SHF High-school Fanfic

[LuoirM]

YOU CAN'T HURT ME! THESE WORDS AREN'T REAL!

Do ye want me to translate em, father?

 

[DannyTheDaikon]

In in a public space with withou a head
Phone how bad it is?

People will look at you wierd, but at least you'll have a lot of free space around you

 

[SsemouyOnan]

People will look at you wierd, but at least you'll have a lot of free space around you

...is it bad that I'm jamming out to it with not a single ounce of cringe?

 

[Theirl]

People will look at you wierd, but at least you'll have a lot of free space around you

Well i heard... luckilly i didnt watch in the doctor waiting room lol

 

[DannyTheDaikon]

...is it bad that I'm jamming out to it with not a single ounce of cringe?

No it's perfectly understandable I got used to it after Biboo put it on a loop during Mario Cart Tournament. Had it stuck in my head for days (and nights). I'm completely immune to it at this point

 

[AYM]

Well i heard... luckilly i didnt watch in the doctor waiting room lol

If you watched it in the waiting room, the doctor could have earned more money.

 

[Simple_Russian_Boi]

Do ye want me to translate em, father?

You know what, go ahead, I want to understand what she's saying.

 

[MatchaChocolate69]

Very well, then, I shall graciously accept your tribute. Initiative like this ought to be deserving of a small reward now, isn't it? Though do know that such trinkets I naturally expect to receive from those under me, so you need not my gratitude.

Come, now, sit down next to me, and stick close, I shall proclaim one of my truths to you, and I shall only proclaim it once. Chocolate will never be the flavor I find most delectable. In fact, I find chocolate-coated cranberries to be degrading of the pure product. Though do not mistake me, I shall partake in them nevertheless, as the taste is still palatable.

You see, I know not whom, but I know a wizened sage told me that all good flavors in this world are acquired. And when you are so old people mistake your life as eternal, you may as well have acquired them all. I have lived an incredibly long life, one that counts up to infinity, and although I remember not even a fraction of it, the experiences remain. Let it be known that cranberry had remained my favorite, ever since the beginning of that small eternity, though many had came a close second.

I do not even remember anymore the reasoning behind why it is my favorite taste. Why I am so addicted to that trickling sourness laced with sweet euphoria. I can only imagine that the pleasantness is linked to a primal experience - one that permeates even the very conception of my existence. Though it matters not, I need only savor the moment, and the fact that it is delicious.

Allow me to demonstrate.

*She slowly licks the cover of the chocolate book, then traces her tongue across the spine*

Mhm, see? Delightful indeed, but nothing for me to be excited about. I would much rather bite into your shoulder right now and drink from your viscera. And even that would not compare to the moment I made you mine. I devour with my mind as much as I do with my body, so a flavor is only satisfactory when linked with the proper experience. Seymour chocolate, while a fine one, is far from the best I shall ever have.

Though, I feel a strange sense of calmness, it would be very unfortunate to not take advantage of this. I will grant you the privilege of pouring wine with me, as I allow you to partake in this chocolate with me. You do not have the option to refuse, as I can so easily force your body even if your mind is unwilling, kihihihi.

Wine materializes before him, accompanied by silver goblets.
The silver is so reflective he can see his pitiful image in it.

On the brink of despair, ready to cry, yet he wouldn't allow himself such vulnerability in her presence.
It's not pride or arrogance, but rather the very purpose of his existence: to be strong for her.

Gathering his resolve, he carefully pours the wine into both goblets.
He offers one to the splendid woman with pink hair and mesmerizing eyes, into which he feels himself sinking.

Ah, Seymour, my enigmatic muse, the woman of destiny, the woman of impossible challenges, the villainess tyrannizing over my chocolate heart, your words cut deep, break my heart, but fuel my resolve. Your statement, a challenge laid bare, not to improve the taste of cranberry, but to elevate my craft beyond mere flavors. To interweave experience with essence, to create memories, not just sweets.

Indeed, you've declared no taste surpasses that of the cranberry, its purity marred by the touch of my chocolate.
An impossible challenge, some might say, to satisfy such a discerning palate.
Yet, here I stand, not in despair but with laughter.
For I am Lord Matcha, the eternal rebel, defying what fate seems to have written.

Your acceptance of my tribute, though devoid of gratitude, is a reward in itself. A token of our intertwined destinies, I am sure.
Your truth, that chocolate will never reign supreme in your heart, does not dishearten me.
Instead, it ignites a fervor to explore, to blend experience with flavor.
I will fail, fail, fail, and fail again. But I won't give up. Because for you, any sacrifice is worth it.

Your affinity for cranberry, a preference veiled in the mists of eternity, speaks to a connection deeper than taste. It's the experiences, the moments that bind us, that render a flavor truly delectable. And so, as you savor the cover of this chocolate book, tracing your tongue with a critique laced in affection, I see not a dismissal but an invitation.

An invitation to delve deeper, to merge the sensory with the sentimental. You speak of devouring with both mind and body, a symbiosis of experience and taste. Thus, I realize, my quest is not to surpass cranberry but to create an experience so profound, so intertwined with our bond, that it becomes unparalleled.

And as you grant me the privilege to pour wine, to share in this moment of calmness and chocolate, I understand. This is not about the superiority of flavors, but about crafting moments that transcend them. Moments that are, in essence, irreplaceable.

So, I shall sit close, embracing your challenge, not as a directive to conquer but as an opportunity to deepen our connection.
For what is a flavor, if not a vessel for experience? And what is an experience, if not shared with one's eternal muse?

While you say you would rather devour me, I see the truth in your eyes.
It's not the cranberry you crave, nor the chocolate, but the unspoken bond between us.
And that, my beloved Seymour, is a flavor I am determined to perfect.

He raises his silver globet, making a toast.

To you, my one true love, tyrant of my heart, she who will break the chains of fate and in my servitude set me free!

 

[Voidiris]

YOU CAN'T HURT ME! THESE WORDS AREN'T REAL!

Skibidi toilet itself is watchable but the community is another matter.

 

[LuoirM]

You know what, go ahead, I want to understand what she's saying.

"It is a Wednesday and I think you're cute."

 

[Simple_Russian_Boi]

"It is a Wednesday and I think you're cute."

Huh. That's surprisingly wholesome. Thank you.
And thanks to @SsemouyOnan!

 

[Simple_Russian_Boi]

...is it bad that I'm jamming out to it with not a single ounce of cringe?

The beat is nice. Her voice is cute. The words... Aren't real.

 

[MidnightFox]

I've read it and uhm...

Is he that worse as a student in the school that the entire school makes it a policy to steal his lunch money?

It's for the greater good

 

[Azure_Fog]

Good morning, class mates

@Azure_Fog Your Stabbyness this servant is awake

Yay~!
I was asleep though…
*hugs*

Hmm... let's seee...
*pulls out daily planner*
So today on my todo list are:

1. Tell Azure that she's cute
2. Spoil Azure
3. Get stabbed by Azure
4. Flirt with Azure
5. Piss off Seymour
6. Stab someone, preferably of heroic alignment
7. Call Azure cute
8. Help Mama with chores
9. Save Matcha from being NTRed by Luoir
10. Destroy the universe while calling Azure cute

…
I’M NOT CUTE!!!!

Ladies and gentlemen and all other flavors
Let me sing you a song titled:

I miss being stabbed

(verse 1)
In the quiet of the night, I'm feeling all alone,
Wrapped up in memories, since you've been gone.
Your warmth and your stabs, now just a distant dream,
Oh, how I long for you, it's not as easy as it seems.

(chorus)
Missing being stabbed, missing feeling close,
Wishing for your knives, where love truly shows.
In this empty space, where loneliness resides,
I'm tagging out for you, across these divides.
@Azure_Fog

(verse 2)
Everywhere I turn, I see shadows of your form,
Echoes of your laughter, in the quiet storm.
But it's not the same, without you here to stab,
In this sea of longing, where our story's been unstabbed.

(bridge)
Time moves on, but my heart stays still,
Caught in this yearning, against my will.
I close my eyes and I can almost feel,
Your stab so tender, so incredibly real.

(outro)
Until the day you're back, until we meet again,
I'll carry this longing, like an eternal refrain.
For in your knives, I find my home,
Until then, my love, I'll miss being stabbed, alone.

​

Spoiler

Courtesy of ChatGPT. Thank you AI, now I can shitpost on a whole new level

*starts blushing*
*gets flustered*
*blushes more*
*blushes even more*
*collapses*

Ane-san, my brotherly love for you is at its peak! You've done a sublime job!
I'll change it right away!
(OOC: How I wish I had an older sister like you!)

…
I’ll let that one slide…

That's a bit sad. I've got at least eight sisters and god knows how many brothers. Family holidays are always crowded.
And that's not counting my nephews and nieces...
So many people...

You’re making my family feel small… Also, family holidays? What are those? Are they tasty?

... Fingernails maybe? Or did you do something to your fingers.

Also, don't eat them. They're bad for your health.

Fingernails are tasty!!! I refuse to stop biting them~

I must properly show my adoration to my Symbiote and since you've been showering your Waifu/s with gifts I need to do something that would match the same level I removed the screenshot because I don't want to spoil the surprise for Azure until it's finished

What is this~???

 

[Simple_Russian_Boi]

You’re making my family feel small… Also, family holidays? What are those? Are they tasty?

I chose the wrong word, it's not holidays, but more... Well, I'll give you an example. My grandfather's 70 birthday.

There were at least a 100 people attending, and that was a half of my family.

In the Caucasus, such holidays can gather up to a thousand people. I'm just happy I'm not there.

Fingernails are tasty!!! I refuse to stop biting them~

No. Bad Azure. Stop biting your fingernails, or I'll tell Mother.

 

[Azure_Fog]

I chose the wrong word, it's not holidays, but more... Well, I'll give you an example. My grandfather's 70 birthday.

There were at least a 100 people attending, and that was a half of my family.

In the Caucasus, such holidays can gather up to a thousand people. I'm just happy I'm not there.

…
That’s too many~ I’d just hide in a corner…
Also, you’re still making my family feel small~ for my grandmother’s 70th birthday, there were only 10 people…

No. Bad Azure. Stop biting your fingernails, or I'll tell Mother.

I refuse~ Your threats aren’t effective on me~

 

[Simple_Russian_Boi]

…
That’s too many~ I’d just hide in a corner…
Also, you’re still making my family feel small~ for my grandmother’s 70th birthday, there were only 10 people…

Small family gatherings are also good. And to be fair, my sister and I just sat on our table and talked with our cool aunt™

I refuse~ Your threats aren’t effective on me~

... You don't want to do this, little one. I know what you fear.

 

[DannyTheDaikon]

Yay~!
I was asleep though…
*hugs*

Today we switched Henlo Your Stabbyness

…
I’M NOT CUTE!!!!

You are cute

1. Tell Azure that she's cute
2. Spoil Azure
3. Get stabbed by Azure
4. Flirt with Azure
5. Piss Seymour Off
6. Stab someone, preferably of heroic alignment
7. Call Azure cute
8. Help Mama with chores
9. Save Matcha from being NTRed by Luoir
10. Destroy the universe while calling Azure cute

*starts blushing*
*gets flustered*
*blushes more*
*blushes even more*
*collapses*

*catches*
*waves hand to give some air*
Well now I should actually add melody and record it then nyahaha!
I'm glad you liked it Your Stabbyness

1. Tell Azure that she's cute
2. Spoil Azure
3. Get stabbed by Azure
4. Flirt with Azure
5. Piss Seymour Off
6. Stab someone, preferably of heroic alignment
7. Call Azure cute
8. Help Mama with chores
9. Save Matcha from being NTRed by Luoir
10. Destroy the universe while calling Azure cute

Fingernails are tasty!!! I refuse to stop biting them~

Stop biting your nails!!! Your hands are precious and need to be taken care of accordingly

What is this~???

You'll see when it's done depending how it goes with the other 3 things that I'm multitasking it could be done today or tomorrow

 

[Azure_Fog]

Small family gatherings are also good. And to be fair, my sister and I just sat on our table and talked with our cool aunt™

Sounds fun~
Although I wouldn’t have anyone to talk to in this situation…
Ehe~ I’m a wallflower for life~

... You don't want to do this, little one. I know what you fear.

Really~ Pretty sure she’s afraid of me~

Today we switched Henlo Your Stabbyness

Morning~

You are cute

No~ I’m~ Not~!!!

Stop biting your nails!!! Your hands are precious and need to be taken care of accordingly

But they’re tasty… and if nail is long I want to bite it…

You'll see when it's done depending how it goes with the other 3 things that I'm multitasking it could be done today or tomorrow

Okay~

 

[DannyTheDaikon]

Really~ Pretty sure she’s afraid of me~

She's not

Morning~

Good morning

No~ I’m~ Not~!!!

Yes~ you~ are~

But they’re tasty… and if nail is long I want to bite it…

It's bad for your teeth and your nails. They'll get very weak and it looks untidy. If you need to bite something bite me instead

Okay~