My life is empty. My friends mock me, when I speak to them about writing, and I can't think about anything else, but writing. I don't want children, I don't want a husband, and I am beginning to think I don't want friends. I view my job as a day care, where I do stuff when there is something to do. I didn't imagine life like this, while I was growing up. If it isn't for writing, I think I won't be able to wake up every morning. (It has gotten worse, since I gave up chocolate. Before, I could get a quick fix of some cocoa goodness. Not anymore.)
i personally don't even try making friends anymore. like hans said, they're not your real friends. you can try cutting them off from your life bit by bit.
i find that my life's much better if i didn't rely on interacting with other humans for my well-being. people had many other things to care about and I know I'm not one of them.
even if I had time, I will not care for others first, but myself.
that's why i often think of writing not as a pursuit to write stories, but as a learning process to better my own life. that way, i eventually don't have to rely on anyone to solve my problems. no need to compromise my real self at all and just live at my own pace.
an important thing i learned today was when i had free time at work, i open the freepiano software and try to play my favorite songs with the limited amount of keys and ease of use. i realized that the process of learning might be about exploring all the things i can comfortably do with my limited abilities. starting with the easiest step, nothing to do with surpassing my limits, but it's simply learning in-depth about my comfort zone.
i tried applying them to all kinds of situations in my life.
just walk slowly and take the smallest step that i can. if i couldn't in a particular path, i just take the ones i can.
i think you did a good job by coming forth with your problems. it also helps me formulating what i learned today. hope your life only goes better from now on.