I'm talking about learning to accept criticism from others without turning arrogant as an author.
When feedback sounds mean rather than constructive and I don't know what to do with my thoughts, I suffer from self-doubt.
I want to have a balanced perspective, but I don't know where to start. Any tips, tricks or insights would be greatly appreciated.
Much has been trolled and said, but let me add to the discussion by narrating to you my most recent experience.
Last two weeks ago, I received a comment in my story in WebNovel saying that my female characters are 'not respecting' my male character's privacy (because of their yandere tendencies), and he's thinking that I thought it was cute. He told me he thinks it's annoying.
My reply? Nah. I didn't think it was worth explaining to him. First, I'm freaking tired with all the bread-kneading I did for the past weeks, and I even got sick due to extreme exhaustion (yeah, I'm not an outdoors type of person). Second, I can't change the mind of a decided person. Third, he's only one among the many (but not too many) that's giving me feedback. Fourth, I don't give a damn if he thinks it's not cute; I'm the author, and I like it that way (aside from that it is in my plans for my story). Fifth, and related to fourth, he's reading it free in the internet. He's not paying me to write for him, so his comment is already invalid (considering my final plans for the work and the other feedbacks I receive).
How did I manage to grow a thick skin? Like I always tell here, I made plans for my story. If the comment isn't in-line with my goal (and I mean the goal, not what I want), then it's automatically considered a nuisance. I also have trusted beta readers (a close friend and my brother) to give me initial impressions on the final manuscript. The thought of 'you can't please everyone' also helps, just make sure you do your best in 'ironing out' your work.
It's like what we say in court: 'with due diligence'. If someone did his part 'with due diligence', one's comment can't easily hurt his work.