Here is a little story I've been working on for almost a year. So far I've polished as far as the eighth chapter, but anything would be appreciated, as I haven't had much feedback at all.
Feelings and Fondness
Better late than never I guess.
Descriptions are good. Good word choice. Varied sentence lengths. The actual writing is pretty solid imo but the first chapter lacks any real hook. You're gonna lose most readers at the first paragraph so it's important to give them a reason to keep reading.
Synopsis is too long. I recommend going to myanimelist and looking at some synopsisi written there. Particularly anything that says [mal rewrite] those are all good and community curated.
Lastly the biggest problem with the story, something that will be hard to get past. There's too many British people.
