What's a good start for a prologue

[JayDirex]

Yeah, I didn't really consider that one. It's my mistake and it cost me a bunch of potential readers.

Although, in there, I also pointed out how the world works, their transportations, their powers and classes too. I guess they weren't patient to the point of reaching that.

Bro, no. that's the cart before the horse.

But this what you do: "Description in Action." Describe things only when people interact with things, or notice them. The story comes first. so only describe the world as the character interacts with it. If you want to info dump, or set a scene : "They arrived in the caspas valley, amidst a sea of rolling grass," is fine. But don't do more than two sentences, then get on with whatever the MC is doing to advance his mission.

Mystery of the world will reveal itself as the MC has to deal with it.

 

[Sylverius]

Bro, no. that's the cart before the horse.

But this what you do: "Description in Action." Describe things only when people interact with things, or notice them. The story comes first. so only describe the world as the character interacts with it. If you want to info dump, or set a scene : "They arrived in the caspas valley, amidst a sea of rolling grass," is fine. But don't do more than two sentences, then get on with whatever the MC is doing to advance his mission.

Mystery of the world will reveal itself as the MC has to deal with it.

Mmmm I see... Yeah, sorry about that. For a novel that I aims to give reality in fantasy, I'm making a very bad first impression aren't I?

 

[JayDirex]

Mmmm I see... Yeah, sorry about that. For a novel that I aims to give reality in fantasy, I'm making a very bad first impression aren't I?

Not at all. You are doing the same thing every beginning writer does (I did it too). You first start writing you think information is important as the story. It's not, the background is a setting. But sometimes it really takes a minute to get through to people that it's really about showing not telling. luminous scenery and lore of the world is not a topic of the book it's side stuff, unless it's specifically important to your MC at the moment that you bring it up.

The stakes to the MC's problem. Having a reader feel the tension of a character who's trying to solve a hurdle or an issue, and then fail or succeed. That's what they open the book for.

 

[Sylverius]

The stakes to the MC's problem. Having a reader feel the tension of a character who's trying to solve a hurdle or an issue, and then fail or succeed. That's what they open the book for.

Ah yes, the stakes. Very important if you want an immersive or a good story.

Not at all. You are doing the same thing every beginning writer does (I did it too).

At least I know I'm not the only one hahaha

 

[clover2218]

I woke up on a bed... of broken glasses and the suffocating smell of alcohol in the air...