Madeus
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- Feb 25, 2021
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It's well said. Thanks for the advice.As some of the replies mentioned earlier these things happen and this is just part of life experience.
If you think about it positively at least you learned this lesson in a rather harmless way. Some people learn this by being screwed out of jobs, promotions, and even scammed or framed. Some learn this lesson by losing income when they have financial obligations, or they lose vast chunks of assets that are small fortunes. So if you think of these bad experiences as school fees for life lessons, you got a great price. I learned about the scammers and liars by being scammed out 200$ so still not that bad but it still hurt back then.
I'm sure this will just be a funny story in a few years and most likely you gained more than you lost from this. #profit
Well, I use to think that religious belief would eventually help me in my direst of times. But considering how much shit the world has thrown at me, even to the point where it actually broke my religious belief in how I treat the world, its mostly through how I handle myself and ponder the essence of living that I believe that you can still live and find the meaning of life through yourself. Even if time doesn't wait for you. Its not just physical abuse, I also dealt with mental(inferiority, lack of talent, uselessness and low esteem) and emotional(lack of friends, betrayal, NTR, sad love story, multiple deaths of people I care about and even the adultery of my father and how the world treats me like shit).
I didn't grow strong just because I was mentally strong from the start. I start out even when I was at the weakest and just gradually toughen myself up through trials and effort to be more confident in myself. And also how I responded with the human side of the world(the light and dark side of things) and ponder the essence of humanity from within ourselves.
I slowly understand that I actually have low IQ that it hinders my memory growth to the point I tend to have amnesiac episodes and blank out from time to time. Yet finding out that I also have High EQ that it causes me to have mental breakdowns to the point where I might go insane from how I easily understood the mind of a person, even the insane ones to the point I can understand how they move, act or perceive things.
The point I'm getting at is that humans naturally have their good points and bad points that no matter what, we can never be perfect in the essence of what God meant to make a 'Perfect' human is unless we understand the core of humanity.
I don't really have a strong mentality. I just adapt to my environment to the best I can.
Its more of an anime character development path I took to get this far.
First, I start out as a arrogant child who believe to be the smartest in my class. Only to find myself that I was just ordinary or even below average in terms of intelligence.
I then find out I was strong, only to get myself beaten through the pulp by an adult man twice my size to save someone just because I believe to be a superhero.
I continue to explore myself and find it inferior to be lower than other talents and discover that I never have any talents to what ever field I took myself in, only reaching the average point and nothing else.
Because of how my father told me not to easily believe in people, I stray away from making friends and end up becoming a punching bag to my siblings because they saw that I was living a relax life compared to how my family shove responsibilities to them because they are older than me.
My parents believe in talents and saw me as useless, slowly degrading my mentality to the point I tend to cause emotional breakouts from time to time.
When I faced with my first near death experience for the first time in my life, I saw that I was ignored by my family who never actually tried to save me and only through blind luck did I live due to the currents pushing me back to the beach, only to be rescued in the brink of death.
As my family got richer, I saw that classmates who I rarely talk to, began to approach me, trying to friends with me due to money and thats the first time I saw the darkness of humanity.
My mom and nanny taught me the goodness of humanity and it was the first time I was ever thought of the light of god, making the first steps of believing the light of god and thinking I would turn my bad luck into good.
It all goes downhill as my grandfather who took care of me in the past, had pass on. Next was my Aunt who educate me and love me like a second mother. Then my Uncle who taught me to fight to protect myself and those I care about. Each having sad ends such as a lonely natural death, a painful disease eating her up and an unlawful treatment of the justice system where a cop killed an innocent victim. All forcing me how dark and painful death was.
I then discover my first love only to be greeted with a painful separation after she became sick and ended up leaving town and a forboding event which cause me to realize how dark humanity was.
Seeing my mom cried and secretly hiding the fact that my father was cheating her with another woman cause my eyes to widen and fury rages on as I always idolize my father to be a great figure due to his talents and intelligence, prove that not everyone can ever be good and the trust he told me in the past was somehow ironic when he was the one who told me to believe in him.
Not only did I got betrayed by the friends who would help me graduate, almost having to repeat a grade because of them I ended up causing someone i care about, NTRed because of me due to the girl he likes end up falling for me.
I also transfered to another college course and while transfering, I found out that my mom passed away, right before my birthday which signals at how much the world hates me to the core of its being due to how much events had caused when all I did was trying my best to live.
And this is just a short version of my life.
I didn't grew up strong because I am mentally strong. I grew up strong because I persevere in the path I walked on.
In each of those parts of the story, I broke down, cried and even hated everything the world had thrown at me.
But I continue to move on. I was depressed, edgy and even to the point where I began to think upon suicide.
But I press on. Because I believe that if no one would help me, I help myself push forward.
I walk on those dead corpses of people I step on. Because they believe that I could persevere. They believe that I have talent when I have none. They believe that I was smart when I'm truly stupid to begin with. They believe that I was strong when in reality I was just fragile and weak.
I stand on because I believe that even if no one would help me push on forward, I, myself would push my own back to keep me forward.
Thats the difference between stupidity and geniuses.
One would think instinctively to move forward while the other would logically push themselves to a better future.
Even if you are weak, talentless, useless or just a waste of humanity. We all start out incomplete and move with the goal to complete ourselves. That was what god wanted me to believe. Thats what science wants to achieve. Thats what philosophers want to preach and thats what humans to strive to head towards.
'Our Perfect Human Selves'.
Evil, good or our destiny. We all have our good points and bad points but in the end.
We only live because we want to discover ourselves to begin with.
What is our goal in this world?
What push us forward?
It is mainly to find our goal and complete ourselves.
So, I believe that you also have your defects and inperfections but you can still complete yourselves by discovering what you want to do.
I think I've talk a bit too long so I'll just end here.
You also had a hard time. It is really great that you could develop yourself like that. It makes me want to change myself too.
Right, thanks for your advice!Don't let anything related to the internet or its denizens bother you. Life's too short. Also, wow at the 10 paragraph replies in this thread. Go write, dudes.
Thanks a lot! But yeah, I agree that is perfectly true. No one is perfect at all, I understand that. Though, It's just be a little sad to see them repeat doing that again.People are dicks sometimes. I'm sorry you had to go through that.
Thanks, I need to work on my esteem first. Since I think my low-esteem often hinders me from achieving something. Maybe I need to learn in believe in my own abilityThat would make them a "bad villain" xD
I hate the 'sad mass murderer' trope.
I REALLY hate the trope where you have some powerful being that's feeling down for some reason so they start killing innocent people by the thousands because of their sadness/anger. Why should I care about the feelings of a mass-murdering piece of shit? Why should I care if they lost someone...forum.scribblehub.com
I think this advice is relevant because Madeus stated feeling in a cage. That probably means stripping oneself of autonomy and freedom.
If the ego is the compass for decision making, then losing trust in it would be like being blind and crippled in Life. You'd have to follow the judgement of others (autonomy) while constantly repressing your inner voice (freedom).
On the other hand, knowing your ego (and not blindly following it) fulfills all your needs for love and confidence. At that stage, you won't be compelled to become friend with people because of a need but because of an authentic respect for others.
Damn, you went through so much tho.