Critically, my elder sister is desperate enough to believe that she's made 'the right choice' for once in her sordid life, and her distorted sense of pride will not allow for her to admit her husband's wrongdoings to herself (and not even her 2 now adult children seem to be willing to press the other matters, despite her still having another niece and a nephew of mine under her 'wing': this much I've tried substantially to affect, but it unfortunately came to no success (could never convince parents or the eldest niece to take the others in, and I couldn't do it myself because those would have been the necessary witnesses to have affected changes in the situation)). Took her 13 years of drunken abuse last time to divorce, and who can say how many years it'll take her this time... but I personally suspect she never will. Her psychology is too tied to the matter, and if she actually frees herself of its influence upon her: she will be lost. She'd have to come to grips with having 'wasted' nearly 25 years of her life, and her entire worldview would have to change... therefore: no change is likely.
My elder sister is the kind of person to exact her irritation at her children through strange punishments. One of her exhibited behaviors is she'll spend a great deal of money on a dog for one of her children (500$-3000$), only to then 'take it away' once her children do something which interferes with her preferred direction/interpretation of reality. For instance: I'm sure that my niece's newest dog will soon be delivered 'to the farm' where all good animals go when their owners feel a skosh vexed... after all, it was that niece who 'snitched' this time.
That isn't to say I think she deserves what she's getting, because you're quite right: it's unthinkable that someone should be made to endure such abuse under any circumstances... and it is horrible that such abuse should be allowed to continue whatsoever. However, it is very much to say that despite having heard about that terrible situation and then watching my very own mother cry because one of my elder brothers called her to berate her for calling the police because one of my nieces was in tears over the issue: I simply cannot feel anything for this situation, for it is 'normal' when compared to all of those which came before it, and which didn't manage somehow to elicit at least an equivalent response.
I used to maintain that concern in me (for my elder sister, or my nieces), but it's entirely worn off over the years. So many animals walked into that house alive and well and came out dead or broken (not necessarily due to my sister's direct physical actions, but more due to the same gross negligence and dispassion she afforded to her daughters), which is to say nothing of her effect upon my nieces over the years (2 broken adults who now exhibit many smaller examples of her more negative behaviors, and one broken teenager who will never be able to live on her own entirely). I would weep for my nephew as well, but I've barely met him, because my elder sister has been entirely alienated from me (bad influence on her daughters she said... well, joke's on her: all three of them turned out to be gay even without my 'assistance') since I was less than half the age I am now.
There's no feeling that I can express towards my elder sister's plight (and I've only anger left for how my nieces have been treated), and I believe that it was probably being treated like some sort of child molester/predator by her after I fully socially transitioned at 13 (no support beyond being 'acceptable' to the boys around, fam) which robbed most-all of my ability to empathize with her endlessly dreadful situation (was married to the other guy at that time. Oddly, in the gap between her marriages she settled down considerably, and even gave me a lift home from the local college once! That was a shock, getting accepted first by my elder sister of all people in my family! But she later doubled then tripled the dosage of nasty-to-me after her second shotgun wedding where none of her family was invited, so I simply cannot understand what that short phase was about. I suspect it's because the eldest sibling (my brother) came out as gay in that span of time between abusive jerks). There's an age divide of almost 15 years between us, and my relationship with most of the entire upper group of siblings (10-17 years older) is poor. They 'support' each other largely, though they've each such a divisive element to them that as often as they will stand to 'support' each others worst impulses: they will also abandon each other at a moment's offense, and goodness forbid they try to do *anything* the rest aren't keen on... probably why it took my brother like 17 years of marriage to a woman as old as my parents to actually declare his homosexuality, and our parents later voted down the Alaska gay-marriage bill that year... such support they felt for only their singular 'successful' child.
In a clinical sort of way: it's fascinating to observe a family that has every reason to succeed (wealthy enough, healthy enough, hard-working enough) and still fails so drastically on an interpesonal level, with broken and pretentious relationships only. More emotionally speaking: it's terribly sad to witness my elder siblings, and even my singular younger one. 5 broken adults, none of which are very happy people, all of which largely inflict their suffering upon themselves, and each of which has had divorce in their life with 'long term' partners.
