Funny pet stories

[TheMonotonePuppet]

@HelloHound you have the most pet stories to tell, so I want you in this thread! And @K5Rakitan a toddler is like a really high-maintenance pet! So you too!

Yesterday night I was working on schoolwork in the porch, and at one point, I left to go to the bathroom. Coming back, I heard leaves crunching outside. Looking out, I saw our cat Jackie in the darkness! Its glowing eyes looked at me curiously. I couldn’t believe that somehow Jackie the cat had escaped while I had been in the bathroom because I had been careless or something even though I was certain the doors had been closed!
I tried cajoling the cat inside, and even brought treats but she wouldn’t listen! She even managed to escape the backyard and leave the fence!
It felt like following a will-o'-the-wisp, because she kept pausing, and turning to look at me with her bright eyes shining in the darkness when I talked to her, and she kept getting further away from the house every time I got close!
So I had to wake up Nana and Papa, shame and dread burning in my throat.

Only for Nana to find Jackie… sleeping in the living room safe and sound?
…
It was a neighbor’s cat, or fox, or raccoon or something playing tricks on me!!!

 

[SailusGebel]

I will reuse an old story, cause you can't top it. When our doggo was young, she was afraid of her own farts.

 

[RepresentingEnvy]

@HelloHound you have the most pet stories to tell, so I want you in this thread! And @K5Rakitan a toddler is like a really high-maintenance pet! So you too!

Yesterday night I was working on schoolwork in the porch, and at one point, I left to go to the bathroom. Coming back, I heard leaves crunching outside. Looking out, I saw our cat Jackie in the darkness! Its glowing eyes looked at me curiously. I couldn’t believe that somehow Jackie the cat had escaped while I had been in the bathroom because I had been careless or something even though I was certain the doors had been closed!
I tried cajoling the cat inside, and even brought treats but she wouldn’t listen! She even managed to escape the backyard and leave the fence!
It felt like following a will-o'-the-wisp, because she kept pausing, and turning to look at me with her bright eyes shining in the darkness when I talked to her, and she kept getting further away from the house every time I got close!
So I had to wake up Nana and Papa, shame and dread burning in my throat.

Only for Nana to find Jackie… sleeping in the living room safe and sound?
…
It was a neighbor’s cat, or fox, or raccoon or something playing tricks on me!!!

That's adorable!

When I lived somewhere with a yard, my dog knew how to open the gate, so he would always open it if you let him out. If the gate weren't locked, he would open it.

Well, one day I forgor to lock the gate. I went to work, and when I got home I couldn't find him anywhere! I got scared and put a thing online. Got a call about 1 hour later. He had gone all the way across town to play with someone else's dog. Apparently, he had a whole adventure.

 

[Corty]

We were traveling for vacation in the summer, taking our cat with us. She hated traveling and, of course, has been meowing in her career all the time. So, as a compassionate kid, I took her out to hold her while we were driving. The moment I put her in my lap, she shat all over me.

Luckily, it was hard, but still.

 

[TheMonotonePuppet]

I will reuse an old story, cause you can't top it. When our doggo was young, she was afraid of her own farts.

I wonder what it is about pets that can't handle their own flatulence that is just so starsdamned hilarious!

That's adorable!

When I lived somewhere with a yard, my dog knew how to open the gate, so he would always open it if you let him out. If the gate weren't locked, he would open it.

Well, one day I forgor to lock the gate. I went to work, and when I got home I couldn't find him anywhere! I got scared and put a thing online. Got a call about 1 hour later. He had gone all the way across town to play with someone else's dog. Apparently, he had a whole adventure.

@RepresentingEnvy Wow! That puppy ate some ground with that speed of his! Crazy! I can imagine the terror! I have a similar story where I was scared to death!

I remember when I was on a vacation with the rest of my family, and I let the dogs out to go to the bathroom. They had been very calm, and stayed near the house, so when I forgot to put the leash on both of them, I wasn't particularly concerned.

Fool was I.

They escaped, and I had to go down multiple blocks down the street.
In the dark of the night.
Where all the houses are practically the same, cookie cutter in build.
They didn't have leashes I could easily grab.
And I was 15.

So I finally caught up with them and I had to hunch over, hands grabbing their collars, and walk them all the way to the house.

But here is the thing. One of the dogs we had, the odd-looking little buggart, kept rubbernecking when he didn't feel like walking.

So I had to carry the heavy, medium-sized dog the entire way with one arm, bending over extremely awkwardly to hold the collar of my energetic bigger dog ALL the way to the house.
And worst of all, I couldn't tell which house was our house for A LONG TIME!
I was just crying by the end of it, unable to find the house, with arms burning in so much pain.
FINALLY, I found the house, just a liiittle bit traumatized.

 

[Tempokai]

My cat looked at the welding sparks today. He was sitting there for a minute looking at it with the "I don't care" loaf position until I shooed him away for better good (for myself and his eyes).

 

[HelloHound]

• once lived near a golf course and spent an afternoon trying to convince Dorian (the younger idiot) to not run out of the backyard to chase some golf balls
• Back when the older idiot Patches was younger he would herd the children my mom got swindled into babysitting into little groups and nudge them with his butt when they wandered off
• When the younger idiot gets too riled up we put him into baby pose, which is the simba pose held against the chest
• Dog dances
• My brothers and I used to dress Patches like a nun and then repeat in a high voice "money for the poor"
• I'm sure there's more but these fools are currently yodeling and I need to see what they're serenading

 

[georgelee5786]

years and years ago, my family got a dog, Sophie. We would all leave the house for church on Sunday, and didn't want to leave her alone inside. So we would put her in a section of our barn with a fence. Every Sunday we came back, and she had gotten out of the pen. Turns out she could climb it, despite it being about four to give feet tall. It eventually led to my father putting a chain link fence from the roof to the floor of the barn so she couldn't get out.

Fast forward about two years.

My sister gets a little dog. We have a little gate to keep him out of the kitchen, and for the life of everything, Sophie couldn't figure out how to get over it. This one and a half foot gate bamboozled Sophie. She never figured out how to get over it, despite how hard we tried. So smart, yet so retarded

 

[K5Rakitan]

He washed his plate in my shower today.
He ran into Grandma's shower the other day and said, "Mama, Grandma has nipples like you!"