The Yuri Writing Help Room (18+)

ZombieMaster14

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Hey, new author here. I am just started writing a yuri fanfic where the protagonist is isekai and was told to make a harem by a goddess. I am unsure of how many girls I should put in the harem. I want the harem to have at least 6 members not including MC of course. However, I am not sure if I should lower the number or increase it.
 

Moonpearl

The Yuri Empress
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Hey, new author here. I am just started writing a yuri fanfic where the protagonist is isekai and was told to make a harem by a goddess. I am unsure of how many girls I should put in the harem. I want the harem to have at least 6 members not including MC of course. However, I am not sure if I should lower the number or increase it.
Any more and you'll probably struggle to give all the characters enough depth and romantic development. It might be a struggle with 6 as it is.
 

Cipiteca396

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Hey, new author here. I am just started writing a yuri fanfic where the protagonist is isekai and was told to make a harem by a goddess. I am unsure of how many girls I should put in the harem. I want the harem to have at least 6 members not including MC of course. However, I am not sure if I should lower the number or increase it.
You shouldn't expect your readers to remember more than seven characters at once. So if your main character(1) has six love interests, there won't be room for any meaningful side characters. Your readers will be too busy trying to remember which girlfriend was supposed to be doing what to remember that unimportant edgy dude who keeps burning down villages and enslaving people or something.

To me, three is a pretty comfortable number. However, you can increase this by making two of them sisters/twins/deeply connected. The audience will remember them as a pair instead of a single person. You can't do that multiple times though, or it'll break immersion.
Unless you have a plot reason for why there are so many cute twins around who are also willing to date the same lesbian. But that feels really... Forced. No free will? Also hard to justify. (Or maybe you can pair the girls off romantically? These two are dating each other on the side, and you can be sure the audience will remember that.)

Depending on what you're writing, it might actually be possible to raise the number. But it's really gonna need some effort on your part.
 

ZombieMaster14

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You shouldn't expect your readers to remember more than seven characters at once. So if your main character(1) has six love interests, there won't be room for any meaningful side characters. Your readers will be too busy trying to remember which girlfriend was supposed to be doing what to remember that unimportant edgy dude who keeps burning down villages and enslaving people or something.

To me, three is a pretty comfortable number. However, you can increase this by making two of them sisters/twins/deeply connected. The audience will remember them as a pair instead of a single person. You can't do that multiple times though, or it'll break immersion.
Unless you have a plot reason for why there are so many cute twins around who are also willing to date the same lesbian. But that feels really... Forced. No free will? Also hard to justify. (Or maybe you can pair the girls off romantically? These two are dating each other on the side, and you can be sure the audience will remember that.)

Depending on what you're writing, it might actually be possible to raise the number. But it's really gonna need some effort on your part.
I plan on having some of the harem members date each other while also dating the MC too. I find it weird that in most harem stories I read the harem is only interested in the MC only and have zero interest in each other. I mean if they're going to share the same person and have a full-blown relationship with them then I don't see why they don't have sex with each other or go on dates while the MC is busy doing stuff like saving a village or fighting some guy hell-bent on conquering the world.

Oh, I'm also thinking about having two members of the harem be sisters but not twins. Do you think the audience will remember them as a pair or just as individuals? I'm still debating whether to do it or not. I mean wouldn't it feel forced if made two that are slightly different from each other fall in love with the same woman and are willing to share her?
 
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Cipiteca396

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I mean wouldn't it feel forced if made two that are slightly different from each other fall in love with the same woman and are willing to share her?
It's definitely weird to date the same person as your sister. Just having both sisters be gay is a little weird. Things like that are excusable individually, but the more oddities that stack up, the harder that gets.


As for whether they would be a pair or individuals, it depends. Some sisters are so different from each other you'd never guess they were related. Some are basically twins, even though they're years apart.

Writing a harem, you probably want to make them seem different to cover more types and attract readers who have different interests. That's the main appeal of (written) harem after all. 'Gotta catch em all.' Which naturally leads to the catch 22: sister is a type. It makes sense to have a younger and an older sister for a harem.

Usually that sort of case is justified by having the older sister be the doting type, and have her follow the younger into the harem to make sure she stays safe. I'm not too fond of that situation, but it's not the most offensive thing I've read.
The bonus to that is the sisters don't actually have to agree to share the mc. One of them may not have any interest in her at all. The dynamic of their relationship could be entirely focused on the actual love interest's antics. "Oh, did she really do that?"-"She did, and now you have to do something about it."-"Oh no, this one's all you."

Back to the main point, the pair vs individual thing... The key to that is making them interchangeable. If you talk about one, the other is automatically included in the audience's perception. That means less characterization for them as individuals, which isn't fun, but more room for other characters. So if you want to avoid that, just make them distinct (the fun option), or if you want that, always pair them up and make sure they never act as individuals (the practical option).
go on dates while the MC is busy
*fist pump* Another win for poly. :blob_evil:
 

Elveos

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I'm a new author as well, and I wanted to ask how do you write a slow building romance between girls? I'm having difficulty on how to differentiate the building friendship of my protagonist and another companion of hers, and her growing romance with the love interest.

Also regarding the pair and individuality, it really depends on how you write them. If they're often together or the other somehow frequently gets roped in when another is involved, it is normal for people to view them as a pair. If you want them to be viewed individually, the best thing I can think of is having them have distinct characteristics or differences that make the readers view them separately.

For the sharing bit, Cipiteca already said an answer, there is also the sibling rivalry troupe. It's not a favorite of mine, but it could work as a gag of them having a sense of rivalry fighting for the MC's affection. If it feels forced, I recommend the reasons they fell in love with the MC to differ, everyone falls in love differently, whether it be slowly or at first sight. Having one join the harem instantly or quite quickly and another to slowly fall in love with the MC would help with that.
 

ZombieMaster14

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Thank you Cipiteca396 and Elveos for your help. I now have a better idea of how I want the MC harem to go. I'm still not sure if I should change the number of the harem but I'm not going to worry about that. For now, I'm just going to focus on the relationship of the harem instead, and if I do add another member to the harem or not then so be it.
 

LadyClassical

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I’ve never written GL before and want to try my hand at it! (I’ve written a lot of BL and straight sex.) In the one-shot I want to write, two lifelong best friends attend a Christmas party and decide to try something…not so platonic. But I don’t know how to get started. Both women are outgoing, party girls, and in their early twenties. I didn’t want this to go too far (not past Ao3’s M rating) so I don’t want them to go as far as oral sex, but I definitely wanted it to get steamy, with some clothes coming off. Fingering wouldn’t be out of the question. Neither is shy so a lot is on the table. Obviously since this is impromptu they wouldn’t have any sex toys. But they’re in the guest room of her brothers house and he’s gay so they could possibly get their hands on some lube.
That is actually very helpful @Ai-chan
How long do they last each time? just a rough timespan is fine.
For my two cents? It depends. Mine is only like one or two days and then after that it’s light enough to go without (but with a panty liner changed regularly to keep from stinking, sorry if TMI). So basically it all comes out at once for me 😅 but I feel lousy the first day, like you feel when you have a little cold. Period pains feel kind of like gas but not exactly. Mine messes with my digestion so I don’t actually know if I’m having cramps or gas 🤦🏼‍♀️ but some women have it WAY worse. All I can say is my own personal experience.
 
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AiLovesToGrow

I write silly erotica
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I’ve never written GL before and want to try my hand at it! (I’ve written a lot of BL and straight sex.) In the one-shot I want to write, two lifelong best friends attend a Christmas party and decide to try something…not so platonic. But I don’t know how to get started. Both women are outgoing, party girls, and in their early twenties. I didn’t want this to go too far (not past Ao3’s M rating) so I don’t want them to go as far as oral sex, but I definitely wanted it to get steamy, with some clothes coming off. Fingering wouldn’t be out of the question. Neither is shy so a lot is on the table. Obviously since this is impromptu they wouldn’t have any sex toys. But they’re in the guest room of her brothers house and he’s gay so they could possibly get their hands on some lube.
If you want to try for a hot scene but without, say, going all the way, try one of the girls is very hesitant and makes a rule. "Underwear stays on, no touching inside underwear." This give a guideline while also allowing for tension in the scene as both women clearly want to go further, but they restrain themselves. Can even go into how they don't even take off shirts or pants for most of the scene, groping into blouses and drifting into pants. I would even go so far as to make it so neither of them cum, the sexual tension should have an element of clam jamming as one is about to reach inside panties and the other stops her. "Not...yet" she says, swallowing her own need as she stumbled back into the bed. "Please." This opens up the avenue for the following chapters to be about how both girls are passionately thinking about that time, in a constant state of horny while they are in class at uni or grinding against the counter at the fast food place they work. Then, after a few chapters of sexual frustration and finding they can't wait any longer, they find themselves in a public place, throw themselves into a closet, and now they are tearing clothing off in wild passion, both of them wildly trying to keep their moans and screams quiet in the public place.
 

LadyClassical

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If you want to try for a hot scene but without, say, going all the way, try one of the girls is very hesitant and makes a rule. "Underwear stays on, no touching inside underwear." This give a guideline while also allowing for tension in the scene as both women clearly want to go further, but they restrain themselves. Can even go into how they don't even take off shirts or pants for most of the scene, groping into blouses and drifting into pants. I would even go so far as to make it so neither of them cum, the sexual tension should have an element of clam jamming as one is about to reach inside panties and the other stops her. "Not...yet" she says, swallowing her own need as she stumbled back into the bed. "Please." This opens up the avenue for the following chapters to be about how both girls are passionately thinking about that time, in a constant state of horny while they are in class at uni or grinding against the counter at the fast food place they work. Then, after a few chapters of sexual frustration and finding they can't wait any longer, they find themselves in a public place, throw themselves into a closet, and now they are tearing clothing off in wild passion, both of them wildly trying to keep their moans and screams quiet in the public place.
Normally, I’d totally agree! And this is good advice. But this was meant to be a one-shot, so there are no future chapters 😅 It’s meant to be a little steamy Christmas-themed sort of thing. So I wouldn’t be able to leave anyone hanging at the end of the scene.
 

AiLovesToGrow

I write silly erotica
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Have it happen right at first, be the story's foreplay, then as the Christmas season gets closer, they both decide they will unwrap their gift at like a mall.
 
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