Hit Me, Synopsis Feedback!

[Lorelliad]

I've been writing a separate story for a while now. This one's a slower pace than I'm used to, but I'm interested to see how it goes. So far, I'm loving it. Anyway, I need a feedback on this synopsis. Or don't, and just have a cookie for viewing.

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Before a fledgeling can officially call themselves a true Yriah, one must first undertake a Vow. Each of Antoria's inhabitants perceive them differently–often believing Vows to be the culmination of promises, oaths, covenants, and kinship.

Put simply, they are the culmination of an agreement between two parties. In exchange for the ability to use the power called Yism, a Yriah must complete the Vow they have pledged, lest they suffer punishment.

Nael, a young orphan boy–must strive to understand what a Vow truly is, while striving to understand why he was chosen to uphold The Evergreen Vow as its Yriah.

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[SailusGebel]

So-so. Looks too much like an info dump.

 

[soomuu]

For me, I'm just confused by the first two paragraphs as I have no connection to what a Yriah is or where Antoria is :) Maybe focus on the oath it self and explain the race/place thing in the world-building chapters?

 

[melchi]

I think if the last paragraph was the first paragraph it would be better.

Also, three new terms in a synopsis is a lot.
1.)Yriah
2.)Yism
3.)Evergreen Vow

It would be easier if these were terms that used existing language.

My take away from this would be that it is a story where I have to take notes to try to understand stuff.

 

[HelloHound]

I agree with melchi, though I would also like to add that some things, like Vow, are fairly self-evident and the reader can get new or further context in the actual story.
hope you're having a fun time writing