Post your female character and I'll tell you what I think of her from my male reader's perspective

[Agentt]

You gave me 5 sentences!! I couldn't flesh her out and show you her beauty! *grabs by the shoulders and shakes tt-chan mercilessly* xD

On a more upbeat note though, thank you very much for the feedback.

(((*.*-*.*)))
Gimme more then. Nap overestimated his abilty

 

[AhoDesuGa]

(((*.*-*.*)))
Gimme more then. Nap overestimated his abilty

He really did fufufu.

To give you more is a bit... I am a little scarred from your opinion atm~

 

[Agentt]

He really did fufufu.

To give you more is a bit... I am a little scarred from your opinion atm~

*snuggles*
:3
Really?

 

[AhoDesuGa]

*snuggles*
:3
Really?

*pat pat* I am traumatised~ xD

 

[Agentt]

*pat pat* I am traumatised~ xD

m(_ _)m
I apologise

 

[AhoDesuGa]

m(_ _)m
I apologise

Hehehe~ thanks~

 

[Napelynn]

Name: Odette
Visuals: Black hair and black eyes. 5"10. Wears glasses.
Description: Mute 25 year old who works with deaf children. she's fiery and passionate despite the common assumption that mute folk tend to lean towards subdued character traits. Her hobbies include painting, gardening and boxing. She's very thoughtful, having grown up unable to voice all her opinions.

Be as harsh as you need to be.

She seems boring. It’s nice that she’s passionate even though she is mute, but other than that I don’t see anything interesting about her. Like Agentt said, she needs some flaws.

 

[AhoDesuGa]

She seems boring. It’s nice that she’s passionate even though she is mute, but other than that I don’t see anything interesting about her. Like Agentt said, she needs some flaws.

You gave me five sentences!

 

[Napelynn]

You gave me five sentences!

You could have said

She is a passionate, thoughtful, and mute 25 year old that works with deaf children. She enjoys gardening, painting and boxing.

And then you would have 3 extra sentences.

 

[SailusGebel]

Name: Odette
Visuals: Black hair and black eyes. 5"10. Wears glasses.
Description: Mute 25 year old who works with deaf children. she's fiery and passionate despite the common assumption that mute folk tend to lean towards subdued character traits. Her hobbies include painting, gardening and boxing. She's very thoughtful, having grown up unable to voice all her opinions.

Be as harsh as you need to be.

For me, it's her visuals that are boring. Can you give me a more detailed description?

 

[BenJepheneT]

Name: The Mechanic

Visual: Pretty plain-faced, but seen often with a confident expression. Her eyes are a bit special: purple pupils with a dark outline. Nothing much besides that; average height, waist, bust. She's got fair, pale skin and a blonde ponytail. You'd be hard-pressed to find her in anything but her uniform: plaid-shirt and denim overalls. Boots may vary.

Wait a minute, I've got a fucking image, why the word salad?

Description (man fuck these 5 sentences rules):

Cheeky, is her personality. Loving and caring of her husband too (the mega autist with prosthetic legs, pictured behind).

VERY proficient with anything related to engineering and mechanics as she is a hardware store owner, after all.

She's mute but she's very concise; she can get her points across using simple hand gestures and signals.

Pretty fucking horny at times.

 

[LoliGent]

Ah! So it did come to pass! The handsome one blessed you with your request! Then so it shall be that I will share the female lead of my story here. Though the thing is, the handsome one blessed me with some fanart but I didn't get any actual feedback. Well, I did get some from K5, but... I don't even know what to make of it. So maybe instead, I can get some fanart for my Lucy instead, oh handsome one?

Anyways, on to the my FL.

Name: Lucy

Visuals:

Description:

• She is the reincarnation of a medieval peasant girl named Lucile who fell in love and was to wed a 27 year old noble at the age of 16.
• Currently attending middle school, though her age I'm leaving ambiguous.
• Very boisterous, energetic, passionate, friendly, likes sports and watching movies, and can get pretty angry and aggressive at times as she tends to have a bit of an authority complex.
• Had the same dreams as the ML and unlike him, has embraced the dreams as destiny and wants to pursue a relationship with him in the current.
• Her parents are getting a divorce and she overheard them saying that neither wants custody of her, leaving her very dejected and questioning what love truly is.

Like before, still working on it but this is pretty much the character in a nutshell.

Here is the ML for comparison: https://forum.scribblehub.com/threa...e-readers-perspective.5647/page-2#post-138108

Name: The Mechanic

Visual: Pretty plain-faced, but seen often with a confident expression. Her eyes are a bit special: purple pupils with a dark outline. Nothing much besides that; average height, waist, bust. She's got fair, pale skin and a blonde ponytail. You'd be hard-pressed to find her in anything but her uniform: plaid-shirt and denim overalls. Boots may vary.

Wait a minute, I've got a fucking image, why the word salad?

Description (man fuck these 5 sentences rules):

Cheeky, is her personality. Loving and caring of her husband too (the mega autist with prosthetic legs, pictured behind).

VERY proficient with anything related to engineering and mechanics as she is a hardware store owner, after all.

She's mute but she's very concise; she can get her points across using simple hand gestures and signals.

Pretty fucking horny at times.

I like this character. She sounds so sweet and loving, but also energetic and playful. And I recalled you said you can't draw her face. I think you got it spot on for her personality. Good job, I love her!

 

[SailusGebel]

Ah! So it did come to pass! The handsome one blessed you with your request! Then so it shall be that I will share the female lead of my story here. Though the thing is, the handsome one blessed me with some fanart but I didn't get any actual feedback. Well, I did get some from K5, but... I don't even know what to make of it. So maybe instead, I can get some fanart for my Lucy instead, oh handsome one?

Anyways, on to the my FL.

Name: Lucy

Visuals: View attachment 7984



Description:

• She is the reincarnation of a medieval peasant girl named Lucile who fell in love and was to wed a 27 year old noble at the age of 16.
• Currently attending middle school, though her age I'm leaving ambiguous.
• Very boisterous, energetic, passionate, and friendly.
• Had the same dreams as the ML and unlike him, has embraced the dreams as destiny and wants to pursue a relationship with him in the current.
• Her parents are getting a divorce and she overheard them saying that neither wants custody of her, leaving her very dejected and questioning what love truly is.

Like before, still working on it but this is pretty much the character in a nutshell.

What about hobbies, flaws?

 

[LoliGent]

What about hobbies, flaws?

Updated to include some other aspects of her.

 

[SailusGebel]

Updated to include some other aspects of her.

Don't know about others, but I feel she lacks some depth. The number of flaws isn't enough for my taste. Does she have an authority complex due to an older sister\eldest child\mother complex? I mean, being aggressive as she protects her ducklings\chicks doesn't sound much of a flaw to me. From where does her authority complex goes? Does she think that she is smarter than others? Thus, they must listen to her. Because she knows how to do something 'better.' Or she has authority complex because of self-entitlement?

What about her reincarnation? Did she reincarnate as a child? I mean, she started living in a modern world from zero to nth years old? Did it affect her personality in any way?

Not trying to be a jerk here. I'm asking these questions expecting that you will answer and give more info about the character. For me, five sentences can't make it. I can only think of her as dull and generic right now.

And now I'm trying to be a jerk. Not a fan of her visuals\looks.

 

[LoliGent]

I'll try to answer the best I can but be aware that she, along with everything is still a WIP. And yes, 5 sentences is quite restrictive, but I believe this is what is known as an elevator pitch so I tried to compress the following so it would fit. Allow me to elaborate on what I have so far:

The theme surrounding her, and perhaps even the work itself, is the lack of love. Her parents are getting a divorce and she overhears them saying that neither wants custody of her. This leads her to realize that her parents never really wanted her as she always noticed a sort of distance between her and her parents. She wasn't getting the love she needs and tried to fill that void with others such as her friends and teachers. She thought that doing well in school would maker her parents love her but they just simply approve of her. If she does bad, then they get all authoritarian on her, so she tries really hard to do well in school. This has lead the approval from the school and decides to take charge of any situation, all just to get the love she desires. In reality, she just wants her parents to lover her like they should.

As for the reincarnation, she was born 10 years after her reincarnated mate and she's been having the same dreams of the medieval couple just like the ML. Unlike him, she does believe it is her destiny to be with him. Add to that the lack of love from her parents and she's pretty desperate to get with him, thinking he is what will fill that void.

Now we come to the part where I have not actually planned out so this is subject to change.

I think that if her parents loved her like they should, she would not have this strong desire to be loved and thus would probably assume the dreams were nothing more than that, like the ML. She'd probably meet up with him at the current time and be rational about the situation, as in, she'd probably wait till she grew up to be with him. But because that's not the situation, she's really desperate to have that void filled and her authoritative nature just gets in her way of rational thinking. But she is not without logic. She can, and will, come to terms that she can't be with him at the moment, but because she can't give up on him, will give him 4 challenges to prove his love for her, which will be the bulk of the story.

That's pretty much all I have for her at the moment. Again, she is a WIP as everything is currently in the planning stages.

 

[EternalSunset0]

Name: The Mechanic

Visual: Pretty plain-faced, but seen often with a confident expression. Her eyes are a bit special: purple pupils with a dark outline. Nothing much besides that; average height, waist, bust. She's got fair, pale skin and a blonde ponytail. You'd be hard-pressed to find her in anything but her uniform: plaid-shirt and denim overalls. Boots may vary.

Wait a minute, I've got a fucking image, why the word salad?

Description (man fuck these 5 sentences rules):

Cheeky, is her personality. Loving and caring of her husband too (the mega autist with prosthetic legs, pictured behind).

VERY proficient with anything related to engineering and mechanics as she is a hardware store owner, after all.

She's mute but she's very concise; she can get her points across using simple hand gestures and signals.

Pretty fucking horny at times.

I like her. Seems to be those super-efficient yet stoic types based on the description. I feel that the surprisingly horny side is a plus in my book. I feel like that will be a source of a lot of comedy for me.

 

[SailusGebel]

I'll try to answer the best I can but be aware that she, along with everything is still a WIP. And yes, 5 sentences is quite restrictive, but I believe this is what is known as an elevator pitch so I tried to compress the following so it would fit. Allow me to elaborate on what I have so far:

The theme surrounding her, and perhaps even the work itself, is the lack of love. Her parents are getting a divorce and she overhears them saying that neither wants custody of her. This leads her to realize that her parents never really wanted her as she always noticed a sort of distance between her and her parents. She wasn't getting the love she needs and tried to fill that void with others such as her friends and teachers. She thought that doing well in school would maker her parents love her but they just simply approve of her. If she does bad, then they get all authoritarian on her, so she tries really hard to do well in school. This has lead the approval from the school and decides to take charge of any situation, all just to get the love she desires. In reality, she just wants her parents to lover her like they should.

As for the reincarnation, she was born 10 years after her reincarnated mate and she's been having the same dreams of the medieval couple just like the ML. Unlike him, she does believe it is her destiny to be with him. Add to that the lack of love from her parents and she's pretty desperate to get with him, thinking he is what will fill that void.

Now we come to the part where I have not actually planned out so this is subject to change.

I think that if her parents loved her like they should, she would not have this strong desire to be loved and thus would probably assume the dreams were nothing more than that, like the ML. She'd probably meet up with him at the current time and be rational about the situation, as in, she'd probably wait till she grew up to be with him. But because that's not the situation, she's really desperate to have that void filled and her authoritative nature just gets in her way of rational thinking. But she is not without logic. She can, and will, come to terms that she can't be with him at the moment, but because she can't give up on him, will give him 4 challenges to prove his love for her, which will be the bulk of the story.

That's pretty much all I have for her at the moment. Again, she is a WIP as everything is currently in the planning stages.

That's much better, and I can say I like the character.

 

[LoliGent]

Thanks... even if you don't like how she looks. You got any suggestions for her design?

 

[SailusGebel]

Thanks... even if you don't like how she looks. You got any suggestions for her design?

I don't think so? If she is trying to make others love her by being obedient, then she must look prim and proper. And she must try to fit the image of an ideal student\daughter. So perhaps she shouldn't use makeup\accesories? If you are going dark, you can always add scars that are unseen by others. She scars herself to somehow let her inner desire to beautify herself out. Or she punishes herself for being non-obedient stuff like that. You can add a flaw in her appearance that either produced a complex, OR, on the other hand, the said flaw can add a certain charm to her, and she likes it. Bushy eyebrows? Protruding canines? A big\roman nose? Overly long eyelashes? A mole\birthmark? There is a lot of stuff to choose from. Anyway, don't take my rant close to your heart. It's a matter of personal preferences, and I'm very subjective when I talk about appearances.

Name: Watanabe Kyoko

Visuals: a tall, slender woman with thick black hair and has bangs that almost covers her eyes. Prefers to wear simple yet fashionable clothing during dates. Has a rather good proportion on her body and a shy, innocent looking face.

Description: An earnest, hard working office staff who is married to Murata Azai, a high level executive from another company.

Even though, she discovered her husband is a closet pervert and was the one who secretly groped her breasts in the Haunted House from their amusement park date. She didnt confront him about it but rather wrote what she really thinks about him in her diary.

A clumsy and yet adorable woman who will do anything to please her husband.

She sounds more like a function than an actual character. It's like her function is to love her husband thus she loves him. Also, the stuff about her husband being a closet pervert is confusing as hell. They are married, right? They can easily make love, right? Sooo, he can actually grope her outdoors, right? Or they are kind of husband and wife that have sex under the blanket. With no lightning and only in a missionary position.
What about flaws and hobbies? Clumsy isn't making it for me. Maybe if I get to know a bit of her background, it will help. So far, she is a function.

As for her visuals, well, you even made a Japanese name for her. Her looks are inspired by manga characters, right? Not digging it. The sixth character in this thread has long dark hair. Like, really? Her visuals may as well suit the story, theme, and background. Still, it's getting a bit too bland already.

If you can perhaps elaborate and give more description on both her character background and looks. Then, and only then, I will be able to form a more proper, complete opinion. It's up to you though, if you want it or not.