AetherialCore
Well-known member
- Joined
- Mar 18, 2022
- Messages
- 39
- Points
- 58
I've lost confidence in my writing. Reading what I wrote, I begin worrying that my prose is confusing and doesn't paint the scene the way I wanted. I know I shouldn't disrectpect the readers' intelligence, but I can't help but worry.
TL;DR - Do you get confused reading this piece of trash I just wrote?
TL;DR - Do you get confused reading this piece of trash I just wrote?
Myst Zven understood why the planet was called “Decadence” the moment the spacecraft entered low orbit—the toxic green of waste in the ocean and the glowing blue of radioactivity in the atmosphere were fully visible in the image projected onto the screen. He could scarcely believe that the planet was even habitable.
The spacecraft landed in the middle of a facility located somewhere on the continental equator, and two silhouettes entered the disembarkation chamber to greet Myst, who stood waiting inside. They looked like humans, but their true identity could not be further from humanity. The two were Automatas, each controlled by an Artificial Intelligence.
Myst steeled himself.
One of them was a model resembling a human male, with pale skin, blonde hair and blue eyes; the other resembled a human female, with dark skin, long black hair, and violet eyes. Both wore a kind of white robe woven from a kind of synthesised metallic fabric.
“My ID is Stiv115, but please simply call me Stiv.” The male introduced itself—or “himself,” if one were to treat it like a human.
The female did the same. “My ID is Lana223, but please simply call me Lana.”
Their numbers were only three-digits, thought Myst. They’re sending quite an important AIs for our reception...
“I am Myst Zven. I came here by the order of V.V.V.V.V. to receive my promotion. I am to become the Sector Director of-”
“We know,” Stiv cut in, using a soft voice. “We’ve been sent here to accompany you.”
“Please follow us,” said Lana, in a monotonous voice.
The two Automatas led Myst outside.
Stepping out of the spacecraft into the open field of the spaceport, Myst felt tension rising, and his suit warned him of the increasing level of radiation. He let out an internal sigh of relief once the number stopped right before crossing the danger threshold.
Under the greenish sky, they strode towards the nearby fifty-metre-tall structure constructed from reinforced concrete—the architecture was brutalistic, and there was not a single window on the walls.
Right after walking through the thick metal gate, Myst saw a rapid drop in radiation level. He could make a confident guess that the walls of the structure were lined with protection against the dangerous environment outside.
Are the Automatas wearing that metallic robe to protect themselves from radiation too? Myst pondered.
No matter how human the appearance, the Automatas were electronics, after all. They could be as weak to radiation as humans, if not weaker, depending on the intricacy of their composition.
Stiv approached the wall and placed a hand onto the panel installed there. He seemed to be inputting commands to call for a transport, because in the next moment a levitating square platform came to them.
The group got onto it, then sped down the hall on top of it.
The Automatas seemed to be controlling the platform somehow. Although, they simply stood still, expressionless as per the usual characteristics of Automatas.
Judging from the feel, Myst could guess that the platform used the simple technology of magnetic levitation for its movement. He was surprised to see the planet renowned as “Homeworld of Humanity” utilise such an outdated technique—but then again, the planet was also nicknamed “Decadence,” so it might not have been unexpected.
Along the way, a group of box-shaped maintenance Droids passed them, heading in the opposite direction. They were probably sent out to perform maintenance on the spacecraft parked outside. Unlike the Automatas, these Droids were not controlled by AIs, but controlled by mere Complex Algorithms. In other words, they were not sentient.
The spacecraft landed in the middle of a facility located somewhere on the continental equator, and two silhouettes entered the disembarkation chamber to greet Myst, who stood waiting inside. They looked like humans, but their true identity could not be further from humanity. The two were Automatas, each controlled by an Artificial Intelligence.
Myst steeled himself.
One of them was a model resembling a human male, with pale skin, blonde hair and blue eyes; the other resembled a human female, with dark skin, long black hair, and violet eyes. Both wore a kind of white robe woven from a kind of synthesised metallic fabric.
“My ID is Stiv115, but please simply call me Stiv.” The male introduced itself—or “himself,” if one were to treat it like a human.
The female did the same. “My ID is Lana223, but please simply call me Lana.”
Their numbers were only three-digits, thought Myst. They’re sending quite an important AIs for our reception...
“I am Myst Zven. I came here by the order of V.V.V.V.V. to receive my promotion. I am to become the Sector Director of-”
“We know,” Stiv cut in, using a soft voice. “We’ve been sent here to accompany you.”
“Please follow us,” said Lana, in a monotonous voice.
The two Automatas led Myst outside.
Stepping out of the spacecraft into the open field of the spaceport, Myst felt tension rising, and his suit warned him of the increasing level of radiation. He let out an internal sigh of relief once the number stopped right before crossing the danger threshold.
Under the greenish sky, they strode towards the nearby fifty-metre-tall structure constructed from reinforced concrete—the architecture was brutalistic, and there was not a single window on the walls.
Right after walking through the thick metal gate, Myst saw a rapid drop in radiation level. He could make a confident guess that the walls of the structure were lined with protection against the dangerous environment outside.
Are the Automatas wearing that metallic robe to protect themselves from radiation too? Myst pondered.
No matter how human the appearance, the Automatas were electronics, after all. They could be as weak to radiation as humans, if not weaker, depending on the intricacy of their composition.
Stiv approached the wall and placed a hand onto the panel installed there. He seemed to be inputting commands to call for a transport, because in the next moment a levitating square platform came to them.
The group got onto it, then sped down the hall on top of it.
The Automatas seemed to be controlling the platform somehow. Although, they simply stood still, expressionless as per the usual characteristics of Automatas.
Judging from the feel, Myst could guess that the platform used the simple technology of magnetic levitation for its movement. He was surprised to see the planet renowned as “Homeworld of Humanity” utilise such an outdated technique—but then again, the planet was also nicknamed “Decadence,” so it might not have been unexpected.
Along the way, a group of box-shaped maintenance Droids passed them, heading in the opposite direction. They were probably sent out to perform maintenance on the spacecraft parked outside. Unlike the Automatas, these Droids were not controlled by AIs, but controlled by mere Complex Algorithms. In other words, they were not sentient.
