Casual reader feedback

[Deleted member 156316]

New Writer Here, I'm also a casual writer;

Was wondering if you can check out my main story, along with my side stories that may or may not have some relevant to the main story. :PP

 

[NoFcuksGiven]

Here's my work: My Girlfriend Is a Succubus

Like it or hate it, as long as you read it. I want an honest opinion.

 

[PrototypeHD]

Here's mine if you want to check it out:

https://www.scribblehub.com/series/1026411/reincarnation-of-wrath-can-i-become-the-strongest-in-this-new-world/

 

[marvel_away]

If interested

https://www.scribblehub.com/series/1039512/the-choirgirls-mask-singing-in-shadows/

 

[RepresentingEnvy]

https://www.scribblehub.com/series/1005900/overpowered-witch-reincarnation/

Dew it.

 

[BernKatstel]

Would you like to read mine? Any feedback is appreciated. Thanks!

Grand Epic Elemental

In a world overseen by the goddesses of the four elements, Leiyu accompanies a trade caravan traveling westward to the Kingdom of Ishkhandar. Little does he know, he is about to meet someone who will change his life and embark on a journey to escape fate. *** This story is a...

www.scribblehub.com

My apologies for taking so long. I am only now catching up with the people who linked their stories. Anyways.

I read until chapter 20.

This is the score I decided on.
Overall: Enjoyable.

Grammar: 5/5
Nothing broke my flow of reading, so it automatically gets a five. No pauses nor any egregious errors either.

Style: 3.5/5 for the initial chapters, 3.7/afterwards.
It read like a play at the beginning, not too sure if that was what you were aiming for. Many sentences were short and not in paragraphs for whatever reason, which kinda makes the pacing feel weird despite not much happening at all in the scenes themselves. It gets better, but the problem persists, I believe, could be considered a matter of preference as well.

Story: 4/5
It’s nothing new nor particularly exciting, but I don’t think you were presenting it to be. The story is a good mix of cute/tense and is executed well for what it‘s worth. I liked your ideas and wasn’t confused at any point in the tale. I am giving it that score for being consistent and pretty entertaining!

Characters: 4.5/5
I think this is the strongest point by far. The style of your writing gives the characters a ton of focus and helps the reader in getting to know them. I liked the interactions between the MC and the prince well enough, but my favorite part has to be that of the King and his advisor. It was very entertaining to read through and I think I understood them despite only appearing for a few flashbacks and paragraphs before that. The only reason I am not giving it a five is that I think there’s juuust a bit of variety in personality missing from the rest of the characters and the main two.

Good story. Not exactly my taste, but I think I’ll finish reading through this one later. Please do continue with your writing ventures .

 

[miyaskya]

Hi, thank you for taking the time to read my story and giving feedback!

My apologies for taking so long. I am only now catching up with the people who linked their stories. Anyways.

I read until chapter 20.

This is the score I decided on.
Overall: Enjoyable.

Grammar: 5/5
Nothing broke my flow of reading, so it automatically gets a five. No pauses nor any egregious errors either.

Style: 3.5/5 for the initial chapters, 3.7/afterwards.
It read like a play at the beginning, not too sure if that was what you were aiming for. Many sentences were short and not in paragraphs for whatever reason, which kinda makes the pacing feel weird despite not much happening at all in the scenes themselves. It gets better, but the problem persists, I believe, could be considered a matter of preference as well.

This story started as a webcomic, so that might be why it reads like a play. I will be revising the chapters gradually to make the story more novel-like.

Story: 4/5
It’s nothing new nor particularly exciting, but I don’t think you were presenting it to be. The story is a good mix of cute/tense and is executed well for what it‘s worth. I liked your ideas and wasn’t confused at any point in the tale. I am giving it that score for being consistent and pretty entertaining!

Characters: 4.5/5
I think this is the strongest point by far. The style of your writing gives the characters a ton of focus and helps the reader in getting to know them. I liked the interactions between the MC and the prince well enough, but my favorite part has to be that of the King and his advisor. It was very entertaining to read through and I think I understood them despite only appearing for a few flashbacks and paragraphs before that. The only reason I am not giving it a five is that I think there’s juuust a bit of variety in personality missing from the rest of the characters and the main two.

Glad you liked the king/advisor arc (the advisor was originally intended to be a very minor character, but ended up taking on a larger role as the story planning progressed). I do agree that some of the other characters are a bit underdeveloped (although if you read past Chapter 20, there is a new character that has more of a snarky personality).

Good story. Not exactly my taste, but I think I’ll finish reading through this one later. Please do continue with your writing ventures .

Thank you for the kind words and encouragement!

 

[ArugonW]

Here is my work thanks for advance, great cat!

 

[Hopper]

https://www.scribblehub.com/series/1005900/overpowered-witch-reincarnation/

Dew it.

@BernKatstel Do not review the vampire's work.
You shall not review its work, brother.

 

[Hopper]

Also, Bern. I got you a story of mine.

It's garbage, at least the third to chapter five is. The sixth to chapter nine is mediocre, I believe.

But I hope the prologue, chap 1 and 2 are now fixed and fine, or at least readable.

If you are so deep in the boredom mood, and you want to get into the internet without jumping into Twitte- I mean X, here's one way to do it.

Remember, keep away from the three chappeteers.

DO NOT READ THEM, I HAVE WARNED YOU.

Start from chapter 6, though you'll be greeted with bad grammar. Cuz I wrote it when I was still learning my writing patterns.

Also, chapter 10 is where the writing is better than the previous.

 

[BernKatstel]

Also, Bern. I got you a story of mine.

It's garbage, at least the third to chapter five is. The sixth to chapter nine is mediocre, I believe.

But I hope the prologue, chap 1 and 2 are now fixed and fine, or at least readable.

If you are so deep in the boredom mood, and you want to get into the internet without jumping into Twitte- I mean X, here's one way to do it.

Remember, keep away from the three chappeteers.

DO NOT READ THEM, I HAVE WARNED YOU.

Start from chapter 6, though you'll be greeted with bad grammar. Cuz I wrote it when I was still learning my writing patterns.

Also, chapter 10 is where the writing is better than the previous.

I’ll keep it in mind

 

[Hopper]

I’ll keep it in mind

Noice.

Don't forget. I will wait fo your BRUTALLY honest review.

 

[AspiringMaker]

Hello. Please take a look at mine.

 

[lumiel]

Hi there. Recently I've got an idea that probably a nice one to invest in. Only my opinion tho.

That's why please try to look at mine. It's still ongoing and will be updated regularly. Yeah, it's still pretty new.

The World Beyond The Lens | Scribble Hub

 

[Nevafrost]

https://www.scribblehub.com/series/1052102/the-truth-is-mysterious/

Criticize all u want!!

 

[FlyingPotatoes]

As a new user here I would greatly appreciate your thoughts please do try my work Dicera.

https://www.scribblehub.com/series/1051920/dicera/

 

[Little-Moon]

If you are in the mood. I would really appreciate if you came around reading my story. :)

World Wanderer:

https://www.scribblehub.com/series/1033680/world-wanderer--the-dungeon-girl/

 

[NOTkaosin21]

It's my first work so I need some feedback. Thanks in advance.

https://www.scribblehub.com/series/646791/i-can-copy-skills-with-a-system-in-another-world-litrpg-isekai/

 

[jtwrites]

Hello there! I see you're sharing your thoughts. I'd love to hear what you think of my own story. Would you mind posting your review directly to the story? I don't mind others seeing what you think. No rush! I hope you have an enjoyable read
Star Fire

 

[ThePacifist]

Hi there ! If you have some free time could you provide feedback on my story. I want to know from reader's perspective if my story is engaging and worth reading or I have to do more work on it.
It will be huge help as I am a new writer and it is my first book .

https://www.scribblehub.com/series/1056769/the-ruler-of-judgement/