Differenciate between showing and telling

[Flash_Nuke]

I kinda have this problem. How do you know when you do too muc

 

[AKnightWithaKnife]

You can tell if you tell to much by the abuse of the first person POV. If your story is mainly third person yet you have POV changes everywhere then that might be a red flag

 

[LostLibrarian]

I kinda have this problem. How do you know when you do too muc

It's usually better to err on the side of showing. Showing adds details to your chapter.
Telling is good to give information in bit-sized chunks. Sometimes there is no need to show 50 different body reactions - "He is angry" is all it takes.


The easiest way (to me) to look at it more objectively is to write one paragraph per thought/action. It helps with the pacing of the chapter and makes the content a bit more clear, but it also shows possible problems:

You tell too much, when you read through your chapters and there is barely any description in it. Then your paragraphs will all be 1 sentence long and with nearly no content.
You show (or infodump) too much, when your paragraphs are full of details and you need 4 paragraphs to describe a flower. That might be good in special cases, but most (webnovel) readers will skip endless description if it happens all the time.


Similar thing for action:
If your fight takes 3 paragraphs with one sentence each, you might tell too much.
If your fight takes 97 paragraphs with eight sentences each, there is a high chance you add too much detail and show too many of the individual strikes...

 

[Jemini]

The "show don't tell" rule is really more of a guideline, as is the case with any of the rules of writing. It is a good rule, but I think people have focused in on the easy memonic of "show don't tell" a little too much to the point where a lot of people have ceased to understand the principle that the rule is REALLY referring to.

What the rule is actually telling you to do is to justify your conclusions to the audience. For instance, instead of saying "she was happy," say something more along the lines of "her face blossomed into a beaming smile, and then she jumped up and down shouting for joy."

In other words, don't give the conclusion. Give a set of actions and allow the audience to come to the conclusion.

Saying to justify the conclusions, or give examples not conclusions, would be more illustrative of what the rule is really telling you to do. However, it doesn't have the same memorable punch as "show don't tell."

 

[Anon_Y_Mousse]

Telling is like this
"X had a sad expression on his face"
You straight up just tell the reader what something is, this also applies for when you describe a character with traits such as smart, cheerful, etc.

Showing is like this:
"X frowned"
You show the reader that X frowned, which indicates sadness. Likewise you can set up a scene that makes a character look smart or making a character appear cheerful through dialogue.

You find a balance between these two, but you can choose to lean to one or the other.

 

[Assurbanipal_II]

I kinda have this problem. How do you know when you do too muc

As a beginner, after 300k words written a few angry reviews.

 

[greyblob]

I kinda have this problem. How do you know when you do too muc

Write the chapter, and wait about a day. Review what you wrote and see if the words sufficiently describe what you had in mind. Edit accordingly.
( the waiting a day thing is just for me though; you might not need it )

 

[hauntedwritings]

If you have trouble with the meaning of the rule 'show don't tell', you can think of it differently.

Most people (shamelessly making assumptions here) read because they want to be entertained - because they feel something when reading the story. Whether their choice are stories that give suspense, sugar overdose or painful tears.

So the rule is mainly as a reminder to keep the reader experience authentic. Too little show, which tends to be the trouble for new writers, makes you feel disconnected from the story. Reading that a character is feeling a specific emotion at a specific moment doesn't make us feel the same ourselves.

But at the same time, too much show will makes the story drag on forever and leave the readers becoming impatient instead. Yes, its all well and good to describe how each of the petals looks different and all, but...is it really necessary?

This is where the 'if something doesn't further the story, it should not be mentioned' comes in. When combined hand-in-hand with the 'show don't tell', you can get a somewhat clear guideline for when you need to show and when you need to tell.

 

[The_3rd_Book]

My take is:
telling: John picked up the apple.
Showing: lowering his body with a groan he proceeded to grab for the fruit.
Whether that is correct or not I hope it helps. What I was trying to convey is showing focuses more on imagery.

 

[Snusmumriken]

Telling/showing isn't about detail.

It is about whether you directly tell the reader what they should feel and think ("Bob is an asshole MC will teach him a lesson")

Or whether you would show the reader the necessary amount of information for them to connect the dots themselves. ("Bob liked to kick puppies when no one was looking MC will teach him a lesson")

Let me tell you something. Our brains love to solve puzzles. They love connecting pieces together and that is an important part that makes many enjoy the stories. This is why showing is more important than telling.

Do you know which books rely on telling? Textbooks. because quite often their task is to relay specific information and they cannot rely on the student to make a correct assumption. And that is probably one of the reasons why they feel so dull and boring to read sometimes. your brain isn't engaged in solving problems - it is engaged in only reading and memorization.

The issue with new authors is that they cannot yet express a certain feeling in the minimum amount of words possible. So they grow to associate showing with the increased amount of detail, which isn't always true.
Example:
Tell: I said X which made miss A indignant.
Show: I said X, Miss A sputtered.

Notice that there is not a lot more detail present. Less, in fact. But the first sounds more like a report while the second one sounds like something personal and immersive. Because your brain is trying to imagine her body language and interpret her actions - thus solving the puzzle and making you feel like you are actually there.


I will say something quite important - don't assume your readers are stupid. Don't chew down and explain every little thing - make them think for themselves. Don't tell them the candy is delicious - let them lick it and figure it out by themselves.

 

[HappyVainGlory]

I kinda have this problem. How do you know when you do too muc

Think of it as just a level of detail ranging from abstract to concrete, or super general to specific.

Telling is stating how things are, where as showing is going into detail on what things are like.

Here's a few examples going from telling to showing:

1. Bob angrily told the man in front of him to shut up.
2. Bob raged and yelled at the man in front of him to shut up.
3. Bob grit his teeth and yelled, "Shut up!"
4. Bob grit his teeth and clenched his fists. Glaring at the man in front of him, he roared. "SHUT UP!"
5. Bob grit his teeth and clenched his fists, letting out an unsettling crackling sound. His vision turned red, heart pounding in his chest. His left eye twitched as he glared at the man in front of him. Stepping forward, he stomped on the ground and roared. "SHUT UP!"

...Etc.

As with all things though, it's a sliding scale. You can always go to absurdity either way. Show too much and you bog down the story with purple prose. Show too little and people are bored because nothing's happening.

When writing, people tend to settle somewhere along the middle. If you're stuck on writing, just remember that you're 'telling' a story when you're writing. You can always 'show' more when you go back by picking out the abstract actions/descriptions and fleshing them out more by adding detail or more actions/features.

-HappyVainGlory

 

[LilTV1155]

I kinda have this problem. How do you know when you do too muc

When you realize that your sentence structure or the plot don't flow properly or connect well to other events.
Or when you realize that this part feel irrelevant for some reasons.

 

[BlackKnightX]

I kinda have this problem. How do you know when you do too muc

You just feel it. You know, feel the flow. If you can read from the beginning to the end without stumbling over anything, then it flows well, congrats.

Showing is like watching a movie, you see and hear what happens. Telling is like listening to your friend telling you a story about what happened yesterday.

For example;
Telling: I was surprised.
Showing: My eyes widened, and my mouth agape. I staggered backward until my back bumped into the wall.

See what I mean? But, I’ll be honest with you. As a reader, I have no problem with either showing or telling at all. “Show, don’t tell” isn’t a definite rule. You don’t have to follow it.

As a reader, if the writer wrote, “I was surprised,” then I’ll get the image of a surprised face in my head right away. Yep, that’s enough to paint the picture. You don’t really need to explain how it’s like, since I already know and have seen it already. So, telling can be a great way to move the story along quickly.

As for showing. You use it when you want to show the reader some dramatic scenes, emotional scenes, fight scenes, sex scenes, or whatever scenes you wanna dive into in details.

I mean think about it, it will be boring if the author just wrote, “Andy and Jessy have sex for two hours straight!” In this case, telling is boring since you don’t get to see the juicy part.

Lastly, to answer your question. Too much is when the flow got disrupted. How to tell? You feel it when you read. If you read without stumbling over anything, then it’s all good.

Also, remember this; Use showing when you wanna dive into the juicy part. To make the whole experience vivid. And, use telling when you wanna move the story along quickly. Especially a boring part, just telling it is fine.

 

[K5Rakitan]

I kinda have this problem. How do you know when you do too muc

You're doing too little when you forget a letter and a punctuation mark at the end of your sentence.