Rise of an Empire - LCD

[lonelydimension]

A place where you can discuss chapters and stuff.

It's my first time writing a 'fantasy' so to speak, so if there is anything i could work on please let me know.

Rise of an Empire

Mikael, a former arrogant rich playboy from an empire far away, was given a mission by his father to complete a trade deal as a representative of the family. Pirates had attacked his ship, leaving him stranded on a continent he never knew existed. For ten years, he had become...

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thanks for stopping by, i guess.

 

[Ram5]

The clouds floating around, with the two suns shining down on him.

V-ing required to be or a verb before it, for example: The clouds were floating around with the two suns glared shining down on him.

“What’s so funny huh? You know that this must be done! You offended people that you know both you and I can’t handle!”

I don't know about other but when you joined both that and this next to each other, it's like you are very lacking of vocabulary, I am sorry if you feel offended.

And I agree with the comment, who's Brian? Does he there also to kill the MC?