and navigate her way through unforgiving lands in order to survive.
Will she be up to the task?
 

Ark-

Active member
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Jul 8, 2019
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Hello everyone, so long story short, I'm working on a story called "The Tower of Desire" (Temp title), I have two types of stories using the same title, These are the main difference:

Version 1. Reincarnation type:
Synopsis: Johnathan felt no fury or hatred for his passing at the hands of a mugger and a stab wound to the chest, it is below him to curse at the card that is given to him, but reincarnating into a different world is one that even he will find baffling, especially when the world is filled attribute, Skill, Title and more, and not to mention the bizarre world technological skill.

Version 2. Transmigration Type:
Synopsis: Johnathan didn't know what happened, one time, in a lapse of judgment, he fell asleep during his train home, the next, he awoke to a deafening announcement
"Challenge one has started, please read the instruction carefully"

Which one do you guys find more interesting? I have around 27K words written down for both of them (1 prologue and 3 chapters worth of content), just from those synopses alone, which one do you guys find moe interesting
 

ElijahRyne

Not that Lazy…
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Aug 12, 2021
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I am writing a new story called The Mist of Love. Here is the synopsis, don’t hold back in your feedback!


One dark night, a person was hit by a car that was speeding down the road. From the collision, a small mist of blood, Bloody, gained consciousness. They travel the streets, yet all the people who Bloody passes by ignore Bloody.

They watch and wander the streets as the years go by. Slowly, Bloody grows stronger by breathing in the essence of the moon, and smarter as they watch the humans. They feel lonely, and yearn for a human life. That is until one day when Bloody gains a new ability, transformation.

Ecstatic, Bloody tries to turn themselves into a human, yet when they do, they become a child. Only to turn back into the mist when they tried to sleep. What happens next? Will Bloody succeed in their goal? Stay tuned to find out!
 

Yi_San

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Sep 21, 2021
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Story name: EVER DESTINY: ANGEL AND DEMON.

Synopsis:

They were two lonely souls.
One was the reason for everything ......
While the other found 'him' as the reason.
His blood red eyes looked up to the sky.. His sharp gaze pierced through realms. But, he couldn't get a glimpse of him...
After a moment, demonic power surged from him. He crawled up from the hell and wreaked havoc in the worlds he saw. He became hated, feared and cursed by billions of people..
All was for...




Teaser:

*His birth was the most majestic. In the highest realm, taking up millions and billions of years, he was finally formed. With his enchanting blue eyes, he hatefully stared at the ferocious demon..
"What do you want actually? "

Finally he spoke!!!
He spoke to me!!

The demon said nothing. Just looked at him lovingly. His mind overflowing with satisfaction..

"I only had one last wish, Yi "

He slowly said.Suddenly he moved backwards.. The corrosive thick demonic aura surged from his body.

The angel's pupil constricted.
He rushed to the demon and caught him by hand.

The demon weakly laid in his hands. Cracks appeared in his demon spirit body..

"I LOVE YOU LITTLE YI !!!"

That was his last words...

'To die from your hands..that was my final wish Yi. I am sorry.. If i get a chance without this cursed destiny, i will openly pursue you. But that will never happen. It is also good to never love me. You won't be sad if i disappear forever.. Right?? "

His soul scattered..
In his place, a black hole appeared..

Slowly, very slowly, he reached with his hands...

Millions of billions of years passed....

Finally, The memories in the black hole ended.

Suddenly, he cried...
He cried in heart wrenching pain....

"Is it truly late??? "

He roared...



Is it truly late??
Read the story to know more..😁
I am writing a new story called The Mist of Love. Here is the synopsis, don’t hold back in your feedback!


One dark night, a person was hit by a car that was speeding down the road. From the collision, a small mist of blood, Bloody, gained consciousness. They travel the streets, yet all the people who Bloody passes by ignore Bloody.

They watch and wander the streets as the years go by. Slowly, Bloody grows stronger by breathing in the essence of the moon, and smarter as they watch the humans. They feel lonely, and yearn for a human life. That is until one day when Bloody gains a new ability, transformation.

Ecstatic, Bloody tries to turn themselves into a human, yet when they do, they become a child. Only to turn back into the mist when they tried to sleep. What happens next? Will Bloody succeed in their goal? Stay tuned to find out!
This is good. I guess there will be cute moments with bloody kid?

Note: i am a beginner too😁 i also have a synopsis down there.please help me out👩‍🦳👩‍🦳
Hello everyone, so long story short, I'm working on a story called "The Tower of Desire" (Temp title), I have two types of stories using the same title, These are the main difference:

Version 1. Reincarnation type:
Synopsis: Johnathan felt no fury or hatred for his passing at the hands of a mugger and a stab wound to the chest, it is below him to curse at the card that is given to him, but reincarnating into a different world is one that even he will find baffling, especially when the world is filled attribute, Skill, Title and more, and not to mention the bizarre world technological skill.

Version 2. Transmigration Type:
Synopsis: Johnathan didn't know what happened, one time, in a lapse of judgment, he fell asleep during his train home, the next, he awoke to a deafening announcement
"Challenge one has started, please read the instruction carefully"

Which one do you guys find more interesting? I have around 27K words written down for both of them (1 prologue and 3 chapters worth of content), just from those synopses alone, which one do you guys find moe interesting
i am feeling more interested in transmigration synopsis...
I am writing a new story called The Mist of Love. Here is the synopsis, don’t hold back in your feedback!


One dark night, a person was hit by a car that was speeding down the road. From the collision, a small mist of blood, Bloody, gained consciousness. They travel the streets, yet all the people who Bloody passes by ignore Bloody.

They watch and wander the streets as the years go by. Slowly, Bloody grows stronger by breathing in the essence of the moon, and smarter as they watch the humans. They feel lonely, and yearn for a human life. That is until one day when Bloody gains a new ability, transformation.

Ecstatic, Bloody tries to turn themselves into a human, yet when they do, they become a child. Only to turn back into the mist when they tried to sleep. What happens next? Will Bloody succeed in their goal? Stay tuned to find out!
This is good. I guess there will be cute moments with bloody kid?

Note: i am a beginner too😁
 
Last edited:

killwrites

Need motivation
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Sep 11, 2021
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Story name: EVER DESTINY: ANGEL AND DEMON.

Synopsis:

They were two lonely souls.
One was the reason for everything ......
While the other found 'him' as the reason.
His blood red eyes looked up to the sky.. His sharp gaze pierced through realms. But, he couldn't get a glimpse of him...
After a moment, demonic power surged from him. He crawled up from the hell and wreaked havoc in the worlds he saw. He became hated, feared and cursed by billions of people..
All was for...
First impression is that it's a pretty confusing synopsis. What is your MC's name? And it's too vague, if you give such a general description I have no idea what your story is even about. Romance? Cultivation (i'm assuming it's this one)?

well, just my opinion. i'm also new here lol, cheers!
 
D

Deleted member 45782

Guest
Title:
Nowhere to Run

Sypnosis:
Nina is a young priestess that just started her journeys in the Highlands, in a faraway land.
But everything falls apart when greater forces are scheming and unknown men are suddenly after her.
She will have no other choice but to resort to her wits, make unexpected allies, and navigate her way through unforgiving lands in order to survive.
Will she be up to the task?
Not bad.
Hello everyone, so long story short, I'm working on a story called "The Tower of Desire" (Temp title), I have two types of stories using the same title, These are the main difference:

Version 1. Reincarnation type:
Synopsis: Johnathan felt no fury or hatred for his passing at the hands of a mugger and a stab wound to the chest, it is below him to curse at the card that is given to him, but reincarnating into a different world is one that even he will find baffling, especially when the world is filled attribute, Skill, Title and more, and not to mention the bizarre world technological skill.

Version 2. Transmigration Type:
Synopsis: Johnathan didn't know what happened, one time, in a lapse of judgment, he fell asleep during his train home, the next, he awoke to a deafening announcement
"Challenge one has started, please read the instruction carefully"

Which one do you guys find more interesting? I have around 27K words written down for both of them (1 prologue and 3 chapters worth of content), just from those synopses alone, which one do you guys find moe interesting
You need PERIODS. First synopsis sounded better and I got an idea of the story more than the second one. But then I read on and on without stopping because there is no break. Your one sentence is better divided into several sentences. Makes it much easier to read and less run-ons. Read your sentence aloud without stopping (no periods, no stop). If it starts to feel like you are talking without breathing and the words bleed together, thats when you know you need to split your sentences.
I am writing a new story called The Mist of Love. Here is the synopsis, don’t hold back in your feedback!


One dark night, a person was hit by a car that was speeding down the road. From the collision, a small mist of blood, Bloody, gained consciousness. They travel the streets, yet all the people who Bloody passes by ignore Bloody.

They watch and wander the streets as the years go by. Slowly, Bloody grows stronger by breathing in the essence of the moon, and smarter as they watch the humans. They feel lonely, and yearn for a human life. That is until one day when Bloody gains a new ability, transformation.

Ecstatic, Bloody tries to turn themselves into a human, yet when they do, they become a child. Only to turn back into the mist when they tried to sleep. What happens next? Will Bloody succeed in their goal? Stay tuned to find out!
Slightly confused a bit until I learned Bloody is name of protagonist. Your synopsis is much better! Smoother flow than previous ones, and has something that makes you actually interested in the story. I see you improved a lot in your synopses. :3 And you got nice hook at end too! Well done.
Story name: EVER DESTINY: ANGEL AND DEMON.

Synopsis:

They were two lonely souls.
One was the reason for everything ......
While the other found 'him' as the reason.
His blood red eyes looked up to the sky.. His sharp gaze pierced through realms. But, he couldn't get a glimpse of him...
After a moment, demonic power surged from him. He crawled up from the hell and wreaked havoc in the worlds he saw. He became hated, feared and cursed by billions of people..
All was for...




Teaser:

*His birth was the most majestic. In the highest realm, taking up millions and billions of years, he was finally formed. With his enchanting blue eyes, he hatefully stared at the ferocious demon..
"What do you want actually? "

Finally he spoke!!!
He spoke to me!!

The demon said nothing. Just looked at him lovingly. His mind overflowing with satisfaction..

"I only had one last wish, Yi "

He slowly said.Suddenly he moved backwards.. The corrosive thick demonic aura surged from his body.

The angel's pupil constricted.
He rushed to the demon and caught him by hand.

The demon weakly laid in his hands. Cracks appeared in his demon spirit body..

"I LOVE YOU LITTLE YI !!!"

That was his last words...

'To die from your hands..that was my final wish Yi. I am sorry.. If i get a chance without this cursed destiny, i will openly pursue you. But that will never happen. It is also good to never love me. You won't be sad if i disappear forever.. Right?? "

His soul scattered..
In his place, a black hole appeared..

Slowly, very slowly, he reached with his hands...

Millions of billions of years passed....

Finally, The memories in the black hole ended.

Suddenly, he cried...
He cried in heart wrenching pain....

"Is it truly late??? "

He roared...



Is it truly late??
Read the story to know more..😁
Figure out whether you want to do a short vague description of your story with a hook or just have a scene as the hook. Otherwise its too much jammed into the synopsis, bit confusing and lost of interest from the readers. Had to reread it slowly again to understand it. Maybe just have your teaser only.

Remove the "Read more" at the end. Wordy. You don't have to tell your readers, if they really wanted they would have already done so.
 
Last edited by a moderator:

GreenHexagon

Thinker of thoughts, reader of books.
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synopsis: The worlds didn't know what to do with them. The first rejected them. The second ignored them. The eighth blessed them.
They were Omega.
 

Yi_San

New member
Joined
Sep 21, 2021
Messages
17
Points
3
Not bad.

You need PERIODS. First synopsis sounded better and I got an idea of the story more than the second one. But then I read on and on without stopping because there is no break. Your one sentence is better divided into several sentences. Makes it much easier to read and less run-ons. Read your sentence aloud without stopping (no periods, no stop). If it starts to feel like you are talking without breathing and the words bleed together, thats when you know you need to split your sentences.

Slightly confused a bit until I learned Bloody is name of protagonist. Your synopsis is much better! Smoother flow than previous ones, and has something that makes you actually interested in the story. I see you improved a lot in your synopses. :3 And you got nice hook at end too! Well done.

Figure out whether you want to do a short vague description of your story with a hook or just have a scene as the hook. Otherwise its too much jammed into the synopsis, bit confusing and lost of interest from the readers. Had to reread it slowly again to understand it. Maybe just have your teaser only.

Remove the "Read more" at the end. Wordy. You don't have to tell your readers, if they really wanted they would have already done so.
Understood. Thankyou
 
D

Deleted member 45782

Guest
synopsis: The worlds didn't know what to do with them. The first rejected them. The second ignored them. The eighth blessed them.
They were Omega.
There's really not much on here. Don't even know the character or their goal/journey/mission through this story. Needs some more description actually.
 
Joined
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Alright, how about this:

Edward, a regular guy, is transported to another world at the wrong time and place. Slowly, he adapts, paves his way, and faces whatever misfortune awaits.
 
D

Deleted member 45782

Guest
Alright, how about this:

Edward, a regular guy, is transported to another world i the wrong time and place. Slowly, he adapts, paves his way, and faces whatever misfortune awaits.
Not interested. No hook. Nothing that sparks curiosity with what goes on next in the story. You didn't give enough details to make the story stand out. That sentence basically summarizes your whole story, which many isekai stories already have, so it doesn't really make it stand out among the others.
 
Joined
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Messages
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Not interested. No hook. Nothing that sparks curiosity with what goes on next in the story. You didn't give enough details to make the story stand out. That sentence basically summarizes your whole story, which many isekai stories already have, so it doesn't really make it stand out among the others.
Thank you. That seems about right. I wasn't looking to stand out (the title does that, sort of). The synopsis is pretty much a summary, a placeholder.
 

Inflamebawdy

Chaotic lewd enby. They/them
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I don't know if anyone will respond to this bit oh well also this story isn't currently on scribblehub still trying to fine tune it.

Title: Din world
Synopsis:
An LGBT furry story of a group of individuals in a sci-fi fantasy world of magic and kingdoms trying to live on this unforgiving world ruled by magic hierarchy. Will they be able they be able to live their lives the way they seem fit, or will they be forced to bend the knee to ensure their goals are met?

⚠️ Lots of smut and gore in my story ⚠️
 
D

Deleted member 45782

Guest
I don't know if anyone will respond to this bit oh well also this story isn't currently on scribblehub still trying to fine tune it.

Title: Din world
Synopsis:
An LGBT furry story of a group of individuals in a sci-fi fantasy world of magic and kingdoms trying to live on this unforgiving world ruled by magic hierarchy. Will they be able they be able to live their lives the way they seem fit, or will they be forced to bend the knee to ensure their goals are met?

⚠️ Lots of smut and gore in my story ⚠️
Your first sentence is a bit mouthful, it is best to split your sentence into two.

Just a general advice to others as well:
It isn't always about cramming everything into one sentence. A synopsis isn't just that. It should be more than a one sentence line of your story's summary. Most times (unless you primarily targeting a specific audience that already knows what they want and getting into), you need to give a bit more details into your story to attract readers. Give a general idea of a story, not too much but enough to entice the reader to sorta get the idea what the plot is about, whose the character or protagonist they're going to be reading and maybe even self-insert into, etc.

I'm not great at explaining so let me reference @Muddy's advice: They're pretty good with their advice.
A good synopsis will tell potential readers why they should invest time in your story. That means it will often answer at least one, sometimes two or three of these questions:
  • Who is your protagonist, and why should I care about them?
  • What are they trying to achieve, and why should I care about that?
  • What is preventing them from achieving their goal?
  • What sets this story apart from the dozens of stories with a similar premise?
 

Moon36

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Post your story's synopsis here if you want feedback on it from others. Can be a synopsis of a story idea you have in mind, or a synopsis of a story you already have published on ScribbleHub.

This is to help many of us who wish to improve our synopsis in terms of grammar, making it flow smoother, identifying synopsis's weaknesses, if the synopsis we have is a good fit for our story, etc.

When providing feedback, please explain your reasons on why you feel the synopsis is lacking and provide suggestions on how it can be improved.

* Synopsis refers to Synopsis you see on ScribbleHub.
* This is not reviewing your whole story or its chapters, just the Synopsis itself. Saves time and straightforward how to improve your synopses.

Keep in mind, that a good synopsis is one that hooks the reader into wanting to continue reading on more about your story.

Thanks, I really need advice. Oh yeah, could you try to create a title for me?

Title: Cruelty

Synopsis
It was a distant memory. Distant, yet she remembered it so vividly. Mother was smirking as she playfully told the youngest one of for commenting on Aunty Emma's weight. The girl chuckled a bit, as a smile found a way onto her usually cold face. She looked a the stars with cloudy eyes... reminiscing over her past. Oh how she wished those days could've lasted. But sadly, all good things have to come to an end.

(Hello there, this is the first story I've ever written, so don't expect too much. I'll try to post, but I can't give any guarantees. Also, if you find any mistakes, tell me. Thx.)
Genre
Action, Adventure, Fantasy, Historical, Mature, Romance, Tragedy
Tags
Alchemy Antihero Protagonist Army Building Artifact Crafting Beautiful Female Lead Cannibalism Clever Protagonist Conflicting Loyalties Demi-Humans Demon Lord Demons Empires Human Experimentation, Human Weapon ,Magical Technology, Master-Servant Relationship, Multiple POV, Mythical Beasts, Slave Protagonist, Sword And Magic , Twisted Personality, Unique Weapons, Unrequited Love, Weak to Strong
 

Paul_Tromba

Happy little accident
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Jan 29, 2020
Messages
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After being framed for the use of necromancy Nero was banished from his hometown and the great magic academy. Having nowhere else to go he set off, only to get lost in the destroyed Imperial city ruins and end up in a labyrinth. After a month of fighting in the labyrinth, he found an ancient ruin that contained magic inscriptions he had never seen before. One of which was a summoning circle. Having grown lonely due to the lack of human contact Nero decides to use it to summon a servant for him to talk to. Though in the process of doing so he accidentally summoned the hero from another world. Now what?
 

KittraMcBriar

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May 25, 2021
Messages
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Ooh yes I'll bite

For my story "Lunarborn"

------

Once she was the Tyrant Empress. The one who made rivers run red with blood. The one whose name was poison to speak.
But now she’s been Reset, her memories broken, her power lost. Reborn under the night sky into the Realm of Solastrad, where time of birth is everything. As a Lunarborn in a world ruled by those born under the sun, Vi is forced to depend completely on her new Solarborn master. For the blood she needs to survive. For shelter. For protection from the people who hate her for what she was—the people who remember. But there’s more to General Khavad than the rumors whisper, and he wants more from her than just the physical energy he feeds off of.

As Vi struggles to figure out whether her new master hates or loves her, one thing quickly becomes clear—of all his weapons, she’s the deadliest.
 

SakeVision

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 30, 2021
Messages
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Long Dong is a young cultivator whom everyone underestimates! "That boy has no power!" his seniors say. Little do they know that his resolution will not break so easily!

"I"ll show you all, and build a harem of jade beauties!" exclaimed the young man, pointing his fist at the moon.

"Misha, calm down, do you want to fail another year?"

"I don't care, as long as I have this demonic power!" Long Dong whips out a pack of over-the-counter codeine, leaving his friend in shock and awe.

And thus a cultivation journey of eastern european delinquent begins!
 
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