How much could I pay you to be friends with strangers? (Poll)

[minacia]

Rawr!

The Magical Girl of Friendship and Magic approaches you and says she wishes to recruit you into her friendship agency. Basically, it is a type of business that sells friends-for-hire (similar to an escort agency), and she would like to recruit you as an employee. For various magical reasons, it's extremely successful and she promises that you will definitely have clients if you choose to join her agency.​

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The Magical Girl explains that the reason why her business is successful because clients aren't actually aware they are being charged for their friendships. A typical sequence of events is like this:​

1. Lonely client wishes that s/he has more friends.
2. Magical Girl magically hears that wish.
3. Magical Girl arranges an employee to approach the client to become their friend.
4. The fee / hourly rate is automatically deducted from the client's future monetary income that they are fated to earn later in life.

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The Magical Girl says that as an employee, your job is to become friends with strangers. You do not get to pick your clients, and the Magical Girl will assign them to you (based on what she believes is most compatible). You must accept at least 80% of your client cases or else you will be fired. You would be expected to approach the client and befriend them. You cannot tell the client that you are employed by the agency, and you cannot tell the client that your friendship is fake (or had false origins). If you violate the secrecy clause, you will lose all your earnings and have your memories wiped. If you decide to leave the company, your memories about the company will be erased.​

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Here is what you would be paid for:​

• Befriending Bonus: You get paid $XXX for reaching out to a stranger, gaining their trust, and befriending them.
• Hourly Rate: You get paid $XX/hour for every hour you spend with the client.
• SMS Rate: The client gets charged $0.XX per online text message they send to you (i.e. via discord, forums, etc)

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There is no minimum amount of time that you need to spend with each client. That said, you get paid for the amount of time you spend with them. Furthermore, if you ignore a client for too long and they end up disliking you because of it, you could run into trouble with the agency.​

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Specifically, there a friendship breakup penalty: ​

• If you unilaterally decide to end a friendship with a client (this includes ghosting)
• If the friendship ends on a sour/bad note that is your fault

The penalty is typically about 75% of the earnings you made with that particular client.​

1. Would you agree to join this agency? Why or why not?

2. Would you be good at befriending strangers?

3. How much would you need to be paid per hour to agree?

4. Is it bad to be friends with someone with ulterior motives? Would you feel guilty about sucking money out of your client's future pocket?

5. Suppose that you have a friend... and you discover that their "best friend" is employed by this agency. Would you tell your friend that their best friend is fake? What if it seems like the two of them genuinely have a lot of fun together, and they seem really close with each other?

6. Suppose that you discover that your best friend is employed by this agency. How would you feel? What if your friend tells you that they genuinely became friends with you after all the time you spent together... and they couldn't say anything without getting their memories of you wiped?

 

[Leti]

I already have enough best friends. I don't need more. They are called anxiety, depression, loneliness, and overthinking.

 

[binarysoap]

6. Suppose that you discover that your best friend is employed by this agency. How would you feel?

Whoa, my right hand is employed by the agency? How is this possible?! How come I don't get a cut.

 

[TheMangaGod]

I'd go with $50/hour. Enough to earn a living but not enough that I would feel like I was taking advantage. I'd only spend about 1-2 hours per client per week so I don't negatively affect their future earnings too much. Plus most friends in life are fairly similar to this. If you think about it most of your friends were because of meeting them at work and most of them will not continue to be friends when you leave said job. Not all of course but generally. That's not to say that they aren't important of course but the mindset is that it doesn't really matter how friendships start as long as you enjoy each other's company. So:

1. Yes I would join the agency because I don't feel that the reason a friendship is started is as important as the time spent enjoying each other's company.
2. Possibly? I used to be much better at it so the first few might be awkward but I think I'd improve.
3. $50
4. No, just do it in moderation.
5. No, like I said the important part is whether they enjoy their time together not how it started.
6. I wouldn't be upset. Might ask why they didn't take me out to movie's more often though... lol

 

[ArcadiaBlade]

I actually kinda wrote something like this but its instead being lovers. I never posted it here but its on another site since i do not plan on posting until i finish writing it.

1. Would you agree to join this agency? Why or why not?

Yeah? As long as i paid well, i can make him even have a 100 friends. Its not hard even for a loner like me who might be lacking in communication but making friends is not that hard, trying to make a long lasting friendships though, that might be a problem.

2. Would you be good at befriending strangers?

Yeah. I've been talking to not only normal people but also abnormal people as well. Those who tried to commit suicide, having problems in their marriage life or even an old man who basically likes telling stories and rambles on and on. Even an annoying person, i would still befriend and can tolerate since i do not want to be a bad person who acts like a scumbag.

3. How much would you need to be paid per hour to agree?

Depends on how much. Just not be too low that i'm basically working for free.

4. Is it bad to be friends with someone with ulterior motives? Would you feel guilty about sucking money out of your client's future pocket?

Nope. Unless it brings hard to not only yourself but for others as well. I do not feel guilty when i can work it off by making the client as happy as i can and skilled in making him feel happy about himself. Thats how i worked through edgy people to stop their suicide attempts. Just be a helpful person and stand by that person even on the toughest of times.

5. Suppose that you have a friend... and you discover that their "best friend" is employed by this agency. Would you tell your friend that their best friend is fake? What if it seems like the two of them genuinely have a lot of fun together, and they seem really close with each other?

Nope. If he brings harm to my friend, we would talk in a different wat but if not, i'm happy and will comfort my friend when the time comes.

6. Suppose that you discover that your best friend is employed by this agency. How would you feel? What if your friend tells you that they genuinely became friends with you after all the time you spent together... and they couldn't say anything without getting their memories of you wiped?

I would feel sad and ask that if he was happy to be friends with me. I prefer that he would still be friends, even if he isn't paid and still hang out normally.

 

[Johgral]

I think it already exist while you pay upfront (there is a gamer girl to play with you, I don't know if it was put in place) and you can already do this artificially if you have enough social skill by going to people who are obligated (by their work) or want to be nice.

1. I would join because I like money and it look like a good job. I wouldn't want to have to calculate the time I pass with him/her and would do everything to abolish this law ''The penalty is typically about 75% of the earnings you made with that particular client.''
2.No i suck at befriending and keeping a contact but I can at least try.
3. Between $40-50/hour to live comfortably.
4.Yes, I know I would have a different attitude with him/her and wouldn't be able to tell frankly things (critic), nor expose things of myself who could put him farther from me (as I benefit from it). And it depend on the number of people engaged by the society more than two hired friends for one person would be too much. He also should not need the money I take from him (if he is in debt or live a life of misery in the future).
5. I would tell the hired person and permit myself a veto in their friendship if I find something strange or unhealthy.
6. I would be angry if I had a healthy lifestyle with my own circle of friends even before he came and he did integrate himself while I had no need of him as it ask effort from the two side for friendship. I would at the very least think back all his action and were he could have abused of me (and were I could have been border line and he had been obligated to not act up).
PS:If he didn't pay more than 60% of time the bill of the shared activity, he is an asshole.


There is a short film in French like this with 2 horrible old married people who buy friends (a young couple). The old couple are boring and dumb, they put their brought friends in a closet and when the old man become a bit too insistent on swinging (which need the accord of the brought friends) the young couple refuse and want to kill the old married couple but they were filmed so they are put back to sale and the old couple buy dvd.

 

[Vaxel00]

The ghosting clause already disqualifies me. I've done it before.

 

[K5Rakitan]

I'm assuming there's no pandemic in this world. Otherwise, I want quadruple hazard pay.