Writing Prompt [WP] A parody of The Little Mermaid, titled The Little Blood Mage.

K5Rakitan

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Sounds like Ariel is having a visit from Aunt Flo
Either that or giving birth. The underdeveloped placenta expelled during menstruation is tiny in comparison to the one used to develop a new human.
 

UYScuti

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Isn't that how nonfiction starts, too?
🤔 The beginning of every story does not begin in the shire. No, it begins in the placenta of the bucket.

If Whoville resides within a snowflake, I wonder what kind of Grinch lives on the mount crumpit of a...

I never saw my son’s, though. But I had a friend who was a lab tech that weighed placenta’s.
 

OneSixSeven

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K5Rakitan

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I never saw my son’s, though. But I had a friend who was a lab tech that weighed placentas.
We plan to take a picture of mine so we can show our child where it used to live 😇
 

K5Rakitan

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Congratulations. And don’t worry about pooping while you push :sweating_profusely: I’m sure whoever sees it won’t say a thing.
I hear that the poop is actually important for building the microbiome, so I'm looking forward to that part 😇
 

UYScuti

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I hear that the poop is actually important for building the microbiome, so I'm looking forward to that part 😇
Well, if you get a C-section, then a little fecal matter from the mother mixed can help.

But be free and poop on that day as much as you want 😊 let people deal with a little shit when you’re pushing.

My exes squirmed out like a snake.
 

K5Rakitan

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Well, if you get a C-section, then a little fecal matter from the mother mixed can help.

But be free and poop on that day as much as you want 😊 let people deal with a little shit when you’re pushing.

My exes squirmed out like a snake.
For sure <3 I've been pretty constipated, though. I already eat a lot of fiber, but I've had to add in fiber supplements just to keep things moving.
 

UYScuti

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For sure <3 I've been pretty constipated, though. I already eat a lot of fiber, but I've had to add in fiber supplements just to keep things moving.
We have truly turned this into a shitposting thread. I can’t remember, but I think they give you laxatives at the hospital.
 

K5Rakitan

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We have truly turned this into a shitposting thread. I can’t remember, but I think they give you laxatives at the hospital.
Oh sweet! That's a relief to know. I haven't been on any laxatives other than just taking extra fiber.
 

UYScuti

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Oh sweet! That's a relief to know. I haven't been on any laxatives other than just taking extra fiber.
Well, I think they base everything off of the type of birth you’re giving, pain medications, and dilation. So if you’re early I think they give you laxatives. If you’re constipated, then that can probably become an injury of some sort. I’m not a doctor, though, so yeah, def. check with them. But I’m pretty certain they gave my ex laxatives and probably an enema as well.
 

Aoibh

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you gonna have to be careful taking laxitves when you still have a baby inside of you, it can be bad for them.
 

K5Rakitan

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Well, I think they base everything off of the type of birth you’re giving, pain medications, and dilation. So if you’re early I think they give you laxatives. If you’re constipated, then that can probably become an injury of some sort. I’m not a doctor, though, so yeah, def. check with them. But I’m pretty certain they gave my ex laxatives and probably an enema as well.
Good to know! My mom had piles afterwards, but of course that was over 30 years ago and they probably have better practices now.
you gonna have to be careful taking laxitves when you still have a baby inside of you, it can be bad for them.
Yep! That's why I'm just taking fiber for now <3 I'm not taking any medication that's not on the approved list.
 

TheTrinary

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Hmm. Well the Little Mermaid was about Ariel giving away her mermaidy-ness to be with a guy, so I guess it would be the same thing. Instead of becoming human, she has to give the evil witch all of her own blood.

And so the story becomes like a vampire story where she has to feed on the blood of others because she doesn't have her own.
 
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