BenJepheneT
Light Up Gold - Parquet Courts
- Joined
- Jul 14, 2019
- Messages
- 5,344
- Points
- 233
I have decided to begin work on a complete Rule 63 series on all Minecraft mobs, starting with the Zombie.
I will give the Creeper explosive tits. I will make the Enderman a homophobic homosexual. I will convert the witch into a shota trap wizard. I will turn the iron golem into a dilf; the snow golem a milf; and the Ender Dragon a gilf. I don't know how I can convert the Shulker into anything remotely breedable but I will make an attempt nonetheless.
They are catching up to me. Either they take me to hell or I take them someplace far worse.
Pre-flight checks (F.A.Q):
What is Rule 63?
Google it yourself. I'd rather not be the one who breaks the news to you.
How many mobs are you planning to convert?
All of them.
How long do you think this will take you?
I don't want to imagine.
Zombie
Let's start off small and easy. A zombie. There's no difficulty in sketching one out. They're just regular mobs that eat flesh and walk like they have cerebral palsy. Just draw a hobo with anorexia and green skin. It's that simple, right?
I have a design philosophy: If you can't breed it, discard it.
And with that concept out of the way, here's my first entry into the series.
Hips, hallowed be thy name, are amazing. Washboard chest? Inverse ass cheeks? No problem; just give it a banging hip : waist ratio and someone, somewhere, on Twitter, would get down and dirty with it.
Now, the first question you might have for me is Why are you doing this? to which I will not reply. The second question, I'm certain of this, would most probably be Why is the face this fucked up?
Look, I could've copped out, drawn a regular zombie, dust my hands, and call it a day. My mother raised many things; a pervert, a social deviant, a parasite to society, a blight to the family name, etc. One thing she didn't raise, however, is a cheat. I took reference from the in-game model of the mob and tried to convert its lacking facial features into something substantial.
You can argue I've done a terrible job, and with that, I agree. I've never been one to excel at drawing faces, but I am inclined to think that my efforts have at least made a unique entry into the artistic depictions.
Moving forward,
I gave it a helmet. A netherite helmet. It's like giving a monkey a diamond ring. It's funny to me, though. The cheapest, most expendable mob in the game receiving the best armour variant one could possibly craft; tickles my funny bone.
I've also personalized the mob somewhere down the design process. You can consider it both a Rule 63 conversion AND a new original character. I'll probably write a new LN for the entire series too if I'm ever bothered.
Speaking of a new original character, I've also made this Zombie a cougar.
Now, sexual harassment isn't funny, but [STATEMENT REDACTED FROM LEGAL ADVICE], so do forgive me for this. Plus, the Zombie gets the sharp end of the iron shaft every time. That's apt punishment for an otherworldly creature with no concept of consent if you ask me who the fuck am I kidding it's a flesh-eating Zombie who gives a shit if it gropes a pectoral or two.
You might be thinking about the guy with an A on his face. Who is he? you might be thinking. If your guess is Anon, you're half right. This guy isn't a throwaway character. He's got his own backstory and everything. His name is Adam. Or Aaron. Or Alan. It's interchangeable. He might really be named Anon for all I care. The only thing that matters in the subject is that his name starts with an A, and that's all you need to know (for now).
Progress Report
I've begun taking progress shots of my work as of late. It's actually an old practice I used to commit back then. It's a fun way to see where you fucked up or came up with a great idea that made/saved/broke your final sketch. It's not some discipline where I transcript my entire process down to the smallest notches I erase and note the time while I'm working. It's just a personal third-party observation I do for myself out of interest.
That's enough of me for today.
There's a silver 2017 Honda CR-V outside my apartment block. Silver. Custom wheel rims. Unregistered plates. Tinted windows. Engine dead. Parked at the visitor space. It's been coming every week since late July. It'll arrive at around 0500 - 0600 and leave at 1900 on the dot, with a margin of error of 15 minutes for their arrival.
They've found me.
They're watching me.
They don't know I'm the one watching them instead.
Next Up:
Skeleton
I will give the Creeper explosive tits. I will make the Enderman a homophobic homosexual. I will convert the witch into a shota trap wizard. I will turn the iron golem into a dilf; the snow golem a milf; and the Ender Dragon a gilf. I don't know how I can convert the Shulker into anything remotely breedable but I will make an attempt nonetheless.
They are catching up to me. Either they take me to hell or I take them someplace far worse.
Pre-flight checks (F.A.Q):
What is Rule 63?
Google it yourself. I'd rather not be the one who breaks the news to you.
How many mobs are you planning to convert?
All of them.
How long do you think this will take you?
I don't want to imagine.
Zombie
Let's start off small and easy. A zombie. There's no difficulty in sketching one out. They're just regular mobs that eat flesh and walk like they have cerebral palsy. Just draw a hobo with anorexia and green skin. It's that simple, right?
I have a design philosophy: If you can't breed it, discard it.
And with that concept out of the way, here's my first entry into the series.
Now, the first question you might have for me is Why are you doing this? to which I will not reply. The second question, I'm certain of this, would most probably be Why is the face this fucked up?
Look, I could've copped out, drawn a regular zombie, dust my hands, and call it a day. My mother raised many things; a pervert, a social deviant, a parasite to society, a blight to the family name, etc. One thing she didn't raise, however, is a cheat. I took reference from the in-game model of the mob and tried to convert its lacking facial features into something substantial.
You can argue I've done a terrible job, and with that, I agree. I've never been one to excel at drawing faces, but I am inclined to think that my efforts have at least made a unique entry into the artistic depictions.
Moving forward,
I gave it a helmet. A netherite helmet. It's like giving a monkey a diamond ring. It's funny to me, though. The cheapest, most expendable mob in the game receiving the best armour variant one could possibly craft; tickles my funny bone.
I've also personalized the mob somewhere down the design process. You can consider it both a Rule 63 conversion AND a new original character. I'll probably write a new LN for the entire series too if I'm ever bothered.
Speaking of a new original character, I've also made this Zombie a cougar.
You might be thinking about the guy with an A on his face. Who is he? you might be thinking. If your guess is Anon, you're half right. This guy isn't a throwaway character. He's got his own backstory and everything. His name is Adam. Or Aaron. Or Alan. It's interchangeable. He might really be named Anon for all I care. The only thing that matters in the subject is that his name starts with an A, and that's all you need to know (for now).
Progress Report
I've begun taking progress shots of my work as of late. It's actually an old practice I used to commit back then. It's a fun way to see where you fucked up or came up with a great idea that made/saved/broke your final sketch. It's not some discipline where I transcript my entire process down to the smallest notches I erase and note the time while I'm working. It's just a personal third-party observation I do for myself out of interest.
That's enough of me for today.
There's a silver 2017 Honda CR-V outside my apartment block. Silver. Custom wheel rims. Unregistered plates. Tinted windows. Engine dead. Parked at the visitor space. It's been coming every week since late July. It'll arrive at around 0500 - 0600 and leave at 1900 on the dot, with a margin of error of 15 minutes for their arrival.
They've found me.
They're watching me.
They don't know I'm the one watching them instead.
Next Up:
Skeleton
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