MR_Ethan
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This is the opener of my sixth chapter. Without any context, what are your guys' thoughts?
Beneath a closed and quiet slumber, the figure of a slender little girl with rosy cheeks and sparkling teeth. Her canines were slanted and her incisors were chipped at the front. To any ordinary being, she would be unseeable, but to Felix, she was as clear as ever.
“Fel?” Felix uttered, a mouth out of his finger tip.
Clouds stirred and thunder clapped before her, casting a flash of white. From the flash, it gave away her torn body. With her right gory leg twisty like a corkscrew and both her arms longer than they should’ve been, bruised heavily at the shoulders, elbows, and wrists.
She laid cold in a puddle of her own blood with her green eyes scrolling into the sky. Her dirty blonde hair absorbed the thick liquid that was oozing from her arteries, dying it a bitter red. Black leather gear scattered around the dirt and dire wolves attempted to gnaw at her intestines.
“Don’t let your sister go off..” The finger snapped with chipped teeth, “Your father wouldn’t be happy, would he? If she came as she is now.. What if you brought the body to him all those years ago?” The finger wrapped inside the void, “I loveee you, Fel and Fel..”
A whispering melody strapped around Felix’s lushful brain, winding like a thin metal barb as the juices carried the string; dancing around in a circle as a tribal symphony. His cornea zipped around his temple before a loud crash caused all the juices to fall and let go of the cable. With his eyes snapping back before him, a woman rushed to Felix’s blurry aid as he tumbled across the bed.
Because of her glasses, he could tell it was Doctor Marington, or.. Her hair was way darker. Even more so than the void he dreamt of. And she caught Felix’s loosened body.
“Shit!” The woman slid her hand under his fancy fur garments, pushing aside the plastic gold buttons and rattling chains decorating his attire.
Beneath a closed and quiet slumber, the figure of a slender little girl with rosy cheeks and sparkling teeth. Her canines were slanted and her incisors were chipped at the front. To any ordinary being, she would be unseeable, but to Felix, she was as clear as ever.
“Fel?” Felix uttered, a mouth out of his finger tip.
Clouds stirred and thunder clapped before her, casting a flash of white. From the flash, it gave away her torn body. With her right gory leg twisty like a corkscrew and both her arms longer than they should’ve been, bruised heavily at the shoulders, elbows, and wrists.
She laid cold in a puddle of her own blood with her green eyes scrolling into the sky. Her dirty blonde hair absorbed the thick liquid that was oozing from her arteries, dying it a bitter red. Black leather gear scattered around the dirt and dire wolves attempted to gnaw at her intestines.
“Don’t let your sister go off..” The finger snapped with chipped teeth, “Your father wouldn’t be happy, would he? If she came as she is now.. What if you brought the body to him all those years ago?” The finger wrapped inside the void, “I loveee you, Fel and Fel..”
A whispering melody strapped around Felix’s lushful brain, winding like a thin metal barb as the juices carried the string; dancing around in a circle as a tribal symphony. His cornea zipped around his temple before a loud crash caused all the juices to fall and let go of the cable. With his eyes snapping back before him, a woman rushed to Felix’s blurry aid as he tumbled across the bed.
Because of her glasses, he could tell it was Doctor Marington, or.. Her hair was way darker. Even more so than the void he dreamt of. And she caught Felix’s loosened body.
“Shit!” The woman slid her hand under his fancy fur garments, pushing aside the plastic gold buttons and rattling chains decorating his attire.
