BenJepheneT

BenJepheneT

Light Up Gold - Parquet Courts
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  • BenJepheneT
    russian civilians are fucked.

    government in no way represents their best interest, their currency is skydiving, the rest of the world is cutting off online services to them from entertainment to trading, and some with terminal brain damage are equating plain Babushkas to the Russian military like Nazis in 1940 Germans just by national association.
    BenJepheneT
    Today my co-worker dogged on me for skipping lunch due to my hanging off a straining budget and it took every fibre of my being to hold off from telling Captain Hamplanet to skip the queue to the buffet and hang himself off a straining noose
    • Like
    Reactions: K5Rakitan
    BenJepheneT
    BenJepheneT
    Though with the amount of lard The Notorious B.M.I sweats out everyday the rope is just gonna slip off his neck anyway
    BenJepheneT
    The fact that Jesus looked down and saw a million young lads jack off to the thought of brolic black men violently fucking their mothers/girlfriends and still chose to love them is the pinnacle of forgiveness imo
    • Like
    • Haha
    Reactions: Paul_Tromba and Amok
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    Amok
    i once thought about my dog shoving into jesus's holy ass and my balls got smited off so not that forgiving i'd say
    BenJepheneT
    BenJepheneT
    I think that's less of Jesus's responsibility and more of your dog's natural, righteous reaction
    BenJepheneT
    Visited my grandfather today and he referred to me as "bro" and in that split second I saw my life flash before my eyes in a whiplash as he gave me the biggest "see, I keep up with the kids too" grin I've ever seen
    Ai-chan
    Ai-chan
    You're indonesia, right? Or was it malaysia? Or singapore? Being called 'abang' is not a big deal if you're the big brother of someone, right?
    D
    Deleted member 54065
    Your granddad is cool.
    BenJepheneT
    How to make great female character designs:
    1. Create male character
    2. Genderswap
    3. Profit
    • Like
    • Love
    Reactions: NotaNuffian, SailusGebel and Paul_Tromba
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    Wohendum
    Seems to be the running theme nowadays. Well not really I suppose since most of them keep turning out to be financial flops. Still, Hollyweird and Twitter will keep trying, even in their last moments as their last breath leaves their lungs.
    BenJepheneT
    BenJepheneT
    What Hollywood is doing is bastardising, no genderswapping. Instead of a Rule 63 they take the male base and give it a botched gender reassignment surgery.
    Agentt
    Agentt
    It took them very long to figure this out considering (make a cute flat girl+call her a boy) existed for so long
    BenJepheneT
    do gay people who know arts-and-craft do the equivalent of melting a bunch of crayons to make soap but instead of soap it's a 14-inch double sided ribbed dragon dildo
    Paul_Tromba
    Paul_Tromba
    I would assume yes since Clone-a-Willie kits exist.
    BenJepheneT
    Laura Brehm is like EDM's Nicholas Cage. She's on every DnB track, I swear. Feint used her vocals ONCE and she became Monstercat's dommy mommy ever since.
    BenJepheneT
    since ive been on a roll in watching shitty direct-to-dvd/tv movies after hearing about bruce willis, i've recently began doing The Lamp Replacement game.

    the game is to try and find as many characters in a movie that you can replace with a lamp and see if the plot stays the same.

    results may or may not surprise.
    • Like
    Reactions: Nhatduongg
    Paul_Tromba
    Paul_Tromba
    After personally seeing a lot of recent movies you could replace all of the characters with lamps and it would be far better.
    BenJepheneT
    it is my sole duty as bearer of a driver's license to plow into pedestrians. the mustang doesn't inhibit me; i inhibit the mustang's spirit. blame not my V8, but your child who made the mistake of crossing the street while im pulling 0-60 in 7 seconds.
    BenJepheneT
    the rap scene really convinced a bunch of potential jocks that writing poetry is cool, huh
    • Haha
    Reactions: Paul_Tromba and Amok
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    Amok
    imma bust a finger over vein
    imma take the roids and lift
    yeah yeah shizzy this me liftin'
    down the street my shirt astrech imma driftin'
    Paul_Tromba
    Paul_Tromba
    I mean, slam poetry sessions were brutal as could be ever since poetry became a thing. It just so happened that it coincided with hip-hop diss tracks which evolved into modern mumble rap as people stopped caring about the lyrics as much and more about the beat.
    • Like
    Reactions: Amok
    BenJepheneT
    BenJepheneT
    @Amok no offence but don't quit your day job, chief

    @Paul_Tromba I'm in for both. good lyrics are just as good as good beats/vibes. if the track comes with both, then I'm all for it.
    BenJepheneT
    there are just things that aren't meant to be comedic whatsoever that I find absolutely hilarious, like child alcoholics, or adoption reunions gone bad.

    my campus invited a speaker to talk about unwanted pregnancies and abortions and I had to hold myself back when he told about a woman who died trying to scrape the fetus out with the twisted end of a clothes hanger.
    BenJepheneT
    BenJepheneT
    i swear to god, somewhere down the line in my childhood some event flipped the switch and now I'm who I am
    Minx
    Minx
    It is what it is
    NotaNuffian
    NotaNuffian
    In a morbid sense, it did made me cough to stifle a chuckle.

    Black humor at its best.
    BenJepheneT
    ive been having much tamer thoughts as of late.

    maybe it's time.

    I've let out all the poison.

    ben is no more.

    i am just an npc.



    though not before a final hurrah:

    the silver lining in the clouds is just God's thongs; thunderclaps are exactly as they're described in this context
    BenJepheneT
    shout out to the people whom the avengers have used their cars as improvised artillery. Bet they were weeks away from paying the instalments in full too.
    • Like
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    Wohendum
    Has to be the best excuse in the world though when they meet with their insurance agents to discuss the issue. I mean, "The Hulk tossed my car at the giant flying armored worm-thing" is one of the best responses I can think of when asked what happened.
    BenJepheneT
    BenJepheneT
    The Sokovia Accords were made not because of rouge superheroes but because shield just can't afford anymore vehicular insurance claims, ESPECIALLY not after the avengers dropped a fucking city from the sky.
    W
    Wohendum
    @BenJepheneT Realistically, thats so damn likely to be true!!
    BenJepheneT
    Rent-A-Girlfriend spoilers (at this point who gives a shit about the series just click it already):

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    SailusGebel
    SailusGebel
    @BenJepheneT Perhaps you are right, but the execution is utter shit. The Korean pornhwas have more logic in them than this manga. That's my point. If the characters had at least a tiny bit of brain and logic, the whole premise of the story would fall like a card house.
    SailusGebel
    SailusGebel
    What happened to people? The story where the main hook is MC being disappointed with hooker being a hooker gets popular. What next? People would eagerly wait and read a story where an MC is seriously arguing with an alcoholic bum with a defective brain about morals and ethics and jumping out of his pants to win the argument?
    BenJepheneT
    BenJepheneT
    People wouldn't need to wait. We have that premise on webnovels in spades. If there's anything webnovelists love to do, it's to use a mouthpiece to preach and win a hypothetical arguement they'd otherwise get dunked the fuck on.
    BenJepheneT
    ⚠️

    This account has been reported to the FBI for possession and distribution of child pornography. All followers will have 24 hours to wipe associating comments and history before it is locked and investigated. Accounts remaining will be traced through their corresponding IP address.

    ⚠️​
    BenJepheneT
    once you consider most commercially disappointing entertainment works from a marketing standpoint it actually shines a more empathetic perspective on said work
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    BenJepheneT
    BenJepheneT
    Bruce's asphasia is one thing, but that still doesn't take away from how shit the films are. I'm speaking from experience; I sat through a neo Willis film marathon with my mates and I'd rather fondle Al-Assad's middle Eastern balls than do it again.
    • Haha
    Reactions: Amok
    BenJepheneT
    BenJepheneT
    But God damn, I knew it was coming but the news still hit like a truck.

    Bruce was great in Red, and that was but a half decade ago.

    All my heroes are dying, m8
    NotaNuffian
    NotaNuffian
    Time is a ship on a merciless ship.
    BenJepheneT
    I seem to change personalities every time I switch languages. Any other bilinguals who has this sensation?
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