Need help working out a charector idea

[Pmuno2abc]

Okay so put it simply I want to discuss an idea I have.

In the thing I'm writing the demons divine weapons who have their own personality and influence whoever's they are attached to are based off the seven deadly sins.

Here it is

A strangers story

Okay so I for real try to write a non shitty dark isekai Alright so basically guy and his family dies and he gets isekaid to a demon nation. In exchange for his service the king will bring back his family but this king isnt being honest about many things....

www.scribblehub.com

For sloth I plan to make its philosophy if I get this done I won't have to do anything.

It will make it's own worship group that will do anything and everything for it. It will put in effort to make it so that it can do nothing.

I plan to make this sort of a side plot that plays a bit of a role in the story about halfway through that will mainly come in side chapters so that I can keep it believable and well written.

Anyone have any ideas as to how to make this easier on myself since sloths story will be a manipulator/troop building story. I expect this to be hard as a bitch

 

[DemeanCosmos]

I'm going read sorry shortly so I may re post again but what about infiltrating small barely any guest except merchants take them over one by one then do same with merchants sperating every created spies and a network to make basically dark side of kingdom or say kingdom within a kingdom

 

[DemeanCosmos]

Ok read it like it? But could tell who was talking or what first 5 chapter scenes were

Also the. - is really hard to see maybe Chang it to easy see like [ ] or { } or even colors if have option but I can see idea of story

Next idea is making for simplafy to make way see his troops like black ring on he can see around neck Or marks above body's for owned or possible to own
which has effect to magically make them more loyal or completely

i have more but don't want shove like a power hoess done throat like over load hope helps
Good luck

 

[Pmuno2abc]

I have no clue what you said but the collar thing seems like a good idea I'll just use the blue collar as one of sloths tools or something like that and sorry but could you be more clear.

All advice and criticisms are welcome as I wish to improve as a writer and sorry if I made things confusing if you have any questions ho ahead and ask.

 

[DemeanCosmos]

Apologies the tiny symbol -
Is hard to see so readers may not notice like I did on chapter 4 so thought maybe change the little minus to a bigger symbol

Hope this makes easier to understand

 

[DemeanCosmos]

Also for caller thought of magical one so he can see his men from fakes cause regular one can be forged easier for infiltration but up to you