Could this man be forgiven?

[RinThao]

I work at a factory, decent pay, decent hours, and amazing coworkers all around. It's a good job overall; however, there's this coworker of mine who I found interesting. Let's call him, Quetin. Quetin is a quiet dude, keeps things to himself, not afraid to say whatever is on his mind, just a cool dude in general. One day I decided to invite him out to drink, and we casually talk. Throughout our conversation, he tells me he's on a journey of "redemption".

When he was 20 (he's now 31), he kissed his ex's best friend (let's call her Charlotte), who was 16 at the time, and he regretted it. He never had any tendecy to be with underage girls, and he knew he screwed up big time. His justification at the time was that his ex canceled on every dates he was planning, and Charlotte was the only one to comfort him at those tough times. He later found out that his ex was making excuses not to be with him, and Charlotte also had feelings for him. That's what caused Quetin to kiss Charlotte. Then after realizing his mistake kissing a 16 year old, Quetin naively told Charlotte's girlfriend (Charlotte was a lesbian, but Quetin was the only male she ever had feelings for) because he thought he could trust her. Another one of his mistakes.

Turns out Charlotte's girlfriend was also friends with his ex, and so his ex found out about it too. Eventually it just became a fuck fess and Quetin was quickly accused of being a pedo at his workplace (he worked in the same place with his ex, Charlotte, and Charlotte's girlfriend). Basically nobody, even the coworkers whom he thought were his friends didn't want to talk to him. He barely got any invites to their parties anymore, but his ex does. That incident alone caused him to think about suicide. He was convinced he didn't deserve to live, that he didn't deserve a second chance, but he told me he couldn't go through with it because he thought about his family who supported him. His siblings were the only ones in his mind to kept him sane.

So he later left his workplace, basically cut all of his coworkers off from his life, and swore to improve himself. He seems pretty chill from my perspective. As a young male myself, he advises me not to go for the crazy chicks no matter how pretty they look or even date your coworkers.

Now, Quetin owns a business of his own, still single mind you. I talk to him every now and then. Plus, it's been 10 years, so I like to give people the benefit of the doubt.

What do you guys think? Do you think he can be forgiven for his actions?

 

[SailusGebel]

There is no forgiveness for stupidity.

 

[Minx]

Yes, stupid things happens.

I think the one that shouldn't be forgiven is his ex, she really ruined his social life.

 

[TotallyHuman]

I work at a factory, decent pay, decent hours, and amazing coworkers all around. It's a good job overall; however, there's this coworker of mine who I found interesting. Let's call him, Quetin. Quetin is a quiet dude, keeps things to himself, not afraid to say whatever is on his mind, just a cool dude in general. One day I decided to invite him out to drink, and we casually talk. Throughout our conversation, he tells me he's on a journey of "redemption".

When he was 20 (he's now 31), he kissed his ex's best friend (let's call her Charlotte), who was 16 at the time, and he regretted it. He never had any tendecy to be with underage girls, and he knew he screwed up big time. His justification at the time was that his ex canceled on every dates he was planning, and Charlotte was the only one to comfort him at those tough times. He later found out that his ex was making excuses not to be with him, and Charlotte also had feelings for him. That's what caused Quetin to kiss Charlotte. Then after realizing his mistake kissing a 16 year old, Quetin naively told Charlotte's girlfriend (Charlotte was a lesbian, but Quetin was the only male she ever had feelings for) because he thought he could trust her. Another one of his mistakes.

Turns out Charlotte's girlfriend was also friends with his ex, and so his ex found out about it too. Eventually it just became a fuck fess and Quetin was quickly accused of being a pedo at his workplace (he worked in the same place with his ex, Charlotte, and Charlotte's girlfriend). Basically nobody, even the coworkers whom he thought were his friends didn't want to talk to him. He barely got any invites to their parties anymore, but his ex does. That incident alone caused him to think about suicide. He was convinced he didn't deserve to live, that he didn't deserve a second chance, but he told me he couldn't go through with it because he thought about his family who supported him. His siblings were the only ones in his mind to kept him sane.

So he later left his workplace, basically cut all of his coworkers off from his life, and swore to improve himself. He seems pretty chill from my perspective. As a young male myself, he advises me not to go for the crazy chicks no matter how pretty they look or even date your coworkers.

Now, Quetin owns a business of his own, still single mind you. I talk to him every now and then. Plus, it's been 10 years, so I like to give people the benefit of the doubt.

What do you guys think? Do you think he can be forgiven for his actions?

By whom

 

[The_3rd_Book]

In general? No, this system of exile helps dissuade people from being a pedophile. If he was unaware then thats really unfortunate, but accident or not it's still a fatal mistake. That being said if you personally feel like he's forgivable remember you might be pegged as a supporter of pedophiles. Be careful.

 

[RinThao]

By whom

in general. I'm sure he'll never be forgiven by any of his coworkers at all, even after all these ten years.

 

[Deleted member 54065]

We all did stupid stuff when we are young (and some, even things worthy of dark web). What's important is we learned and changed ourselves for the better.

(The only thing I won't forgive is rape, male and female.)

 

[Iamnotabot]

I work at a factory, decent pay, decent hours, and amazing coworkers all around. It's a good job overall; however, there's this coworker of mine who I found interesting. Let's call him, Quetin. Quetin is a quiet dude, keeps things to himself, not afraid to say whatever is on his mind, just a cool dude in general. One day I decided to invite him out to drink, and we casually talk. Throughout our conversation, he tells me he's on a journey of "redemption".

When he was 20 (he's now 31), he kissed his ex's best friend (let's call her Charlotte), who was 16 at the time, and he regretted it. He never had any tendecy to be with underage girls, and he knew he screwed up big time. His justification at the time was that his ex canceled on every dates he was planning, and Charlotte was the only one to comfort him at those tough times. He later found out that his ex was making excuses not to be with him, and Charlotte also had feelings for him. That's what caused Quetin to kiss Charlotte. Then after realizing his mistake kissing a 16 year old, Quetin naively told Charlotte's girlfriend (Charlotte was a lesbian, but Quetin was the only male she ever had feelings for) because he thought he could trust her. Another one of his mistakes.

Turns out Charlotte's girlfriend was also friends with his ex, and so his ex found out about it too. Eventually it just became a fuck fess and Quetin was quickly accused of being a pedo at his workplace (he worked in the same place with his ex, Charlotte, and Charlotte's girlfriend). Basically nobody, even the coworkers whom he thought were his friends didn't want to talk to him. He barely got any invites to their parties anymore, but his ex does. That incident alone caused him to think about suicide. He was convinced he didn't deserve to live, that he didn't deserve a second chance, but he told me he couldn't go through with it because he thought about his family who supported him. His siblings were the only ones in his mind to kept him sane.

So he later left his workplace, basically cut all of his coworkers off from his life, and swore to improve himself. He seems pretty chill from my perspective. As a young male myself, he advises me not to go for the crazy chicks no matter how pretty they look or even date your coworkers.

Now, Quetin owns a business of his own, still single mind you. I talk to him every now and then. Plus, it's been 10 years, so I like to give people the benefit of the doubt.

What do you guys think? Do you think he can be forgiven for his actions?

Yes, i mean why not.

 

[Arkus86]

16 is within the age of consent in many civilized countries, it was only four years difference in age and nothing more than a kiss - that she had no issue with it seems.
From this limited information, it might be questionable, but it's no end of the world, certainly nothing requiring forgiveness.

 

[TotallyHuman]

(The only thing I won't forgive is rape, male and female.)

drug and organ trafficking, cannibalism and warmongering are ok then?

 

[Deleted member 54065]

drug and organ trafficking, cannibalism and warmongering are ok then?

Dood, sometimes, we hafta use our common sense.

 

[CupcakeNinja]

I work at a factory, decent pay, decent hours, and amazing coworkers all around. It's a good job overall; however, there's this coworker of mine who I found interesting. Let's call him, Quetin. Quetin is a quiet dude, keeps things to himself, not afraid to say whatever is on his mind, just a cool dude in general. One day I decided to invite him out to drink, and we casually talk. Throughout our conversation, he tells me he's on a journey of "redemption".

When he was 20 (he's now 31), he kissed his ex's best friend (let's call her Charlotte), who was 16 at the time, and he regretted it. He never had any tendecy to be with underage girls, and he knew he screwed up big time. His justification at the time was that his ex canceled on every dates he was planning, and Charlotte was the only one to comfort him at those tough times. He later found out that his ex was making excuses not to be with him, and Charlotte also had feelings for him. That's what caused Quetin to kiss Charlotte. Then after realizing his mistake kissing a 16 year old, Quetin naively told Charlotte's girlfriend (Charlotte was a lesbian, but Quetin was the only male she ever had feelings for) because he thought he could trust her. Another one of his mistakes.

Turns out Charlotte's girlfriend was also friends with his ex, and so his ex found out about it too. Eventually it just became a fuck fess and Quetin was quickly accused of being a pedo at his workplace (he worked in the same place with his ex, Charlotte, and Charlotte's girlfriend). Basically nobody, even the coworkers whom he thought were his friends didn't want to talk to him. He barely got any invites to their parties anymore, but his ex does. That incident alone caused him to think about suicide. He was convinced he didn't deserve to live, that he didn't deserve a second chance, but he told me he couldn't go through with it because he thought about his family who supported him. His siblings were the only ones in his mind to kept him sane.

So he later left his workplace, basically cut all of his coworkers off from his life, and swore to improve himself. He seems pretty chill from my perspective. As a young male myself, he advises me not to go for the crazy chicks no matter how pretty they look or even date your coworkers.

Now, Quetin owns a business of his own, still single mind you. I talk to him every now and then. Plus, it's been 10 years, so I like to give people the benefit of the doubt.

What do you guys think? Do you think he can be forgiven for his actions?

Its not his fault everyone was an unreasonable cunt. There's 14 year olds out there getting pregnant and getting pissed on by celebrities and barely anyone ever calls THEM creepy little sluts, but a dude kisses a 16yo and everyone loses their fucking minds?

Call him a pedo after he slips his dick past her lips smh.

people just want someone to drag down, they dont actually care how insignificant the "crime" is. Lol "forgiven" as if he even did anything wrong. Tell the dude to stop being so dramatic just because his family and friends were little bitches freaking out over something that didn't even harm anyone

 

[owotrucked]

Imagine being mad over a 4 year difference. 20, 16... They're kids all the same lol. Back in my time, people didn't mind a romantic relationship in such range (provided that there's no sex). The coworker just shit on your friend because he was the perfect target to become the scapegoat and redirect all the hate.

Forgiveness in general? Sin? It's all bullshit. Moral rules are a necessity to ensure the smooth operation of a society or community. There's nothing beyond the practicality of it.

The idea of inherent value of good and bad on a person is a notion based on the illusion of free will. It's hollow, antiquated and illogic. But it might be a good leash to keep people follow the moral rules.

Natural selection made us into who we are. All social animals are equipped with both prosocial virtues like kindness and antisocial vices like deception. A foraging monkey may try to hide the bananas for himself instead of sharing even at the risk of being beaten up. A lioness might take in and raise a prey's orphaned cub for no other reason than empathy.

We, humans, are barely an improvement. Our brain are deterministic machines that maximize its well being. Maybe you think that rationality is your freedom, but I'd argue that isn't the case. Just like a calculator may be smart and rational, it is not the one to decide which buttons to push, which operations to make. Your friend didn't decide to be born and have emotions and instincts passed down by his ancestors that could conflict with the everchanging social environment.

As Hans said, young people usually do "stupid stuff" and learns. That's just how life is, every humans must accept and explore the mind that nature gave them. Because they have no little data to base their rational thinking on. Then as they are filled with real life experience, their decision making is less and less weighted towards instincts, which are often inflexible and inappropriate relics of ancestors. At the same time, decision making grows more adjusted to the current changing environment.

A psycopath may be born without the prosocial instincts. They might do dangerous and bad stuff and learn the hardway that it's not rationally beneficial in the long run if they land to jail. Then they might even progressively integrate in society.

Now, if you're a normal minded person, be thankful to RNG that you aren't doing crazy batshit shit because you're missing a screw. The concept of sin (and its forgiveness) isn't real because you don't have free will. The guilt or shame your friend may feel is an emotional mark for memory so that his decision making will never do the mistake of having shit friends and misjudging people.

 

[Poleg]

In general? No, this system of exile helps dissuade people from being a pedophile. If he was unaware then thats really unfortunate, but accident or not it's still a fatal mistake. That being said if you personally feel like he's forgivable remember you might be pegged as a supporter of pedophiles. Be careful.

She was 16, that is not pedophilia.

I work at a factory, decent pay, decent hours, and amazing coworkers all around. It's a good job overall; however, there's this coworker of mine who I found interesting. Let's call him, Quetin. Quetin is a quiet dude, keeps things to himself, not afraid to say whatever is on his mind, just a cool dude in general. One day I decided to invite him out to drink, and we casually talk. Throughout our conversation, he tells me he's on a journey of "redemption".

When he was 20 (he's now 31), he kissed his ex's best friend (let's call her Charlotte), who was 16 at the time, and he regretted it. He never had any tendecy to be with underage girls, and he knew he screwed up big time. His justification at the time was that his ex canceled on every dates he was planning, and Charlotte was the only one to comfort him at those tough times. He later found out that his ex was making excuses not to be with him, and Charlotte also had feelings for him. That's what caused Quetin to kiss Charlotte. Then after realizing his mistake kissing a 16 year old, Quetin naively told Charlotte's girlfriend (Charlotte was a lesbian, but Quetin was the only male she ever had feelings for) because he thought he could trust her. Another one of his mistakes.

Turns out Charlotte's girlfriend was also friends with his ex, and so his ex found out about it too. Eventually it just became a fuck fess and Quetin was quickly accused of being a pedo at his workplace (he worked in the same place with his ex, Charlotte, and Charlotte's girlfriend). Basically nobody, even the coworkers whom he thought were his friends didn't want to talk to him. He barely got any invites to their parties anymore, but his ex does. That incident alone caused him to think about suicide. He was convinced he didn't deserve to live, that he didn't deserve a second chance, but he told me he couldn't go through with it because he thought about his family who supported him. His siblings were the only ones in his mind to kept him sane.

So he later left his workplace, basically cut all of his coworkers off from his life, and swore to improve himself. He seems pretty chill from my perspective. As a young male myself, he advises me not to go for the crazy chicks no matter how pretty they look or even date your coworkers.

Now, Quetin owns a business of his own, still single mind you. I talk to him every now and then. Plus, it's been 10 years, so I like to give people the benefit of the doubt.

What do you guys think? Do you think he can be forgiven for his actions?

What's the Deal with them? They all are awful people.

 

[Jemini]

(The only thing I won't forgive is rape, male and female.)

Might want to watch your phrasing there. The way you phrased this, it looks like you said you are only against rape if it's heterosexual in nature, and you are just fine with homosexual rape.

 

[CupcakeNinja]

drug and organ trafficking, cannibalism and warmongering are ok then?

yes. At least those can have justifiable reasons. But rape aint ever about anything but you not being able to control your cock. Or pussy.

 

[NotaNuffian]

She was 16, that is not pedophilia.

That's hebephilia.

 

[Poleg]

16 is within the age of consent in many civilized countries, it was only four years difference in age and nothing more than a kiss - that she had no issue with it seems.
From this limited information, it might be questionable, but it's no end of the world, certainly nothing requiring forgiveness.

They act like he killed her and dumped her body behind a Truck stop or something. That cunt only kissed someone in a consentual way. The only person asking that should ask for forgivness is Charlotte for being a two timing hoe.

 

[NotaNuffian]

I work at a factory, decent pay, decent hours, and amazing coworkers all around. It's a good job overall; however, there's this coworker of mine who I found interesting. Let's call him, Quetin. Quetin is a quiet dude, keeps things to himself, not afraid to say whatever is on his mind, just a cool dude in general. One day I decided to invite him out to drink, and we casually talk. Throughout our conversation, he tells me he's on a journey of "redemption".

When he was 20 (he's now 31), he kissed his ex's best friend (let's call her Charlotte), who was 16 at the time, and he regretted it. He never had any tendecy to be with underage girls, and he knew he screwed up big time. His justification at the time was that his ex canceled on every dates he was planning, and Charlotte was the only one to comfort him at those tough times. He later found out that his ex was making excuses not to be with him, and Charlotte also had feelings for him. That's what caused Quetin to kiss Charlotte. Then after realizing his mistake kissing a 16 year old, Quetin naively told Charlotte's girlfriend (Charlotte was a lesbian, but Quetin was the only male she ever had feelings for) because he thought he could trust her. Another one of his mistakes.

Turns out Charlotte's girlfriend was also friends with his ex, and so his ex found out about it too. Eventually it just became a fuck fess and Quetin was quickly accused of being a pedo at his workplace (he worked in the same place with his ex, Charlotte, and Charlotte's girlfriend). Basically nobody, even the coworkers whom he thought were his friends didn't want to talk to him. He barely got any invites to their parties anymore, but his ex does. That incident alone caused him to think about suicide. He was convinced he didn't deserve to live, that he didn't deserve a second chance, but he told me he couldn't go through with it because he thought about his family who supported him. His siblings were the only ones in his mind to kept him sane.

So he later left his workplace, basically cut all of his coworkers off from his life, and swore to improve himself. He seems pretty chill from my perspective. As a young male myself, he advises me not to go for the crazy chicks no matter how pretty they look or even date your coworkers.

Now, Quetin owns a business of his own, still single mind you. I talk to him every now and then. Plus, it's been 10 years, so I like to give people the benefit of the doubt.

What do you guys think? Do you think he can be forgiven for his actions?

Err, yeah I don't mind him.

Possibly because I am a guy and I wanted to not suffer social suicide just by one little fuckup I made a decade.

Though to be honest, lets just keep the relationship severed.

 

[Poleg]

That's hebephilia.

Yes Thank God somebody knows the english language.

Err, yeah I don't mind him.

Possibly because I am a guy and I wanted to not suffer social suicide just by one little fuckup I made a decade.

Though to be honest, lets just keep the relationship severed.

If you have friends like these you need no enemies.