The bible is a bad novel

[Macha]

Only reason why it isn't a 1 is because John the Baptist is the coolest man I've seen.

That and sometimes the translations are hilarious.

 

[Leti]

I personally think that the Bible is a one giant fanfiction compilation of a many fanfictions that are based loosely on a real story that gotten out out of hand by the sheer popularity of it. While the core teachings were left as is, the constant adding of the lore had made the story unrecognisable from what the first book was, if it ever existed.

So while it's a bad novel to you, it's all because of "corporate meddling", let's put that way, it became what we have right now.

The Romans should have focused on making pasta. Instead of whatever they were doing with the gospel.

 

[Redemit]

Reading the bible and I find Jesus to be rather a 'party person' (contrary to what Puritans always love to portray him). Like, he's always present in parties/celebrations where there are lots of 'sinners' and 'crooks'. And yeah, I believe that's what attracted people to him; he can't be found secluding himself in some lonely place all the time, he's going where his ministry needs him.

Also when Your party runs out of wine Jesus has got you covered

The "good" and the "sinless" (yes I know there's no such thing) aren't the one's who most desperately need salvation Jesus actively sought out the lowest of low to save

 

[gaylolis]

Reading the bible and I find Jesus to be rather a 'party person' (contrary to what Puritans always love to portray him). Like, he's always present in parties/celebrations where there are lots of 'sinners' and 'crooks'. And yeah, I believe that's what attracted people to him; he can't be found secluding himself in some lonely place all the time, he's going where his ministry needs him.

so basically this

 

[Deleted member 54065]

so basically this

I mean, I have no qualms with this version of Jesus. Between a Puritan Jesus and a party Jesus, the latter is approachable and has more reasons for people to come to him.

Celebrating parties is not sin in itself. Doing bad stuff is.

Also when Your party runs out of wine Jesus has got you covered

The "good" and the "sinless" (yes I know there's no such thing) aren't the one's who most desperately need salvation Jesus actively sought out the lowest of low to save

Yep, that's the implication of his first miracle, the 'Wedding at Cana'. Basically, one of the perspectives I learned about him in that part of the gospels is that, Jesus cares even for the most mundane things (what the heck's the connection of a wedding celebration to saving people from sin anyway?) and he's not averted to merry-making (proof is the water he turned to wine).

He wants people to enjoy things in life, as long as nothing bad (no sin committed) is happening. Problem is, with all the church stuff, traditions and politics, Christianity has devolved into a set of rigid--and often limiting--religious rules for people to obey.

I often hear that if the biblical Jesus is alive today, he'd be facing a cancel squad for his activism against religious and societal leaders. Well that's only a what-if.

Anyway, I apologize if I sound like proselytising. I don't; and I never intend to. I'm just sharing stuff I learned from our pastors. (I adhere to the evangelical side of Protestant Christianity.)

 

[bulmabriefs144]

Well, and Jesus even said that ppl would look at him and say "He is a glutton and a drunk, a friend of tax collectors and sinners."

Basically at the time, he had more messed up reputation than Trump (that's saying something).

Although personally when I'm writing religious stuff, I try to find sonething funny to comment on. Or something badass about the text.
Fight of the Gods, that street fighting game with Buddha, Thor, and Jesus, that's a good example of the sort of humor I want. Obviously I don't get offended easily.

That and sometimes the translations are hilarious.

I really like this. Although the KJV also had spellings that are no longer used, and compounded together words like loving-kindness.

 

[J_Chemist]

I'm surprised about the number of Christians (count me in) I see in this thread, considering a lot here hates religious stuff.

When it's stuffed down your throat as a kid, it's hard not to at least know things.

It also makes the jokes funnier.

 

[Deleted member 54065]

When it's stuffed down your throat as a kid, it's hard not to at least know things.

It also makes the jokes funnier.

Aren't we all? Though with deeper understanding of Christianity, I learned to accept people and their flaws, instead of shunning them.

 

[Paul_Tromba]

Aren't we all? Though with deeper understanding of Christianity, I learned to accept people and their flaws, instead of shunning them.

Agreed.

 

[Lloyd]

Aren't we all? Though with deeper understanding of Christianity, I learned to accept people and their flaws, instead of shunning them.

This is completely false. Christianity teaches us exactly the opposite. We must love everyone, but do not accept their sins. Jesus came not to unite, but to divide, to separate the wheat from the chaff. He did not preach unconditional peace and acceptance. There are times when you must let the dead lay with the dead and sell your cloak to buy a sword. We must save every soul we can, not by accepting sin and being damned, but by supporting one another to live virtuously. It is better to punish or shun those who sin against god than to let them be damned for all eternity.

 

[Deleted member 54065]

This is completely false. Christianity teaches us exactly the opposite. We must love everyone, but do not accept their sins. Jesus came not to unite, but to divide, to separate the wheat from the chaff. He did not preach unconditional peace and acceptance. There are times when you must let the dead lay with the dead and sell your cloak to buy a sword. We must save every soul we can, not by accepting sin and being damned, but by supporting one another to live virtuously. It is better to punish or shun those who sin against god than to let them be damned for all eternity.

Suit yourself, edgy buddy.

 

[Lloyd]

Suit yourself, edgy buddy.

I encourage you to actually read the bible, all this stuff is in there. It's not edgy. It's the truth.
Matthew 10:34
Do not assume that I have come to bring peace to the earth; I have not come to bring peace, but a sword.
For I have come to set a man against his father, and a daughter against her mother, and a daughter-in-law against her mother-in-law.

 

[CadmarLegend]

How many novels have as many people writing different chapters / story arcs like the bible does? Also, big parts of it are a collection of poetry / proverbs.

Also, to be fair the original audience is 1st century humanity. The culture at the time was very different.

It can be summarized quite easily in modern day’s words. In fact, I could reduce the entirety of the Bible, and still keep all of its morals and lessons.

Don’t be a [stupid, rebellious, backstabbing, etc.] dick

 

[Lloyd]

It can be summarized quite easily in modern day’s words. In fact, I could reduce the entirety of the Bible, and still keep all of its morals and lessons.

It's actually more like always do the right thing, even if other people hate you for it (they will). So actually if people are calling you a dick you might just be doing something correct.
John 15:18
If the world hates you, remember that it hated me first.

 

[Deleted member 54065]

I encourage you to actually read the bible, all this stuff is in there. It's not edgy. It's the truth.
Matthew 10:34
Do not assume that I have come to bring peace to the earth; I have not come to bring peace, but a sword.
For I have come to set a man against his father, and a daughter against her mother, and a daughter-in-law against her mother-in-law.

Dude, I read the bible, and I'm no pastor/religious scholar to debate on that matter with you. I'm a teacher, a lawyer, a baker, and an author/illustrator. Nowhere in my qualifications indicate I'm a person of religion, so I know I'm not an authority on this, hence I won't speak.

This talk with you is over. You need some chill, edgy dude. So again, suit yourself.

 

[Prince_Azmiran_Myrian]

It can be summarized quite easily in modern day’s words. In fact, I could reduce the entirety of the Bible, and still keep all of its morals and lessons.

I think its more like: God is awesome, you and all people are awful, so accept his love and truth, and repent and follow his ways instead of your own.

 

[georgelee5786]

Also when Your party runs out of wine Jesus has got you covered

The "good" and the "sinless" (yes I know there's no such thing) aren't the one's who most desperately need salvation Jesus actively sought out the lowest of low to save

Yup. Luke 15:7: I tell you that in the same way there will be more rejoicing in heaven over one sinner who repents than over ninety-nine righteous persons who do not need to repent.

 

[BearlyAlive]

Season one was okay, but after they turned the whole show around to pander to modern audiences, focused on a single overpowered protagonist and filled the show with unnessecary drama and teen angst it went downhill fast. They really should have sticked to the whole "fire and sword" shtick from season one...

They really failed to redeem the antagonistic force known as "god" in the series; just because he pregged a virgin and cucked a poor mason he suddenly 180°ed from a out-of-paradise-kicking, child-murdering, world-flooding asshole into a symbol of love and virtue with no further explanation tagged on...

Jesus as a protagonist has no flaws outside of his long respawn times, his buddies didn't get enough screentime, the implied romance with that girl (don't even remember her name, that's how much screentime she got) was was executed terribly and the "antagonists" were non-existent until the end where they pulled a diabolus ex machina to drive home "THE MESSAGE"...

 

[Paul_Tromba]

Season one was okay, but after they turned the whole show around to pander to modern audiences, focused on a single overpowered protagonist and filled the show with unnessecary drama and teen angst it went downhill fast. They really should have sticked to the whole "fire and sword" shtick from season one...

They really failed to redeem the antagonistic force known as "god" in the series; just because he pregged a virgin and cucked a poor mason he suddenly 180°ed from a out-of-paradise-kicking, child-murdering, world-flooding asshole into a symbol of love and virtue with no further explanation tagged on...

Jesus as a protagonist has no flaws outside of his long respawn times, his buddies didn't get enough screentime, the implied romance with that girl (don't even remember her name, that's how much screentime she got) was was executed terribly and the "antagonists" were non-existent until the end where they pulled a diabolus ex machina to drive home "THE MESSAGE"...

I don't think you understood the old testament. God had allowed humans to do as they pleased for a long time as they had free will but he only killed or had someone else kill because they were so unrighteous that he couldn't let them continue as they were. The flood was the result of angels breeding with humans to the point that it had created nephilim or giants depending and the only true have human bloodline was Noah and his family.second, the old testament didn't focus on a single protagonist but rather, a lot of priests, prophets, and people who were utilized for God's purposes. Such as, creating a nation for his people on earth, protecting them, and punishing them if they started being evil, forgiving them as soon as they turned back to God. A lot of the fire and sword stuff was in response to evil deeds that humans caused by their own hands

The new testament is a finalized prophecy of old testament prophecies written hundreds and thousands of years before, where the son of God would become the salvation for the whole world in it's sin which was given to humanity upon eating the forbidden fruit. Thus, saving all who accept him as savior from eternal death. He is overpowered because he is both God and man, but humbled himself to the life of a working man as a sign of compassion for those less fortunate. Lastly, after his death and resurrection, his Apostles spread the word of God to any that they could, and is the mission of all Christians to spread the word to all of the world.

God gave us free will so that we could choose to have love and faith of our own will. Though with the options of love and faith, there is also the option of hate and self-loving desires. If you had a child and they hurt someone on purpose, would you not punish them as a result? God is like a parent whom has given His children the ability to Choose their own path, only punishing them out of a duty to punish unrighteous acts with a punishment equal to the sins committed.

 

[BearlyAlive]

TL;DR

Still bad writing if the readers can't follow the plot and need append material to understand everything