How to increase the quality of writing style

[Indicterra]

I been trying write a novel, I have the story but I feel like my writing style is very bland.

Like it's more of a report than story, I don't think the readers reading my story will get emotional on a level I feel when I read good story with great writing style.

I tried to do more descriptive languages but all it made the story incomprehensible to many due to tough words.

Any tips regarding it, I would really like to hear more about your opinion on how to increase the writing quality which can enhance reading experience

Edit

Seems as some cannot give proper knowledge on what as they don't know what my style is like so here is a small part. Any advice

Destruction…… despair……. Death.



The Sky shone red like a bright ruby, The scorched earth glistened like black obsidian, the mighty mountains lost their contour as destruction chipped away their body, and rivers cried black tears poisoning the land.



There laid hundreds of bodies of men and women of different species and factions, burned, mutilated, and decaying, and in the midst of all these clashed the last two swords.



One was a woman, golden hair that seemed to have replaced the sun in this accursed land, and a face that is so beautiful that it can dazzle a thousand hearts in one glance, her body was the epitome of perfection, like a perfectly crafted doll, her attire was a golden armor that was partially destroyed and there were bruises and the burn mark in her body but it could not dull her magnificence, nothing but the word 'Goddess' can describe her.



The other was a man, with hair as dark as the abyss and eyes that seemed to suck the light out, his face was sharp and chiseled, with a jawline that could cut glass, and his body was like that of a Greek god, sculpted to perfection. He exuded a menacing and demonic aura that made those around him shudder in fear even when he was sitting on a rock exhausted, and injured.



The man's obsidian eyes focused on the beauty in front of him. "You have survived my final attack, Hero. The victory is yours," his voice was deep as the ocean.



She stood there, her face etched with grief and guilt. "Is this what victory looks like?" she mused, her tone dripping with mockery.



He nodded. "Yes, this is what victory looks like – a costly one, but a victory nonetheless!"



She did not reply. Her gaze turned to the man in front of her – the person who took away everything she loved, ironically the one who she fell in love with. "Are you satisfied?" she asked. "Ever since we met on that mountain, this is all you talked about. The Great War that will shake the Heavens and Earth – you had your war. So tell me, are you satisfied?"



His lips twitched, but in the end, he found the right words to speak. "I do not have any regrets,"



His words were like sharp swords to her, cutting open old wounds deep inside her heart, "Not even for what you did to me? " her voice filled with discomfort.



He sighed, "Your king warned you!, your friends warned you!….. I warned you, that what you seeking from me is something I am incapable of giving"



"Why? I never wanted you to cleave the moon in two. All I yearned for was for you to abandon this fake facade of being a Demon King, and embrace a life with me as a family." Tears streamed down her face as she argued, "We could have escaped from all of this, exchanged vows, and grown old together... we could have forged a blissful life. That's all I desired, to be by your side." Her final words hung in the air as she knelt before him, her eyes brimming with sorrow, and her captivating countenance marked by torment and anguish. "Even now, I am prepared to relinquish everything to be with you. So why do we have to end it like this?"



Her words brought a wry smile to his lips, he brought his right hand to her cheeks, slowly caressing them "I am a Demon King, Aurora, splitting the Moon is a much simpler task for me" he childishly remarked, which did not soothe the Hero before him, so he slowly stroked her head, "I did not choose to be a Demon King, neither did you choose to be a hero, it was fate's will, and the destiny of Hero and Demon King is to be each other demise because that's how fate crafted it to be, no matter what choices we make this is the ending we will come to because that is also what the fates wills."



He took a breath looking at the red sky, "You see for no matter how powerful we became, in the end, as long as I am the demon king and you the hero, we both will always be the puppets that fate strings, to move as those strings command us to move"



A pregnant silence was born. The undeniable truth started to sink into the mind of the Hero, that the love she has cannot be fulfilled



He heard her mutter, "You're right, we could never be together in this life"



With lightning-fast speed, she suddenly slashed her hand, tearing through his skin, shattering his bones, and piercing his heart, leaving him gasping for air. "Let us be together in a life where you are no longer the Demon King," she whispered into his ear. Blood gushed out from the wound she inflicted, and with a swift movement, she cradled him in her lap. "After I put down the mantle of the Hero, I will find you, and we can finally be together," she promised.



"And if fate tries to deny me again, I will sever her strings and hang her with them," she vowed.



The Demon King coughed up blood, his vision starting to blur. He knew he was dying, "Auror…" He whispered her name, his voice barely audible, and reached out to touch her face one last time



Aurora looked at him with tears in her eyes, regret and sorrow filling her heart. She had never wanted to hurt him, but she couldn't bear the thought of being his enemy in every life they lived. She had to find a way to break the cycle of fate and be with him, even if it meant taking drastic measures. As the Demon King's life slipped away, Aurora knew that this was their final moment together. She gazed at him with tears streaming down her face, feeling a deep ache in her heart.



Aurora brought his hands to her face and leaned in, pressing her lips to his in a soft and tender kiss. At that moment, nothing else mattered except for the two of them, wrapped up in each other's arms.



As they parted, tears streamed down Aurora's face as she whispered her final goodbye."I promise I will find you, no matter where you may be. I will find you!"

 

[SailusGebel]

Read more good stuff.

 

[Kalliel]

Try 1st PoV, perhaps?

 

[Indicterra]

Read more good stuff.

I actually tried that alongside with 'Do not tell. But show'.

It's not working tbh, I don't know what I should take from them. Words? Or sentences as whole

Try 1st PoV, perhaps?

Mine is 1Pov

 

[Kalliel]

Mine is 1Pov

I can't say anything for sure since I've not read your work, but if you have a problem writing like a report, even in 1st PoV, maybe try roleplaying as the character.

 

[Rhaps]

Get a dice set and let them decide your direction.

 

[Indicterra]

Get a dice set and let them decide your direction.

Flair checks out.

Is this where I get business cards or what

 

[Rhaps]

Flair checks out.

Is this where I get business cards or what

I have a business card in the making lol

 

[Lloyd]

If you want to be a good writer, you have to read a lot of stuff. Like a crazy amount.

 

[DaScoot]

Haven't read your story, but generally when I feel like a 1st person story is being too 'report like' it's because the story is happening almost entirely in the MC's head - almost all of the story is them talking or thinking to themselves. A much better way of doing things is to have decisions and events be talked out with other characters. Ie, don't just say "I went to the General and we talked about troop layouts, logistics issues, and the weather", actually have the scene be done. And then while you're showing the convo, don't have it just be the characters going Who What Where Why When How at each other, have them telling stories about their personal experiences, how they come to the decisions they do, telling bad jokes, etc.

 

[ACertainPassingUser]

Write more

 

[Indicterra]

I can't say anything for sure since I've not read your work, but if you have a problem writing like a report, even in 1st PoV, maybe try roleplaying as the character.

This is part of my story, what do think


Destruction…… despair……. Death.



The Sky shone red like a bright ruby, The scorched earth glistened like black obsidian, the mighty mountains lost their contour as destruction chipped away their body, and rivers cried black tears poisoning the land.



There laid hundreds of bodies of men and women of different species and factions, burned, mutilated, and decaying, and in the midst of all these clashed the last two swords.



One was a woman, golden hair that seemed to have replaced the sun in this accursed land, and a face that is so beautiful that it can dazzle a thousand hearts in one glance, her body was the epitome of perfection, like a perfectly crafted doll, her attire was a golden armor that was partially destroyed and there were bruises and the burn mark in her body but it could not dull her magnificence, nothing but the word 'Goddess' can describe her.



The other was a man, with hair as dark as the abyss and eyes that seemed to suck the light out, his face was sharp and chiseled, with a jawline that could cut glass, and his body was like that of a Greek god, sculpted to perfection. He exuded a menacing and demonic aura that made those around him shudder in fear even when he was sitting on a rock exhausted, and injured.



The man's obsidian eyes focused on the beauty in front of him. "You have survived my final attack, Hero. The victory is yours," his voice was deep as the ocean.



She stood there, her face etched with grief and guilt. "Is this what victory looks like?" she mused, her tone dripping with mockery.



He nodded. "Yes, this is what victory looks like – a costly one, but a victory nonetheless!"



She did not reply. Her gaze turned to the man in front of her – the person who took away everything she loved, ironically the one who she fell in love with. "Are you satisfied?" she asked. "Ever since we met on that mountain, this is all you talked about. The Great War that will shake the Heavens and Earth – you had your war. So tell me, are you satisfied?"



His lips twitched, but in the end, he found the right words to speak. "I do not have any regrets,"



His words were like sharp swords to her, cutting open old wounds deep inside her heart, "Not even for what you did to me? " her voice filled with discomfort.



He sighed, "Your king warned you!, your friends warned you!….. I warned you, that what you seeking from me is something I am incapable of giving"



"Why? I never wanted you to cleave the moon in two. All I yearned for was for you to abandon this fake facade of being a Demon King, and embrace a life with me as a family." Tears streamed down her face as she argued, "We could have escaped from all of this, exchanged vows, and grown old together... we could have forged a blissful life. That's all I desired, to be by your side." Her final words hung in the air as she knelt before him, her eyes brimming with sorrow, and her captivating countenance marked by torment and anguish. "Even now, I am prepared to relinquish everything to be with you. So why do we have to end it like this?"



Her words brought a wry smile to his lips, he brought his right hand to her cheeks, slowly caressing them "I am a Demon King, Aurora, splitting the Moon is a much simpler task for me" he childishly remarked, which did not soothe the Hero before him, so he slowly stroked her head, "I did not choose to be a Demon King, neither did you choose to be a hero, it was fate's will, and the destiny of Hero and Demon King is to be each other demise because that's how fate crafted it to be, no matter what choices we make this is the ending we will come to because that is also what the fates wills."



He took a breath looking at the red sky, "You see for no matter how powerful we became, in the end, as long as I am the demon king and you the hero, we both will always be the puppets that fate strings, to move as those strings command us to move"



A pregnant silence was born. The undeniable truth started to sink into the mind of the Hero, that the love she has cannot be fulfilled



He heard her mutter, "You're right, we could never be together in this life"



With lightning-fast speed, she suddenly slashed her hand, tearing through his skin, shattering his bones, and piercing his heart, leaving him gasping for air. "Let us be together in a life where you are no longer the Demon King," she whispered into his ear. Blood gushed out from the wound she inflicted, and with a swift movement, she cradled him in her lap. "After I put down the mantle of the Hero, I will find you, and we can finally be together," she promised.



"And if fate tries to deny me again, I will sever her strings and hang her with them," she vowed.



The Demon King coughed up blood, his vision starting to blur. He knew he was dying, "Auror…" He whispered her name, his voice barely audible, and reached out to touch her face one last time



Aurora looked at him with tears in her eyes, regret and sorrow filling her heart. She had never wanted to hurt him, but she couldn't bear the thought of being his enemy in every life they lived. She had to find a way to break the cycle of fate and be with him, even if it meant taking drastic measures. As the Demon King's life slipped away, Aurora knew that this was their final moment together. She gazed at him with tears streaming down her face, feeling a deep ache in her heart.



Aurora brought his hands to her face and leaned in, pressing her lips to his in a soft and tender kiss. At that moment, nothing else mattered except for the two of them, wrapped up in each other's arms.



As they parted, tears streamed down Aurora's face as she whispered her final goodbye."I promise I will find you, no matter where you may be. I will find you!"

Haven't read your story, but generally when I feel like a 1st person story is being too 'report like' it's because the story is happening almost entirely in the MC's head - almost all of the story is them talking or thinking to themselves. A much better way of doing things is to have decisions and events be talked out with other characters. Ie, don't just say "I went to the General and we talked about troop layouts, logistics issues, and the weather", actually have the scene be done. And then while you're showing the convo, don't have it just be the characters going Who What Where Why When How at each other, have them telling stories about their personal experiences, how they come to the decisions they do, telling bad jokes, etc.

This is part of my story, any advice

Haven't read your story, but generally when I feel like a 1st person story is being too 'report like' it's because the story is happening almost entirely in the MC's head - almost all of the story is them talking or thinking to themselves. A much better way of doing things is to have decisions and events be talked out with other characters. Ie, don't just say "I went to the General and we talked about troop layouts, logistics issues, and the weather", actually have the scene be done. And then while you're showing the convo, don't have it just be the characters going Who What Where Why When How at each other, have them telling stories about their personal experiences, how they come to the decisions they do, telling bad jokes, etc.

This is part of my story, any advice

Destruction…… despair……. Death.



The Sky shone red like a bright ruby, The scorched earth glistened like black obsidian, the mighty mountains lost their contour as destruction chipped away their body, and rivers cried black tears poisoning the land.



There laid hundreds of bodies of men and women of different species and factions, burned, mutilated, and decaying, and in the midst of all these clashed the last two swords.



One was a woman, golden hair that seemed to have replaced the sun in this accursed land, and a face that is so beautiful that it can dazzle a thousand hearts in one glance, her body was the epitome of perfection, like a perfectly crafted doll, her attire was a golden armor that was partially destroyed and there were bruises and the burn mark in her body but it could not dull her magnificence, nothing but the word 'Goddess' can describe her.



The other was a man, with hair as dark as the abyss and eyes that seemed to suck the light out, his face was sharp and chiseled, with a jawline that could cut glass, and his body was like that of a Greek god, sculpted to perfection. He exuded a menacing and demonic aura that made those around him shudder in fear even when he was sitting on a rock exhausted, and injured.



The man's obsidian eyes focused on the beauty in front of him. "You have survived my final attack, Hero. The victory is yours," his voice was deep as the ocean.



She stood there, her face etched with grief and guilt. "Is this what victory looks like?" she mused, her tone dripping with mockery.



He nodded. "Yes, this is what victory looks like – a costly one, but a victory nonetheless!"



She did not reply. Her gaze turned to the man in front of her – the person who took away everything she loved, ironically the one who she fell in love with. "Are you satisfied?" she asked. "Ever since we met on that mountain, this is all you talked about. The Great War that will shake the Heavens and Earth – you had your war. So tell me, are you satisfied?"



His lips twitched, but in the end, he found the right words to speak. "I do not have any regrets,"



His words were like sharp swords to her, cutting open old wounds deep inside her heart, "Not even for what you did to me? " her voice filled with discomfort.



He sighed, "Your king warned you!, your friends warned you!….. I warned you, that what you seeking from me is something I am incapable of giving"



"Why? I never wanted you to cleave the moon in two. All I yearned for was for you to abandon this fake facade of being a Demon King, and embrace a life with me as a family." Tears streamed down her face as she argued, "We could have escaped from all of this, exchanged vows, and grown old together... we could have forged a blissful life. That's all I desired, to be by your side." Her final words hung in the air as she knelt before him, her eyes brimming with sorrow, and her captivating countenance marked by torment and anguish. "Even now, I am prepared to relinquish everything to be with you. So why do we have to end it like this?"



Her words brought a wry smile to his lips, he brought his right hand to her cheeks, slowly caressing them "I am a Demon King, Aurora, splitting the Moon is a much simpler task for me" he childishly remarked, which did not soothe the Hero before him, so he slowly stroked her head, "I did not choose to be a Demon King, neither did you choose to be a hero, it was fate's will, and the destiny of Hero and Demon King is to be each other demise because that's how fate crafted it to be, no matter what choices we make this is the ending we will come to because that is also what the fates wills."



He took a breath looking at the red sky, "You see for no matter how powerful we became, in the end, as long as I am the demon king and you the hero, we both will always be the puppets that fate strings, to move as those strings command us to move"



A pregnant silence was born. The undeniable truth started to sink into the mind of the Hero, that the love she has cannot be fulfilled



He heard her mutter, "You're right, we could never be together in this life"



With lightning-fast speed, she suddenly slashed her hand, tearing through his skin, shattering his bones, and piercing his heart, leaving him gasping for air. "Let us be together in a life where you are no longer the Demon King," she whispered into his ear. Blood gushed out from the wound she inflicted, and with a swift movement, she cradled him in her lap. "After I put down the mantle of the Hero, I will find you, and we can finally be together," she promised.



"And if fate tries to deny me again, I will sever her strings and hang her with them," she vowed.



The Demon King coughed up blood, his vision starting to blur. He knew he was dying, "Auror…" He whispered her name, his voice barely audible, and reached out to touch her face one last time



Aurora looked at him with tears in her eyes, regret and sorrow filling her heart. She had never wanted to hurt him, but she couldn't bear the thought of being his enemy in every life they lived. She had to find a way to break the cycle of fate and be with him, even if it meant taking drastic measures. As the Demon King's life slipped away, Aurora knew that this was their final moment together. She gazed at him with tears streaming down her face, feeling a deep ache in her heart.



Aurora brought his hands to her face and leaned in, pressing her lips to his in a soft and tender kiss. At that moment, nothing else mattered except for the two of them, wrapped up in each other's arms.



As they parted, tears streamed down Aurora's face as she whispered her final goodbye."I promise I will find you, no matter where you may be. I will find you!"

 

[Paul_Tromba]

Read better books. The classics hold the best writing to understand and learn from. Using webnovels, indie novels, or tiktok stories will actively make your writing worse on average. There are good quality writings among these but they are few and far between.

 

[SailusGebel]

It's not working tbh, I don't know what I should take from them. Words? Or sentences as whole

You should look at and maybe even take notes of everything. Choice of words, sentence structure, paragraphing, dialogues, usage of dialogue tags, usage of cliffhangers(if you write and read WN) and other stuff. You should also look at the overall picture. Where do they write exposition, where do they write action, why they do it, where and why they end this act, and so on.

 

[Indicterra]

Read better books. The classics hold the best writing to understand and learn from. Using webnovels, indie novels, or tiktok stories will actively make your writing worse on average. There are good quality writings among these but they are few and far between.

Even then how do I reading will help me writing, many told me but I just don't get it. Maybe I am an idiot but I have read lot of good stories rowling, Tolkien, warhammer, alchemist.

It's might have helped with my vocabulary expansion but other than that nothing has improved

 

[Vnator]

I think your writing is pretty good. Maybe also try writing in active voice more often? Like the subject of the sentence should be what it's actually about. So instead of "there was a person, with blonde hair..." Try "A blonde haired woman..."

Hope that's something to point you in the right direction. And as others have said, keep practicing writing, and keep reading (actually good, high quality) stories. That's how I got better as well.

 

[Indicterra]

I think your writing is pretty good. Maybe also try writing in active voice more often? Like the subject of the sentence should be what it's actually about. So instead of "there was a person, with blonde hair..." Try "A blonde haired woman..."

Hope that's something to point you in the right direction. And as others have said, keep practicing writing, and keep reading (actually good, high quality) stories. That's how I got better as well.

Ahhh yes about that, I sometimes do that intetionaly to make the sentence longer and much more complicated and to make other feels like there is more context.

Doesn't making it shorter make the paragraph shorter, how you as writer deal with that

 

[Paul_Tromba]

Even then how do I reading will help me writing, many told me but I just don't get it. Maybe I am an idiot but I have read lot of good stories rowling, Tolkien, warhammer, alchemist.

It's might have helped with my vocabulary expansion but other than that nothing has improved

What we read is reflected in our writing. If we are reading poorly written stories then we will emulate those same poorly written stories in our own writing. Good stories have good writing so by reading those good stories with good writing we can learn to emulate those good writing styles. If you've been reading good stuff like Tolkien, Rowling, and Warhammer (not sure who Alchemist is) then that is good. I haven't read your writing yet so it may be good and you may actually be trying to reach a form of unobtainable perfection or it could be bad and just needs some practice. I don't know.

 

[SailusGebel]

What we read is reflected in our writing. If we are reading poorly written stories then we will emulate those same poorly written stories in our own writing. Good stories have good writing so by reading those good stories with good writing we can learn to emulate those good writing styles. If you've been reading good stuff like Tolkien, Rowling, and Warhammer (not sure who Alchemist is) then that is good. I haven't read your writing yet so it may be good and you may actually be trying to reach a form of unobtainable perfection or it could be bad and just needs some practice. I don't know.

I would argue Warhammer books are not the best to learn. Better than shitty isekais, still not as good.

 

[Dieter]

@Indicterra People tend to take Show don't Tell too far. It needs to be used with thought, not everywhere possible. No one wants to read how the light reflected off the marble floor of a majestic palace and bounces off the pristine armor of the royal knights standing besides lofty pillars. Usually it's parts where there're sentiment that you need to expand upon.

Anyways, the only low-effort advice I can give you rn is to not cram details into a sentence. Here's a longer explanation.