Verbal bias?

TrashyHuman

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Whenever I enter a chat room on a forum like this, I can't help but notice how a lot of people have their own, unique-like styles of expression, making me feel like even without changes in tone, or any particular verbal ticks like "uhhhh... This... So" etc, it is possible to express one's personality through text.
Whether or not it is possible to write such that it'd be easy to discern two different individuals behind the text, I am certain, but understanding what kind of person is behind what text, is something I'm not sure is possible.
To elaborate, assume that the following text is written by two distinct and real individuals, not a lizard person like myself pretending to be them:
I saw the teacher scold the student for being late. The teacher was so angry, I could see the veins in his throat and his face was all red. I thought he was scary. The student who was being shouted at was so pale in fright
And
The teacher yelled at the student for being late. It was scary, seeing the teacher act like this. He barked like a bulldog, there was saliva everywhere... The student was so scared, his face became as white as a sheet of paper
tell me what do you think of each of the narrators: their personalities and such, but do so in spoilers, and don't look at the answers of others before you answer yourself! Cool?
Oh, and I want to see your first impressions, so don't overanalyse anything
 

SailusGebel

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I will try. But don't expect much from me. If I did something wrongly, do correct me.

Perhaps it's due to me not being a native English speaker, but I don't see much difference. Both don't like the teacher. Both are way too expressive. That's pretty much it.
 

BenJepheneT

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Whenever I enter a chat room on a forum like this, I can't help but notice how a lot of people have their own, unique-like styles of expression, making me feel like even without changes in tone, or any particular verbal ticks like "uhhhh... This... So" etc, it is possible to express one's personality through text.
Whether or not it is possible to write such that it'd be easy to discern two different individuals behind the text, I am certain, but understanding what kind of person is behind what text, is something I'm not sure is possible.
To elaborate, assume that the following text is written by two distinct and real individuals, not a lizard person like myself pretending to be them:

And

tell me what do you think of each of the narrators: their personalities and such, but do so in spoilers, and don't look at the answers of others before you answer yourself! Cool?
Oh, and I want to see your first impressions, so don't overanalyse anything
the first narrator knows his job. He's not amazing at it but he gets the job done on par with his pay. He's told to narrate what the POV is thinking and he did as he's told.

The second narrator is now getting chewed off by his boss because of the sudden pause in the middle. He's facing imminent poverty due to his inability to follow instructions such as "don't drag the reader out of the immersion by spoiling it with your own reactions, much less verbal ones". Even if he did it, he did so with no style nor wit. He sucks at his job. Now he's digging sewer grates and cleaning monuments at the local park as a double job.

TL;DR: First guy felt adequate. Second guy felt like a tryhard who isn't good at trying hard.
 

Chestnutriceeee

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Whenever I enter a chat room on a forum like this, I can't help but notice how a lot of people have their own, unique-like styles of expression, making me feel like even without changes in tone, or any particular verbal ticks like "uhhhh... This... So" etc, it is possible to express one's personality through text.
Whether or not it is possible to write such that it'd be easy to discern two different individuals behind the text, I am certain, but understanding what kind of person is behind what text, is something I'm not sure is possible.
To elaborate, assume that the following text is written by two distinct and real individuals, not a lizard person like myself pretending to be them:

And

tell me what do you think of each of the narrators: their personalities and such, but do so in spoilers, and don't look at the answers of others before you answer yourself! Cool?
Oh, and I want to see your first impressions, so don't overanalyse anything

Here's what I think.

The first guy seems like a normal person. The type that comes to school, studies, talks with their friends, and goes back home.

The second person though, I think I find them unpleasant. The type that acts like they are being very sympathetic when in reality they are just stroking their ego. The type that would donate a dollar to some social organization and hold a goddamn press conference on their social media about it.
 

Southdog

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First fella sounds like he's used to hearing his teacher get angry and mad like. The teacher probably blew up on students like this before. He seems passive and almost observing things as a third party.

Second dude feels like he might become collateral damage. The teacher probably ain't been too mad like this ever. So the student going white and the teacher's description is given as if this is a sudden transformation into being angry.
 

Jet

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The 1st person seems like a grammarian and stickler to all the rules. A non-native, clearly. Kinda simplistic and repetitive.

The second appears more or less native to me. Except "became" and such would be likely omitted. It's also more emotional, expressive. I like that.
 
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K5Rakitan

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Both use too much passive language. The first one is worse because of the "I could see" part. Well, did you or did you not actually see it?
 

Underload

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The first one is normal in Chinese novels. The addition of the word 'so' was the only thing that gave it character. But it felt overdone the second time.
The second one is a speciality abducted straight from some jp novel. And even in this one the narrator showed his timid character with the word 'so'.
 

Mysticant

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1. Objective narrator, quite a staple and nothing special in my opinion.
2. Very subjective and judgmental, sounds like a rather immature narrator. Personality sort of, but not likable from my PoV.
 

Anon_Y_Mousse

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Well here's my perspective as an amateur author:
1. This is pretty normal from a first person POV, though in that case it reflects the personality of the character who's being narrated.
2. Sounds like the writer recently read a hardcover book and thought it would be cool to get descriptive, doesn't seem like a proper way to use an idiom, though.
 
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