Hit me with your best pun

[gaylolis]

Why is Orca called the Killer Whale?

Because Killer Queen is already taken by Araki.

Spoiler

Not sure if that's a pun though

 

[Generic.Archdemon]

 

[Not_A_Symphony]

I'm just dying Every time I check the thread I die #I'vecreatedamonster

 

[gaylolis]

Mount Olympus

Mount Olympull

 

[Generic.Archdemon]

 

[LilTV1155]

What do you call it when a smiley girl show up with a ball and chain?
Nutsacking? No.
Ball busting? No.
Scum beating? No.
Anal play? Wrong.

Answer: Girl got Wrecking Ball !​

For whacking people.​

 

[CadmarLegend]

I didn't know why the ball was getting bigger.

Then it hit me.

 

[Lorelliad]

 

[T.K._Paradox]

Why did the hooker want to have sex?

Because she was Whoreny.

 

[SternenklarenRitter]

My amphibole thinks I'm attractive. It's cummingtonite watching me from my table.

A sodium ion runs into a bar. "Someone just stole my electron!" "Are you sure?" asks the bartender. "I'm positive"

What did the doe say when she walked out of the forest? "Gee, I'll never do that for two bucks again."

"Give it to me straight doctor. Am I going to die?" "That's the last thing you have to worry about!"

Two dudes walk into a bar. "I'll have H2O" says the first. "I'll have H2O too" says the second. The first has his thirst quenched, but the second one dies of peroxide poisoning.

 

[CadmarLegend]

well, one more from me:

If april showers bring may flowers, what do may flowers bring?

pilgrims.

 

[Generic.Archdemon]

well, one more from me:

Took me a little bit of american history trival gymnastics to get that one, but got there in the end.

 

[GodlessEmperor]

This thread is my sleep paralysis demon.

 

[Cipiteca396]

This thread is my sleep paralysis demon.

Then if you tie it in a knot, you should be able to sleep better, right?

 

[LostLibrarian]

I accidentally swallowed a bunch of scrabble pieces.
My next trip to the bathroom could spell disaster...

 

[CadmarLegend]

Why did Adele cross the road? To say hello from the other side.

Spoiler

Her song "Hello" has this awesome line called "Hello from the other siiide">

I want to be cremated as it is my last hope for a smoking hot body.

My grandpa has the heart of the lion and a lifetime ban from the zoo.

My ex-wife still misses me. But her aim is starting to improve!

 

[Generic.Archdemon]

 

[Generic.Archdemon]

 

[Omnifarious]

 

[BearlyAlive]

This whole thread, it's pure torture. What did we do to deserve this punishment?