How do you get over the sadness as an Author?

[XianPiete]

I don't feel sadness during my writing process. I write because I have a story to tell, as a result during my writing process I am fairly manic. If there is any sadness that happens to me as an author it comes from the results of sharing my work. I just try to discipline myself to write more no matter what kind of feedback I am getting.

 

[DubstheDuke]

I mean this is probably because I don't write as a career, so there is no stress for me, but I have never found any of this 'sadness' that you speak of. I mean, sure there have been times where I felt that my writing quality isn't as good as it used to be, as a matter of fact I tend to think that all the time these days. But even so, I write for myself- not for others. If anyone happens to enjoy my story, then thats awesome and I am extremely happy that it did something, but I write only because I enjoy doing so. It's a hobby. A past time. Something that I sit down with a cup of cola or coffee while listening to some music, and say ah lets see what we can do here. What kind of adventure will my characters go on today?

 

[SwirlyUnicorn]

Hm... Maybe, but not exactly? In relationships, there are two people (or more, I guess), so there is the chance that the other person is just a toxic POS. You can try "rewriting" the relationship with them, but you won't always get out what you put in.

In writing, on the other hand, it all depends on your own skill and motivation. If it's not good, there's no one else to blame, but there's also no need to give up and despair.

What I meant was communicating effectively and the desire to be understood.

 

[Friend]

Parsing the op for vague intent:

• Sadness at being a 'writer' but never actually writing.
• Sadness at writing but never actually posting or publishing.
• Sadness at writing, posting/publishing, but getting no comments.
• Sadness at writing, posting/publishing, getting comments, but not the ones you'd like.
• Sadness at realizing all of the above is ... all blown massively out of proportion, even by our own simple minds.

... ahem. Sometimes we all need to pick the right sadness, or at least 'know thyself' and what we are willing to undergo. Sadness? Why not happiness in doing, rather than not doing?

 

[gaylolis]

Parsing the op for vague intent:

• Sadness at being a 'writer' but never actually writing.
• Sadness at writing but never actually posting or publishing.
• Sadness at writing, posting/publishing, but getting no comments.
• Sadness at writing, posting/publishing, getting comments, but not the ones you'd like.
• Sadness at realizing all of the above is ... all blown massively out of proportion, even by our own simple minds.

... ahem. Sometimes we all need to pick the right sadness, or at least 'know thyself' and what we are willing to undergo. Sadness? Why not happiness in doing, rather than not doing?

it's just hard to pinpoint my exact source of sadness, since a lot of things will make me sad.

the reason i make it vague is that i'd like to hear how they get over all kinds of sadness they felt. if i make it specific, it probably wouldn't help me as much since it's not something easy to put into words for me.

i just can't force myself to be happy when i'm sad, so all i did was vent out everything somewhere until i'm relieved.

 

[XianPiete]

i just can't force myself to be happy when i'm sad, so all i did was vent out everything somewhere until i'm relieved.

I can't force myself to feel one way or another emotionally either. When it comes to writing though, I can discipline myself to do it. Even if I write something unpublishable, I still write during the same few hours each day. When I am completely uninspired or just don't have a story to tell, I write anyway. Even if I just write on online forums or in journals, I write.

 

[WhoCares]

I personally try to keep my writing at a distance from my emotional well-being. Good thing (I guess?) about writing on the internet is you are forced to get used to harsh trolls and mediocre reviews (as well as being ignored in the ocean of content) so as long as I can remind myself that I am writing for my own sake (in that I want to tell a story) and for the art itself, I am able to stay relatively happy. The real sadness comes when I put my heart and soul into a piece but realize later it was not up to my own standard.
Nothing is sadder than disappointing yourself.

 

[EShadow000]

'
i think i learned just fine by reading the replies.

sorry, but listing these things isn't really my way of doing things, and when i do, it's for something personal so i don't feel comfortable posting them out. i appreciate the concern though.

We need to alter that way of doing things then. No harm done.

 

[gaylolis]

We need to alter that way of doing things then. No harm done.

i don't like it when people try to force their way of doing things to me, so good day.

 

[Queenfisher]

as much as I like writing, it's also the hobby that gives me the most sadness.

when that happens, i probably will just complain to my imaginary friends and waifus in bed, and hope i can have a good dream.

or if i'm in bad mood enough, i will just quit writing for a while. some time ago i stopped posting my stories for a year, since i need a good rest.

i wonder if you guys have your own ways to cope with it?

I read other authors. Once I realize I am sad about not being read as much, or not being appreciated, or not being noticed -- I remind myself that I'm not the only one like that. Most authors are like me. Therefore, you know -- treat others the way you dream of being treated yourself. All that.

So I just go on sprees reading other author's books, especially if they're struggling or are underappreciated. I'm not necessarily a commenter type of person myself (I'll break out of this shell eventually), but I hope that even reading counts as support. Like, "I see you, I appreciate you, keep going!", you know?

And it makes me feel so much calmer afterwards that sadness just dissipates. Hope this helps you?

 

[Grim_Ether]

Cats. Solvers of all life's problems.

 

[Yairy]

I agree 100% with @Queenfisher. Time to give our love to other authors who wish for at least one loyal fan of their work! Authors unite!

 

[Veliasal]

Listen to music! Personally, I put up my favorite playlist and stare at the ceiling while singing the lyrics in my head.

If your stressing out about not having enough readers or followers just keep writing! You are your own personal reader and follower are you not? If you consider writing as a hobby then that type of mentality really helps!

 

[Saileri]

I'm not necessarily a commenter type of person myself (I'll break out of this shell eventually), but I hope that even reading counts as support. Like, "I see you, I appreciate you, keep going!", you know?

I really need to start commenting more too. I usually only join if there's already some discussion there. Guess I started feeling a bit of hipocritical now. I've inserted encouragements to share opinions and feedback into my yet-to-be-released chapters, and yet I'm barely doing so myself

 

[Friend]

Also. Fellow readers and writers. May I suggest, following the profiles of authors (especially of those you read) and commenting to them that way too? And, don't forget to promote your own stuff in your own profile streams. -- for either side of it, most people want to be friendly but hold back from speaking up.

(Even so, I understand Nahrenne gives the friendliest *huggles* I have ever seen, for any forum or profile posting ... just saying.)

 

[amethystore]

I don't feel sad, it's just disheartened.

Well, if ever I have those camping inside my heart. I probably go check nhentai and read some NTR doujin. That shit is more disheartening so that I will start to think, 'ahh ..., this much is actually not that bad. There's something worse happening out there in the world(probably). So don't get sad, because my situation is much better than them.'

That's how I overcome my sadness as a person.

 

[anactualchad]

I used to read a lot of fiction to find a way out of my sadness. Ended up turning to "optimizing" myself instead. Proper bed time, destroying social media, getting enough words written every day, learning not to follow negative thoughts... It's insane how much these little things can put your mind at rest and lead to better, more positive thinking all on its own without much effort.

 

[Rellawing]

Unhappiness is linked to wanting. It's a feeling of entitlement you can't shake easily. You get caught up with what you're doing and sometimes you can get to where you think you deserve.

I find that it's best to not pour all your hopes and wishes into a single project, because it may not work out.

Like has been said, write for yourself foremost. It's hard to do that when you're serially releasing a story just as soon as you write them, because doing that means your focus is on the reader and not yourself.

Writing a story entirely before releasing can help, nya! But don't think it's just for the sake of making the piece as polished as possible, but just don't get stressed over it. It's more about giving yourself space until you're ready to commit.

And when you do, be pleasantly surprised if it's a hit! It's a tasty cookie you didn't know you had in your sweets stash!